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Wife Studies Why Husband Ignores Nagging
Science Daily ^ | 2-13-2007

Posted on 02/14/2007 11:24:30 AM PST by blam

Wife studies why husband ignores nagging

DURHAM, N.C., Feb. 13 (UPI) -- A U.S. researcher says some people just can't help ignoring their nagging spouses.

The research, which appears online in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, found that people do not necessarily oppose others' wishes intentionally.

Duke University researchers found that "some people will act in ways that are not to their own benefit simply because they wish to avoid doing what other people want them" to do.

Psychologists describe the behavior at "reactance" -- a person's tendency to resist social influences that they perceive as threats to their autonomy.

Tanya L. Chartrand, an associate professor of marketing and psychology at Duke University's Fuqua School of Business, said even "the slightest non-conscious exposure to the name of a significant person in their life is enough to bring about reactance and cause them to rebel against that person's wishes."

Chartrand said she undertook the research as a way to understand why her husband often seemed to ignore her requests for help around the house.

"My husband, while very charming in many ways, has an annoying tendency of doing exactly the opposite of what I would like him to do in many situations," Chartrand said in a release.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: backoffimascientist; husband; marriage; nagging; selectivehearing; wife; yesdear
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Happy Valentine's Day.
1 posted on 02/14/2007 11:24:34 AM PST by blam
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To: blam

Yes, dear.


2 posted on 02/14/2007 11:26:25 AM PST by pogo101
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To: blam

It's genetic. Either God invented us so that we'd ignore them, or we evolved that way. Either way, it's for the better.


3 posted on 02/14/2007 11:28:48 AM PST by Brilliant
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To: blam
"My husband, while very charming in many ways, has an annoying tendency of doing exactly the opposite of what I would like him to do in many situations," Chartrand said in a release.

Maybe you're just a jerk, Ms. Chartrand, and hubby has found a passive-aggressive way to get your goat.

4 posted on 02/14/2007 11:30:23 AM PST by facedown (Armed in the Heartland)
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To: pogo101

But in your mind you're saying..........


5 posted on 02/14/2007 11:31:05 AM PST by Recon Dad (Marine Spec Ops Dad)
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To: blam
"some people will act in ways that are not to their own benefit simply because they wish to avoid doing what other people want them" to do.

I would say it is to their benefit in the long run, because just like a child's whine, they are not rewarding the nag.

6 posted on 02/14/2007 11:31:14 AM PST by Sax
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To: pogo101
exactly the opposite

So --- Just ask him to do exactly opposite of what you really want.

There, that wasn't so hard.

7 posted on 02/14/2007 11:31:48 AM PST by Dan(9698)
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To: blam

Easy. It's either ignore the nagging, move out, or face an inquest for her mysterious disappearance.


8 posted on 02/14/2007 11:32:08 AM PST by Larry Lucido
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To: blam

Wives don't do this to husbands....

;-)


9 posted on 02/14/2007 11:32:46 AM PST by CatQuilt (GLSEN is evil)
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To: blam

Maybe the world doesn't revolve around you. If you want the housework done, do it. I doubt your husband walks around the house wondering why you aren't cleaning the gutters.


10 posted on 02/14/2007 11:32:54 AM PST by AppyPappy (If you aren't part of the solution, there is good money to be made prolonging the problem.)
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To: blam

Ignoring women is natures way of preventing us from killing them.


11 posted on 02/14/2007 11:32:56 AM PST by Dreagon
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To: blam

Why does your husband ignore your nagging? Because smashing in your skull with a crowbar would cause too much fuss


12 posted on 02/14/2007 11:33:27 AM PST by SauronOfMordor (Never try to teach a pig to sing -- it wastes your time and it annoys the pig)
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To: blam

Ah, the science of bitching; how gauche, we all know it's an art.


13 posted on 02/14/2007 11:35:38 AM PST by Old Professer (The critic writes with rapier pen, dips it twice, and writes again.)
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To: facedown
"because they wish to avoid doing what other people want pressure them" to do." There, fixed. Cooperation needs to be mutual, otherwise, one of the parties will decide not accommodate the other.
14 posted on 02/14/2007 11:36:17 AM PST by RKV ( He who has the guns, makes the rules.)
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To: blam
She is nagging too, so I'm ignoring her also.
15 posted on 02/14/2007 11:36:53 AM PST by No Blue States
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To: blam

Ever since EVE asked ADAM "Does this Fig Leaf make me look fat?" man has developed selective hearing. It's a matter of survival.


16 posted on 02/14/2007 11:37:18 AM PST by NavyCanDo
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To: AppyPappy
"Maybe the world doesn't revolve around you. If you want the housework done, do it. I doubt your husband walks around the house wondering why you aren't cleaning the gutters."

I've already cleaned the gutters and done the house work. I don't have a wife.

17 posted on 02/14/2007 11:38:17 AM PST by blam
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To: blam

Did you write the article?


18 posted on 02/14/2007 11:40:02 AM PST by AppyPappy (If you aren't part of the solution, there is good money to be made prolonging the problem.)
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To: NavyCanDo
Ever since EVE asked ADAM "Does this Fig Leaf make me look fat?" man has developed selective hearing. It's a matter of survival.

If she had asked him THAT, none of us would be here. There is no such thing as a right answer to that question.

19 posted on 02/14/2007 11:40:02 AM PST by thulldud ("Para inglés, oprima el dos.")
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To: blam

Who paid for this BS study? If it's taxpayers, I'm gonna be PO'd!


20 posted on 02/14/2007 11:40:17 AM PST by Dr. Bogus Pachysandra ("Don't touch that thing")
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