Posted on 12/26/2007 8:08:46 AM PST by Graybeard58
It seems to me that we are getting a lot of new members and the following may be helpful to them.
Live in a solid "red" state and when anybody complains about some asinine law in their blue state, tell them to "just move from there". The simplistic solution is always the best one. Refer to California as Californicate or Kalifornia. The people's republic of (insert state name here) is always good.
When an article appears about something negative happening in public schools, proudly proclaim that all your kids are home schooled and geniuses to boot. Extra points if you also state "Publik educashun suks" extra, extra points if you put "home school" in caps and add a few exclamination points.
Any article posted about guns being used in a crime, be sure to ask what caliber gun was used and berate the author for leaving out that very relevant fact. If the good guy shot at the bad guy and missed, tell everybody that he needs more range time. Helpful also to mention what an excellent marksman you are. Post a picture of one of your guns for extra points.
When an article about those deceptive credit card companies is posted, post a reply stating one of the following, "I don't have a credit card and never will", or "I have credit cards but pay all balances if full every month", extra points if yours is the first reply on the matter. If you can squeeze it in there, also let folks know that you don't own a television set anymore and haven't since 1967. If you can't get that in, you'll just have to wait for a thread about the MSM to post it. Don't even hint at the fact that most articles posted here are from the MSM.
A "noob" or "Newbie" is a member who has been here one day less than you have, an old timer has been here at least one day longer. Noobs opinions don't mean very much because they all started forming their political philosophies the day they signed up here.
Become adept at using these terms, Noobie, troll, DUer, idiot, bigot, moron (preferred spelling - "maroon"), IBTZ etc.
Join one or more of the following as soon as possible, Spelling police, grammar police, thread police. Extra points if you join all three
I'm not fully coffeed up yet,am I logged in? Any helpful suggestions or additions are welcome.
hey, you try posting on a tiny i-phone and let me know how perfect your posts turn out.
My wife has one. No thank you.
I don’t even like her lap top comp because of the key board.
People should always spell Loser, Looser, man that just gets people all messed up, and a thread about dancing ponies can turn into a heated battle.
I’m a looser baby, when you goin to freep me, bring out yer spell check, or maybe just shoot me with a 9mm Garand, with a 6.2 mauser scope and a Schneider Silencer made from depleted uranium...
Ha ha ha, you hit some good points.
You know that your anniversary, unlike mine, which is better than yours, is going to have an asterisk next to it.
The truth is, the old DJF was a Pat Buchanan supporter that moved to Kazakstan after the massive disappointment of him losing the 2000 election.
heheheeeee!
MC and HNY !!! :^D
State that if a man still wants to get married- even after all your warnings- the only solution for him, is to get a mail order bride from outer Mongolia.
yitbos
1967?
I stopped watching TV in 1998, so I guess I’m not up to speed on the non-TV club yet.
That is very good. You have made my day. I had a good laugh, but your thread is VERY valid.
i’m down to just manicures. i hacked off all my hair, and i don’t do fancy coffee. just straight espresso with some sugar and milk.
at least the list didn’t include fancy beer!
You’ve seen those threads too?
2. If one is from California, one must always remind folks that California "gave you Reagan" and has "the fifth largest economy in the world."
3. When a photo of any woman is posted, only two words necessary: "Guilty" or "Not Guilty."
4. One must always post a photo of Helen Thomas to calm the testosterone level.
I forgot to post yesterday that no thread can be safe from a FREERIDER Hijacking.
Well any hijacking really, but we FREERIDERS do it best!!!
What’s a freerider?
Here is how it all began.
Better than this:
That’s the latest in the toy recalls from China. Oddly enough, the only thing the government found wrong with it, is that it is made of lead.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.