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Tips on how to be a good "FReeper"
self ^ | 26 Dec, 2007 | Self

Posted on 12/26/2007 8:08:46 AM PST by Graybeard58

It seems to me that we are getting a lot of new members and the following may be helpful to them.

Live in a solid "red" state and when anybody complains about some asinine law in their blue state, tell them to "just move from there". The simplistic solution is always the best one. Refer to California as Californicate or Kalifornia. The people's republic of (insert state name here) is always good.

When an article appears about something negative happening in public schools, proudly proclaim that all your kids are home schooled and geniuses to boot. Extra points if you also state "Publik educashun suks" extra, extra points if you put "home school" in caps and add a few exclamination points.

Any article posted about guns being used in a crime, be sure to ask what caliber gun was used and berate the author for leaving out that very relevant fact. If the good guy shot at the bad guy and missed, tell everybody that he needs more range time. Helpful also to mention what an excellent marksman you are. Post a picture of one of your guns for extra points.

When an article about those deceptive credit card companies is posted, post a reply stating one of the following, "I don't have a credit card and never will", or "I have credit cards but pay all balances if full every month", extra points if yours is the first reply on the matter. If you can squeeze it in there, also let folks know that you don't own a television set anymore and haven't since 1967. If you can't get that in, you'll just have to wait for a thread about the MSM to post it. Don't even hint at the fact that most articles posted here are from the MSM.

A "noob" or "Newbie" is a member who has been here one day less than you have, an old timer has been here at least one day longer. Noobs opinions don't mean very much because they all started forming their political philosophies the day they signed up here.

Become adept at using these terms, Noobie, troll, DUer, idiot, bigot, moron (preferred spelling - "maroon"), IBTZ etc.

Join one or more of the following as soon as possible, Spelling police, grammar police, thread police. Extra points if you join all three

I'm not fully coffeed up yet,am I logged in? Any helpful suggestions or additions are welcome.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: faq; fr; freeper; freeperetiquette; freerepublic; lazarus; rhetoric
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To: Graybeard58

hey, you try posting on a tiny i-phone and let me know how perfect your posts turn out.


261 posted on 12/26/2007 9:10:12 PM PST by paltz
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To: paltz

My wife has one. No thank you.

I don’t even like her lap top comp because of the key board.


262 posted on 12/26/2007 9:11:28 PM PST by Graybeard58 ( Remember and pray for SSgt. Matt Maupin - MIA/POW- Iraq since 04/09/04)
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To: Checkers

You rang?

263 posted on 12/26/2007 9:21:19 PM PST by JRios1968 (Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will. - Ben Stein)
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To: shbox
Spam spam spam spam...
264 posted on 12/26/2007 9:23:28 PM PST by JRios1968 (Faith is not believing that God can. It is knowing that God will. - Ben Stein)
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To: Graybeard58

People should always spell Loser, Looser, man that just gets people all messed up, and a thread about dancing ponies can turn into a heated battle.

I’m a looser baby, when you goin to freep me, bring out yer spell check, or maybe just shoot me with a 9mm Garand, with a 6.2 mauser scope and a Schneider Silencer made from depleted uranium...

Ha ha ha, you hit some good points.


265 posted on 12/26/2007 9:28:38 PM PST by Professional
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To: djf
Tenth anniversary, but DJF, we all know that you bought someones name and sign in date...

You know that your anniversary, unlike mine, which is better than yours, is going to have an asterisk next to it.

The truth is, the old DJF was a Pat Buchanan supporter that moved to Kazakstan after the massive disappointment of him losing the 2000 election.

266 posted on 12/26/2007 9:32:21 PM PST by Professional
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To: Slings and Arrows; Graybeard58

heheheeeee!

MC and HNY !!! :^D


267 posted on 12/26/2007 9:37:23 PM PST by MeekOneGOP (There is only one GOOD 'RAT: one that has been voted OUT of POWER !! Straight ticket GOP!)
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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick
When you post on any thread about relationships/marriage issues- Sternly warn all single men to NEVER, EVER get married. Proclaim that ALL American wimin are EEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeviiiil.

