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Friday Night Singles

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Bonus Questions

1. A Democrat legislator sued God recently for allowing natural disasters to affect the planet. He says that he is bringing the suit only to highlight the absurdity of many lawsuits and to advocate reform. Will he be kicked out of the Democrat party for asking the court system to admit that God exists?

2. When you go on a trip, do you tend to pack heavy or pack light?

3. A few weeks ago, a woman found a couple of dead animals that seem to fit the description of the "chupacabra." Has anyone heard whether her findings have been exposed as a hoax? If not, do you think they will eventually be exposed as a hoax? If you had evidence of a chupacabra, a bigfoot, or some similar critter, would you come forward with it or just keep it quiet?

In response to your question regarding what “league” people are in. It’s been my general observation that people are judged in terms of power.

For women, good looks = power. That’s pretty much the beginning, middle, and end of the story.

With men, looks count, but not nearly as much as other types of power. Money, social status, intelligence, etc. In terms of looks, being tall helps and being short definitely hurts. Being bald hurts.

I’m fairly average looking, mostly unremarkable, but look pretty good if I dress up. In situations where I’ve met guys who don’t see me dressed up, they usually have known me for a long time before asking for a date. So they do get past the looks eventually. One thing that I have found particularly annoying is having a male friend say “I wish my girlfriend were like you.” What he is saying is that he’s not willing to give up the beauty for the personality and brains, because if he were, he would be dating me.

For all you bald and/or short guys out there, I’ve dated both. I’ve dated guys who were shorter than I am. The worst thing about bald or short is that the guy is usually fixated on it. Sometimes even tall guys are hung up on their height. I dated a guy who was movie star handsome and 5’ 11-1/2” and he was obsessed about that 1/2 inch that would have put him at 6 feet tall. Not too many people would have considered him short, but it bothered him.

If I were to describe the “ideal” appearance of Mr. Right, I don’t think it would be very close to any of the men I’ve dated. For me, and I think for most women, looks are just not that important. I dated one guy who was so not good looking that when we walked down the street, children would point at him and make fun of his looks.

I’ve met men who I thought were good looking, but who soon became “ugly” in my eyes because of their obnoxious personalities. I’ve met men who were not much in the looks department, but who became handsome in my mind’s eye because they were such gentlemen.

So......my number one turn on - brains. After that, a guy needs to have a solid foundation of “nice” to hold my interest. Nice to me, nice to waitresses, nice to the bag boy in the grocery store, nice to my friends, nice to my family, nice to animals, etc. I look for a man who is nice to everyone, not just to people who are useful to him.

Hope this helps you guys out there. Bald is lovable. Short is lovable. Be confident, but not arrogant. That’s really attractive.

Best to you all!

Well, before looking in on the links and formulating cogent replies to the questions, I CAN respond to the one about looks (appearance / attractiveness): It’s very important to me. I Don’t look for “movie star” or “fashion model” beauty, but I do want a mate that I find attractive. Once attracted, though, it is important that we are compatible in other ways: common interests, a similar outlook on social/political issues, etc. And there’s the rub. I don’t consider myself an attractive specimen, and I wonder if I’m being “shallow.”

A crude but maybe accurate interpretation of what they are saying is that we all fall into a kind of relationship caste system. In sports terminology that Americans use more often to describe relationships, we're each in a "league," and we have little chance of dating or marrying someone "outside our league." If we just don't have the right stuff to marry someone in the major league, then we have to learn to accept someone in the minor league. Do you believe that this idea accurately reflects the way relationships work?

Very accurately, in fact. Speaking from my own personal experience, I find that I've even gotten to the point that I am no longer even attracted to what I'd call 'very beautiful' women because they're out of my league. I tend to only have interest in those that I feel like I have at least some realistic chance of having a relationship with.

I haven’t had much to think about the topics with the death of Corky and starting to give the rest of the cats a bath. Still, I do have a few quick thoughts where although I’m not sure of the idea of a day for unmarried people, it seems like we are breaking up into small groups, I do understand the strife that causes a chasm between us and married people. Married people it seems have more leeway at work (although in my caase, my boss is easy to work with no matter what) because of kids and the like than single people. Single people have nees too, be it to take themelves to the doctor or whatever or their parents or if they have kids of their own plus there are times we do need “mental health days” too. With the loss of Corky and Boo (last month), believe me, I could use one. I even went to work a few hours after I lost Corky, some of my co-workers thought I was crazy. BTW, we laid Corky to rest, I feel a sense of closure although I’m still hurtin’.