Posted on 05/13/2005 1:27:53 PM PDT by pissant
Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Women
1. You can enjoy a beer all month long.
2. Beer stains wash out.
3. You don't have to wine and dine beer.
4. Your beer will always wait patiently for you in the car while you play baseball/soccer/basketball/etc.
5. When your beer goes flat, you toss it out.
6. Beer is never late.
7. A beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer.
8. Hangovers go away.
9. Beer labels come off without a fight.
10. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a beer.
11. Beer never has a headache.
12. After you've had a beer, the bottle is still worth 5 cents.
13. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have another beer on your breath.
14. If you pour a beer right, you'll always get good head.
15. A beer always goes down easy.
16. You can have more than one beer in a night and not feel guilty.
17. You can share a beer with your friends.
18. You always know you're the first one to pop a beer.
19. Beer is always wet.
20. Beer doesn't demand equality.
21. You can have a beer in public.
22. A beer doesn't care when you come.
23. A frigid beer is a good beer.
24. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good.
25. If you change beers, you don't have to pay alimony.
26. Good beer costs less than good women.
27. A beer doesn't change its mind after you've taken off its top.
28. Beer doesn't expect an hour of foreplay before satisfying you.
29. A beer looks as good in the morning as it did when the bar closed.
30. You can't get thrown in jail for having a beer under the grandstand at halftime.
31. Afterwards, a beer won't feel guilty, cry, propose, call her mother, your ex-wife or her therapist.
32. Beer never bugs you to have little beers.
33. If your preference for a type of beer changes, you don't have to get involved with lawyers.
34. Beers don't want a lasting relationship.
35. A beer doesn't make you sleep onthe couch after you've taken six other beers on a picnic.
36. After you've put your lips to a beer, a beer never asks, "What are you doing?"
37. Finishing a beer in 3 seconds is something to be proud of.
38. You can have a beer on your lunch hour.
39. A beer never wants to stay up afterwards talking about respect.
40. A beer won't slap you in the face for putting it between your legs at a drive-in movie.
LOL
Yup... pissant thread.
At least you're consistant. :)
I am sooooo not in the mood for this one right now. I'm gonna go make my own list, "Why Life is Better with No Man Around" . . .
If it makes you feel any better, go to the link and look. There is the TOP REASONS WHY BEER IS BETTER THAN MEN on the site.
A man is living proof that women can take a joke.
Ping me when you make that list.
Sorry. I can't play today. Too rotten of a mood.
there you go again, stirring up trouble.
I understand. See item #1. hehehe
Top 10 Reasons why some Men prefer Guns over Women
#10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.
#9. You can keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're on the road.
#8. Admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.
#7. Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you keep another handgun for a backup.
#6. Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.
#5. A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.
#4. Handguns function normally every day of the month.
#3. A handgun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?"
#2. A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.
And the number one reason a handgun is favored over a woman:
#1. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A HANDGUN
me? nah!
if you need help with that list, let me know.
LOLOLOL
"me? nah!"
Is anyone SURPRISED this thread was started by PISSANT?
Thirsty PING
I was. Do I count?
to the thirsty ping and you, my funny pissant. My schedule:
http://216.46.238.5/go/chicagocircle/links/my_schedule.html
I know that is not true, but feel better anyway.
Good Reasons Why Beer Is Better Than Men
1. A beer NEVER leaves the toilet seat up.
Hehe. True so true.
Man is living proof that most women are a joke! (Running in high gear with flame retardent suit on)
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