State that if a man still wants to get married- even after all your warnings- the only solution for him, is to get a mail order bride from outer Mongolia.

268 posted on 12/26/2007 11:12:22 PM PST by Pajamajan (Hello my name is fill in the blank.......)
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To: Graybeard58
We're doomed I tell you. DOOMED!!!

yitbos

269 posted on 12/27/2007 12:57:56 AM PST by bruinbirdman ("Those who control language control minds. - Ayn Rand")
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To: Graybeard58

1967?

I stopped watching TV in 1998, so I guess I’m not up to speed on the non-TV club yet.


270 posted on 12/27/2007 2:11:20 AM PST by Joya (Hark! the herald angels sing, Glory to the newborn king. Peace on earth and mercy mild ...)
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To: Slings and Arrows; Graybeard58
Posting on FR should require helmets and harnesses. ;)


271 posted on 12/27/2007 4:23:58 AM PST by Daffynition (The quieter you become, the more you are able to hear.)
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To: Graybeard58

That is very good. You have made my day. I had a good laugh, but your thread is VERY valid.


272 posted on 12/27/2007 4:38:40 AM PST by napscoordinator
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To: shbox

i’m down to just manicures. i hacked off all my hair, and i don’t do fancy coffee. just straight espresso with some sugar and milk.
at least the list didn’t include fancy beer!


273 posted on 12/27/2007 5:32:10 AM PST by absolootezer0 (white male christian hetero married gun toting SUV driving motorcycle riding conservative smoker)
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To: Pajamajan

You’ve seen those threads too?


274 posted on 12/27/2007 6:22:00 AM PST by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (RIP Eric Medlen. You will be missed.../ Get well Soon John Force!!!)
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To: Graybeard58
1. One must always link every issue to illegal immigration.

2. If one is from California, one must always remind folks that California "gave you Reagan" and has "the fifth largest economy in the world."

3. When a photo of any woman is posted, only two words necessary: "Guilty" or "Not Guilty."

4. One must always post a photo of Helen Thomas to calm the testosterone level.

275 posted on 12/27/2007 6:24:49 AM PST by Clemenza (I NO Heart Huckabee)
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To: Graybeard58; Tijeras_Slim; Allegra
Hey...you got over 200 posts, way to go.

I forgot to post yesterday that no thread can be safe from a FREERIDER Hijacking.

Well any hijacking really, but we FREERIDERS do it best!!!

276 posted on 12/27/2007 6:32:56 AM PST by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (RIP Eric Medlen. You will be missed.../ Get well Soon John Force!!!)
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To: Jersey Republican Biker Chick

What’s a freerider?


277 posted on 12/27/2007 8:18:06 AM PST by Graybeard58 ( Remember and pray for SSgt. Matt Maupin - MIA/POW- Iraq since 04/09/04)
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To: Graybeard58
FREERIDERS are child free people.

Here is how it all began.

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-bloggers/1590865/posts

278 posted on 12/27/2007 8:38:50 AM PST by Jersey Republican Biker Chick (RIP Eric Medlen. You will be missed.../ Get well Soon John Force!!!)
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To: Graybeard58

Better than this:

That’s the latest in the toy recalls from China. Oddly enough, the only thing the government found wrong with it, is that it is made of lead.


279 posted on 12/27/2007 10:00:05 AM PST by Ragtop (We are the people our parents warned us about)
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To: Graybeard58
Does this troll ACTUALLY know what IBFZ means?? Wow, folks we caught us one that was either out of Pot or his dealer was out of town for the Holidays... poor bugger, I wonder if he has a headache after all that....
280 posted on 12/27/2007 10:06:47 AM PST by Danae (Anail nathrach, orth' bhais's bethad, do chel denmha (Smoke clears and Fred Thompson is President))
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