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'911? A squirrel's stuck in a tree ...'
Pittsburghlive.com ^
| Sunday, April 9, 2006
| Craig Smith
Posted on 04/09/2006 1:54:35 PM PDT by fanfan
Vernetta Geric won't soon forget the 911 call she received about the squirrel in the tree.
~snip~
The caller said she needed a police officer right away.
"What's the problem?" said Geric, 46, of East Pittsburgh.
"I have a large tree in my backyard ... there's a squirrel stuck in the tree."
"Ma'am, this is a squirrel? In a tree? What's the problem?"
"It's been there for about an hour. It's crying; it needs help. There's a problem," the caller insisted.
"Ma'am, sorry, but this isn't necessarily a police issue. It's a wild animal, sitting in a tree. It's supposed to be doing that. The squirrel will be OK. It'll climb down when it's ready," Geric said.
~snip~
"Sorry ma'am, this isn't a police issue. An officer wouldn't be able to do anything. The squirrel will be just fine, really."
"But police officers help people in need right?"
"Yes, ma'am. Squirrels are not people."
(Excerpt) Read more at pittsburghlive.com ...
TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Pets/Animals; Society; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: emergency911; jagoff; yunzer
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To: martin_fierro; Tijeras_Slim
"Yes, ma'am. Squirrels are not people."Heyyyyy...
Actually, no one has ever found a squirel skeleton in a tree.
Power lines, maybe, but not trees.
21
posted on
04/09/2006 4:25:16 PM PDT
by
SquirrelKing
(Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.)
To: onyx
But the squirrel was "crying."
That's a darned lie!
22
posted on
04/09/2006 4:39:35 PM PDT
by
JRios1968
(E=mc3...the origin of "friends don't let friends derive drunk.")
To: JRios1968
23
posted on
04/09/2006 4:41:32 PM PDT
by
onyx
(It's easier to indict a ham sandwich or Tom DeLay than it is to indict a Democrat.)
To: stephenjohnbanker; NicknamedBob; All
24
posted on
04/09/2006 4:41:33 PM PDT
by
fanfan
( We have become the best/biggest news gathering entity in the whole known history of the world.)
To: fanfan
The answer is simple. Send a cat up the tree to chase the squirrel down. Call the fire department to get the cat down, as it is not a police matter. Only if the squirrel is intoxicated or armed should law enforcement enter the equation. Rodents with RPGs are not to be taken lightly. Our local police department must get twenty to thirty calls a month on disruptive squirrels--everything from domestic abuse to auto theft to public intoxication. It's unreal.
What were we talking about?
To: Das Outsider
26
posted on
04/09/2006 5:15:55 PM PDT
by
fanfan
( We have become the best/biggest news gathering entity in the whole known history of the world.)
To: fanfan
You think I'm kidding? These guys are nuts!
To: onyx
Imagine Rocky J. Squirrel...
28
posted on
04/09/2006 6:05:09 PM PDT
by
JRios1968
(E=mc3...the origin of "friends don't let friends derive drunk.")
To: Das Outsider; fanfan; martin_fierro; Tijeras_Slim; stephenjohnbanker
While we're on the subject, almost, can anyone tell me how deeply I should bury the birdseed when I plant it?
My crop always seems to fail. I suspect the worms.
29
posted on
04/09/2006 6:14:43 PM PDT
by
NicknamedBob
(I don't want a World with empty dreams ... Dump the 1967 Outer Space Treaty Now! ... Farm Mars!)
To: NicknamedBob
While we're on the subject, almost, can anyone tell me how deeply I should bury the birdseed when I plant it?
Plant the seeds two to three inches deep in lightly aerated soil, at least six weeks after the last frost. Within seven to ten days, you'll see sprouts beginning to emerge. Ten to twelve weeks later, depending on harvest time, the birds should be ripe for the picking!
To: fanfan; Slings and Arrows
There really are some smart people in this world.
Then there's this woman.
31
posted on
04/09/2006 7:12:29 PM PDT
by
pcottraux
(It's pronounced "P. Coe-troe.")
To: pcottraux; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; SandyInSeattle; Darksheare; tiamat; ...
There really are some smart people in this world. Then there's this woman. Time to add some chlorine to the gene pool.
32
posted on
04/09/2006 8:13:06 PM PDT
by
Slings and Arrows
(When Al Franken had his bris, they threw away the baby and saved the foreskin.)
To: martin_fierro
The caller said she needed a police officer right away. "What's the problem?" said Geric, 46, of East Pittsburgh. "I have a large tree in my backyard ... there's a squirrel stuck in the tree." There's a squirrel on the phone.
33
posted on
04/10/2006 3:45:01 AM PDT
by
beyond the sea
(Oh, for the days when "disrespect" was just a noun.)
To: Das Outsider
A squirrel stole my 59 Vette and peed on the carpet.
34
posted on
04/10/2006 9:51:03 AM PDT
by
stephenjohnbanker
((Immigration: Acting like dupes does not earn us their respect, but their CONTEMPT.))
To: Das Outsider
Green quail need to ripen on a vine before you pick them.
35
posted on
04/10/2006 9:53:47 AM PDT
by
stephenjohnbanker
((Immigration: Acting like dupes does not earn us their respect, but their CONTEMPT.))
To: Irish_Thatcherite
In other news, a rabbit was found stuck in a burrow. And the burro was not happy about it...
36
posted on
04/10/2006 1:12:14 PM PDT
by
joesnuffy
(This 'Guest Worker Program' Is To Border Security as 'Campaign Finance Reform' Is To Free Speech)
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