The Wisdom of Selected Staff Officers - one liner summaries

Email ^ | 20 Mar 2006 | Various

[I got the rope]

I'll probably use that one this week! ROTFLMAO! Thanks for the ping.

[Slings and Arrows]

"Things are looking up for us here. In fact, Papua-New Guinea is thinking of offering two platoons: one of Infantry (headhunters) and one of engineers (hut builders). They want to eat any Iraqis they kill. We've got no issues with that, but State is being anal about it." LTC (JS) on OIF coalition-building.

[185JHP]

Do any of you FReepers remember the specific places you send the four different types of officers - Smart and Active, Smart and Passive, Stupid and Active, Stupid and Passive, attributed to the German General Staff circa WWI?

[King Prout]

um... izzat anything like Sun Tsu's breakdown of "energetic/indolent" and "competent/incompetent" generals?

[freedumb2003]

If we wait until the last minute to do it, it'll only take a minute.

I gurantee that is NOT limited to the military -- LOL!

[Diver Dave]

Funny stuff. Gonna send it on to our nephew in Iraq (1LT).

[Khurkris]

Good sourcing. Those 2 sites are probably the birth place of his email. Neptunus Rex most likely. Thanks!

[Cannoneer No. 4]

Strategy Page had it several months ago.

[Victoria Delsoul]

They are all good.

And this one is pretty good.

"Cynicism is the smoke that rises from the ashes of burned out dreams."

[185JHP]

I haven't read much of Sun Tzu. I only remember one of the places in the thing I asked about - Stupid and Active get sent to the most dangerous place in the battle zones...

[Poodlebrain]

Firing Battery XO has got to be one of the best jobs in the Army.

[King Prout]

yes, that one is particularly poetic

[King Prout]

"An incompetent and energetic general is a clamity" - Sun Tsu

[dcwusmc]

PINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dcwusmc]

"USCENTCOM commanders announced today that they intend to maintain their presence in Qatar "until the sun runs out of hydrogen," thus committing the US to the longest duration deployment in human
history. When asked how they planned to maintain the presence in Qatar for a projected length of 4 to 5 billion years, planners said "we're working on a plan for that. We don't have one yet, but not having a plan
or an intelligent reason to do something has never been much of an impediment for us in the past; we don't foresee it being a big show stopper for us in the future either." Among the options that were being discussed was an innovative program to "interbreed" the deployed personnel. "We are going to actively encourage the military members in Qatar to intermarry and raise children that will replace them in the future. Sure, it may be a little hard on some of our female service members, since there currently are about 8 men for every woman over there, but we expect that to be OBE as the sex ratios will even out in a
generation or two. In any case the key to the plan is to make these assignments not only permanent, but inheritable and hereditary. For example, if you currently work the JOC weather desk, so will your children, and their children, and their children, ad infinitum. We like to think of it as job security." CPT (CJTF-180)

[Cannoneer No. 4]

[LiteKeeper]

My favorite from my staff officer days: "We are being told to do more and more with less and less, until eventually we will be doing everything with nothing."

[Watery Tart]

Read later....

[R. Scott]

"Things are looking up for us here. In fact, Papua-New Guinea is thinking of offering two platoons: one of Infantry (headhunters) and one of engineers (hut builders). They want to eat any Iraqis they kill. We've got no issues with that, but State is being anal about it." LTC (JS) on OIF coalition-building.

I had the pleasure of working with an exchange NCO from the New Guinea Defense Force back in the early 80s. He was from a small hill village and sported the facial tattoos denoting his history and affiliations. In the evenings we would often talk about head hunting, cannibalism and feud warfare. There was little or no police presence in his home area, so the death feuds were still not uncommon. The look he would give to anyone who dared refer to him as “African-American” made me believe he would not be against taking the head and eating the liver.

[R. Scott]

It well describes my Christmas shopping routine.