Posted on 09/13/2005 8:12:30 PM PDT by sasherm13
This is a great quote from Bob Hope. Enjoy.
http://home.insightbb.com/~sasherm13/Greatest_Movie_Line_Ever.wmv
No, the French war cry is "We surrender"!!
Sorry, not a movie.....
ARTHUR: I am. And this my trusty servant Patsy. We have
ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights
who will join me in my court at Camelot. I must speak with your
lord and master.
GUARD #1: What, ridden on a horse?
ARTHUR: Yes!
GUARD #1: You're using coconuts!
ARTHUR: What?
GUARD #1: You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're
bangin' 'em together.
ARTHUR: So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered
this land, through the kingdom of Mercea, through--
GUARD #1: Where'd you get the coconut?
ARTHUR: We found them.
GUARD #1: Found them? In Mercea? The coconut's tropical!
ARTHUR: What do you mean?
GUARD #1: Well, this is a temperate zone.
ARTHUR: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house
martin or the plumber may seek warmer climes in winter yet these
are not strangers to our land.
GUARD #1: Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
ARTHUR: Not at all, they could be carried.
GUARD #1: What -- a swallow carrying a coconut?
ARTHUR: It could grip it by the husk!
GUARD #1: It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a
simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not
carry a 1 pound coconut.
ARTHUR: Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your
master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here.
GUARD #1: Listen, in order to maintain air-speed velocity, a
swallow needs to beat its wings 43 times every second, right?
ARTHUR: Please!
GUARD #1: Am I right?
ARTHUR: I'm not interested!
GUARD #2: It could be carried by an African swallow!
GUARD #1: Oh, yeah, an African swallow maybe, but not a European
swallow, that's my point.
GUARD #2: Oh, yeah, I agree with that...
ARTHUR: Will you ask your master if he wants to join my court
at Camelot?!
GUARD #1: But then of course African swallows are not migratory.
GUARD #2: Oh, yeah...
GUARD #1: So they couldn't bring a coconut back anyway...
[clop clop]
GUARD #2: Wait a minute -- supposing two swallows carried it
together?
GUARD #1: No, they'd have to have it on a line.
GUARD #2: Well, simple! They'd just use a strand of creeper!
GUARD #1: What, held under the dorsal guiding feathers?
GUARD #2: Well, why not?
"Best movie quote ever"
Good, bad.....I'm the guy with the gun.
Ash-Army of Darkness
We have found a witch; may we burn her?
As far as I'm concerned that one from WKRP is an all time classic. Bravo
1. "Suppose I shot you. How'd that be? Huh?"
2. "Some things in life are bad
they can really make you mad,
other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle,
don't grumble, give a whistle!
And this'll help things turn out for the best:
And...always look on the bright side of life..."
TIM: There he is!
ARTHUR: Where?
TIM: There!
ARTHUR: What, behind the rabbit?
TIM: It is the rabbit!
ARTHUR: You silly sod! You got us all worked up!
TIM: Well, that's no ordinary rabbit. That's the most foul,
cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on.
ROBIN: You tit! I soiled my armor I was so scared!
TIM: Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide, it's
a killer!
???: Get stuffed!
TIM: It'll do you a trick, mate!
???: Oh, yeah?
ROBIN: You manky Scot's git!
TIM: I'm warning you!
ROBIN: What's he do, nibble your bum?
TIM: He's got huge, sharp-- he can leap about-- look at the
bones!
ARTHUR: Go on, Bors. Chop his head off!
BORS: Right! Silly little bleeder. One rabbit stew comin'
right up!
TIM: Look!
[squeak]
BORS: Aaaugh!
[chord]
ARTHUR: Jesus Christ!
TIM: I warned you!
ROBIN: I did it again!
TIM: I warned you! But did you listen to me? Oh, no, you knew
it all, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny, isn't
it? Well, it's always the same, I always--
ARTHUR: Oh, shut up!
TIM: --But do they listen to me?--
ARTHUR: Right!
TIM: -Oh, no--
KNIGHTS: Charge!
[squeak squeak]
KNIGHTS: Aaaaugh! Aaaugh! etc.
KNIGHTS: Run away! Run away!
TIM: Haw haw haw. Haw haw haw. Haw haw.
ARTHUR: Right. How many did we lose?
???: Gawain.
???: Hector.
ARTHUR: And Boris. That's five.
GALAHAD: Three, sir.
ARTHUR: Three. Three. And we'd better not risk another frontal
assault, that rabbit's dynamite.
ROBIN: Would it help to confuse it if we run away more?
ARTHUR: Oh, shut up and go and change your armor.
GALAHAD: Let us taunt it! It may become so cross that it will
make a mistake.
ARTHUR: Like what?
GALAHAD: Well,....
ARTHUR: Have we got bows?
???: No.
LAUNCELOT: We have the Holy Hand Grenade.
ARTHUR: Yes, of course! The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch! 'Tis
one of the sacred relics Brother Maynard carries with him! Brother
Maynard! Bring up the Holy Hand Grenade!
[singing]
How does it, uh... how does it work?
???: I know not, my liege.
ARTHUR: Consult the Book of Armaments!
MAYNARD: Armaments, Chapter Two, Verses Nine to Twenty-One.
BROTHER: "And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high,
saying, 'Oh, Lord, bless this thy hand grenade that with it thou
mayest blow thy enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord
did grin, and people did feast upon the lambs, and sloths, and
carp, and anchovies, and orangutans, and breakfast cereals, and
fruit bats, and large --"
MAYNARD: Skip a bit, Brother.
BROTHER: "And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out
the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less.
Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the
counting shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either
count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is
right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be
reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards
thou foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.'"
MAYNARD: Amen.
ALL: Amen.
ARTHUR: Right! One... two... five!
???: Three, sir!
ARTHUR: Three!
Wait. Where are you going? I was going to make Espresso.
Desk Clerk - No
Dog bites Clouseau when he reaches to bite...
Clouseau - I thought you said your dog doesn't bite
Desk Clerk - It's not my dog.
Sorry - reaches to pet not reaches to bite.
I also liked this one:
"I see you managed to get your shirt off."
Also said by Dr. Lazarus, played to dead-pan perfection by Alan Rickman.... /drool
Clint Eastwood in "The Outlaw Josey Wales".
Another "Animal House" quote: "I would advise you to start drinking heavily."
"Animal House" had special significance for me. When I saw the movie I was looking at my sophomore year in college -- what I remembered of it. I went on academic probation for a while, but I am told I had a lot of fun.
"I'm shocked, shocked to hear there's gambling"
"Your winnings, sir!
"Why don't you come up and see me sometime?"
It was first delivered on screen not BY Mae West, but TO Mae West. W.C Fields said the line to her in the last scene in My Little Chickadee as she was leaving, and he was halfway up the staircase in the western boarding house.
Congressman Billybob
John Wayne: "I won't be wronged, I won't be insulted, and I won't be laid a hand on. I don't do these things to others, and I demand the same from them." (The Shootist)
Words to live by.
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