Posted on 05/26/2006 6:37:40 AM PDT by sully777
Memorial Day Weekend Silliness Thread
Top 5014?
In B4BF.
More Bumpo?
Silly, silly, silly.
To be honest, I "borrowed" someone's picture, and it was from a thread in which wagglebee posted to you.
Yes, you're going to hell. There's no pennance to make up for that.
Good News and Bad News For a Pastor
Good News: You baptized seven people today in the river.
Bad News: You lost two of them in the swift current.
Good News: The Women’s Guild voted to send you a get-well card.
Bad News: The vote passed by 31-30.
Good News: The Elder Board accepted your job description the way you wrote it.
Bad News: They were so inspired by it, they also formed a search committee to find somebody capable of filling the position.
Good News: You finally found a choir director who approaches things exactly the same way you do.
Bad News: The choir mutinied.
Good News: Mrs. Jones is wild about your sermons.
Bad News: Mrs. Jones is also wild about the “Gong Show,” “Beavis and Butthead” and “Texas Chain Saw Massacre."
Good News: Your women’s softball team finally won a game.
Bad News: They beat your men’s softball team.
Good News: The trustees finally voted to add more church parking.
Bad News: They are going to blacktop the front lawn of your parsonage.
Good News: Church attendance rose dramatically the last three weeks.
Bad News: You were on vacation.
Good News: Your deacons want to send you to the Holy Land.
Bad News: They are stalling until the next war.
Good News: Your biggest critic just left your church.
Bad News: He has been appointed the Head Bishop of your denomination.
Good News: The youth in your church come to your house for a surprise visit.
Bad News: It’s in the middle of the night and they are armed with toilet paper and shaving cream to “decorate” your house.
Thanks for that video!
Tears running down cheeks laughing so hard!
Oldie, but goodie and goes with the tool laws posted earlier.
Laws of Life:
* Murphy's First Law for Wives: If you ask your husband to
pick up five items at the store and then you add one more as
an afterthought, he will forget two of the first five.
* Kauffman's Paradox of the Corporation: The less important
you are to the corporation, the more your tardiness or
absence is noticed.
* The Salary Axiom: The pay raise is just large enough to
increase your taxes and just small enough to have no effect
on your take-home pay.
* Miller's Law of Insurance: Insurance covers everything
except what happens.
* First Law of Living: As soon as you start doing what you
always wanted to be doing, you'll want to be doing some-
thing else.
* Weiner's Law of Libraries: There are no answers, only
cross-references.
* The Grocery Bag Law: The candy bar you planned to eat on
the way home from the market is hidden at the bottom of the
grocery bag.
* Lampner's Law of Employment: When leaving work late, you
will go unnoticed. When you leave work early, you will meet
the boss in the parking lot.
Thats great!LOL
I think I have done 99% of that.
I wish I had come up with it though! :-)
Memorial Day Weekend Official Silliness Can Now Begin!!!!
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