I am not a poster. I am a crispy critter.

[The Zontron 7000]

I am an internet java script sent to infiltrate your site and transform you from political neanderthals into a modern 21st Century progressive mode.

This is your first warning.

Do not try and resist.

It is useless.

Accept your fate.

You will be assimilated.

[Knitting A Conundrum]

It's snowing at above the 6000 ft line...I'm at 4500 so I am getting drizzle...

[Knitting A Conundrum]

Today, I feel good! Day before yesterday I hurt as the front got near.

But I am secretly dreaming of southern Louisiana winter light...much brighter than lead gray!

[Das Outsider]

Ok...I knew this day would come. Let me explain the meaning behind the Kim posts. Ahem....

The Kim Jong Il posts began during the CAFTA debate. Certain posters were comparing their opponents (anti-CAFTA) as being in league with Communist dictators. A thought occured to me: Don't they support Kim Jong Il or Hu Jintao on other issues? So, the Kim posts were born, out of retaliation, if you will.

The language of Kimese (Huish, as well) is a little disturbing to many. It is based on phonetics, not like many of the words in the English language. What makes it complicated is the Korean accent. In theory, it is easier than most languages once you understand that there is a key to it.

Kim's hip-hop career is another anomaly. The man is in his 60s--how odd! Precisely, but there's more to it. If you know much about American hip-hop/rap/gangsta rap, you know that a lot the language involves power, wealth, women, and killing people. What are Kim Jong Il's top four priorities? That aspect tends to turn off posters over 35 or 40.

The introduction of Hu Jintao as Kim's temporary substitute was a natural one. To put it in rather blunt terms, Kim is a puppet of China. Hu is a rather pleasant, accomodating figure in the posts, who really just wants to be accepted. Kim, on the other hand, is unapologetically himself and cares little about consequences. Both are tricksters, to be sure, but they go about it in different ways.

All of this has basis in reality: it is just a short explanation of the method to my madness.

[Monkey Face]

Which is one of the main reasons I'm here and not there: I can't stand the SAD depression. You can always visit me, you know...;o]

[NicknamedBob]

'Then tell me...wha'?"

Well, let me put it this way. I do appreciate the effort that goes into creating them.

[Knitting A Conundrum]

SAD sucks.

[Monkey Face]

I actually find the posts amusing, but when you post so many in a row, I get confused (but don't let that stop you...confusion is part of who I am. I have blonde roots.)

[Monkey Face]

Yes, it does. I can't deal with it. I think when I was in TX (three years) we had MAYBE two weeks of sunshine! I HAD to leave.

[Das Outsider]

I actually find the posts amusing, but when you post so many in a row,

They were originally intended for immigration threads exclusively. When the hurricanes hit, illegal immigration stories disappeared, so here was Kim with nothing to do. He went out into the general public and voila!

[Monkey Face]

Ah...it all makes more sense now. Your ability to post them as Kim and Hu is nothing short of amazing (to me, at least) and before I forget my manners, thanks for the levity!

You're always welcome in the castle. ;o]

[Das Outsider]

You're always welcome in the castle. ;o]

Yeah, now that I've let the tiger out of the bag! ;)

[Monkey Face]

You were welcome before that, in case you didn't know it.

[Das Outsider]

Ah...it all makes more sense now.

You know what's funny? In all of the Kim posts from CAFTA to the border to present day, not one person has gotten angry about it, as though I were trying to prop up some pot-bellied midget punk with a bad haircut. I even did a few North Korea threads using Kim.

[Das Outsider]

I do appreciate the effort that goes into creating them.

It takes virtually no effort at this point.

Since I'm being normal for a little while, what's the word on your latest technical endeavor?

[Monkey Face]

Funny character! How can anyone be angry about someone who is, in actuality, a doo-doo head? You just make him a little funnier.

[NicknamedBob]

"...what's the word on your latest technical endeavor?"

Oh, everything is going great! It's even better than I thought it would be!

Er, um, which technical endeavor are we talking about?

[Das Outsider]

Funny character! How can anyone be angry about someone who is, in actuality, a doo-doo head? You just make him a little funnier.

The accent is very much me-so-solly, so it might appear to be mocking Asians--Koreans in particular. The fact that I use a character who is arguably the worst living dictator might come across to some as irreverent or shallow. That isn't the point.

If--or when--North Korea is opened up to outsiders, the mass graves will be found and we will be talking about one-million or more murdered by the present Kim regime. This is just my speculation.

In light of that, I don't take issues of mass genocide with levity. You must remember, though, that Communist dictatorships are about personality cults. Their "Dear Leaders"--as in the case of Kim--are gods; they believe themselves to be such. To mock, joke about, or comically represent them is tantamount to blasphemy--and that's where I come in.

[Alice au Wonderland]

I'm back for a brief spell, then out for errands, then back home again, jiggedy-jig.

Where's my Martooni?

Oh, wait. I have to make it for myself.

Where's the bar in this place?

[Das Outsider]

Er, um, which technical endeavor are we talking about?

You know--the one with the thing that does cool stuff with other cool stuff to make something else that goes somewhere or something. Remember?