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Ask Dog Lady: Fake testicles tell more about your boyfriend than your dog (very funny)
TownOnline ^ | 1/5/04 | Rachel & Dog Lady

Posted on 01/06/2005 11:28:58 AM PST by pissant

click here to read article


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To: pissant

Why aren't they called, "Nut-icles?"


21 posted on 01/06/2005 11:48:20 AM PST by Joe 6-pack ("We deal in hard calibers and hot lead." - Roland Deschaines)
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To: xm177e2
I think the real issue is that this lady wants to castrate her boyfriend, not the dog. She's subconsciously finding a reason to hate him so she can mistreat him. He should run away as fast as he can.

Please tell me you aren't that paranoid. Most male dogs are much easier to be around, and lead much longer and healthier lives neutered. Prosthetics for dog balls are THE dumbest thing I have ever heard of.

22 posted on 01/06/2005 11:50:20 AM PST by HairOfTheDog
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To: HairOfTheDog

Hey, if your wife had you neutered, you would at least want a pair on Neuticles when you went to the Sauna room, I would think.


23 posted on 01/06/2005 11:52:39 AM PST by pissant
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To: HairOfTheDog

My question is - how do you know they work?


24 posted on 01/06/2005 11:53:30 AM PST by sandalwood ("Hail to alcohol - the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems")
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To: pissant
OMG! After reading this I still didn't believe it was real but.........

Canine Co-Inventor Loses Cancer Fight For Life For Immediate Release

Buckner, MO - Buck- the 194 lb bloodhound that prompted the idea of testicular implants for pets seven years ago -died today after a 72 hour fight for life.

"We are deeply saddened and will miss Buck a great deal" said Gregg A. Miller, president and founder of the Missouri- based CTI-Neuticles Corporation. Miller said Buck died from complications associated with liver cancer.

Buck is featured on the company's website -and has received national and Worldwide publicity since the products introduction.

Miller said Neuticles were invented due to the trauma he and Buck experienced.

"Buck was seven months-old and as ornery as they came," Miller recalled. "Well- the day came when I had to consider neutering- and was really surprised that the testicles are permanently removed when the pet is neutered." Miller said. "Buck would no longer be Buck!".

Deeply concerned, Miller asked his Missouri veterinarian, Dr R.D. Holder of Independence if implants were available so Buck would look the same.

"I've been a veterinarian for over 45 years and it had never been thought of," Dr Holder said. "I told Gregg it sounded like a very good idea as many pet owners hesitate or even refuse to neuter because of this," he said.

Buck was neutered the traditional way in 1993 - but the final decision to begin research and development of the now patented product and procedures was made when Miller noticed Buck's dissatisfaction by his apparent loss.

"Unquestionably, Buck noticed the change -and it was decided to give pet owners Worldwide an "option" when neutering their beloved pet."

Following two years of research and development costing- in excess of $500,000 - the first commercial implantation was performed on Dec. 20, 1995. Since that time, over 60,000 canines, felines, horses and bulls have been "Neuticled" in all 50 states and 24 countries.

"We've even Neuticled a prairie dog in Kansas, two water buffalo in Colorado and a colony of rats in Louisiana," Miller said. "The first monkey is in two weeks and we're excited to help even monkey's 'look and feel' the same." .

Neuticles are endorsed or recommended by many local, regional and national humane societies Worldwide including the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.

Private services for Buck the Bloodhound are to be held at Pet Cremation Services of Kansas City

# # # For additional information or media kit contact Gregg Miller 816-650-6655 or email: Neuticles@aol.com

For Questions Or Location Of A Participating Veterinary Clinic Or Hospital In Your Neighborhood Call Toll Free 888-638-8425 Outside of the U.S. Call 816-350-7298

E-mail: Neuticles@aol.com - For Immediate Response

25 posted on 01/06/2005 11:53:49 AM PST by apackof2 (Spell..Preview...Post)
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To: Joe 6-pack

"Why aren't they called, "Nut-icles?""

Hey, I used to enjoy a candy called Peanuttles when I was a kid. It kinda makes me wonder....


26 posted on 01/06/2005 11:53:49 AM PST by pissant
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To: pissant

Heh... first of all, I am a wife.... So I may not be qualified to answer on the proper size of neuticles.... They impress men more than they impress us gals, I think :~D


27 posted on 01/06/2005 11:54:30 AM PST by HairOfTheDog
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To: sandalwood

work?


28 posted on 01/06/2005 11:54:47 AM PST by HairOfTheDog
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To: Joe 6-pack
Or Nut Poppers?


29 posted on 01/06/2005 11:55:05 AM PST by reagan_fanatic (Rap - the other Disco)
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To: HairOfTheDog

Dumber than a facelift for a Shar Pei pup?


30 posted on 01/06/2005 11:55:07 AM PST by Diddle E. Squat
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To: pissant

You can get them for your vehicle, too:
www.yournutz.com

I saw a truck in town that had these and I couldn't believe it! I had to do a double-take to make sure I wasn't nuts or something.

31 posted on 01/06/2005 11:55:22 AM PST by Ryan Spock
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To: apackof2
We've even Neuticled a ...colony of rats in Louisiana

Brings to mind "Johnny Dangerously"

32 posted on 01/06/2005 11:56:01 AM PST by sandalwood ("Hail to alcohol - the cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems")
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To: TheBigB; Owl_Eagle; Sam's Army; hellinahandcart; Incorrigible

Just your everyday run-of-the-mill dogs, fake testicles, and Rush Limbaugh ping!


33 posted on 01/06/2005 11:56:22 AM PST by HenryLeeII (Democrats have helped kill more Americans than the Soviets and Nazis combined!)
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To: pissant

I loved reading this piece. Back in the early 70's when fewer than 500 Bouvier des Flandres dogs were ever sold in the USA, we got our first one. The breeder told us about a guy who bought a Bouvier male pup that was born with only one testicle and the dog had great show presence, otherwise. So, the new owner had a testicle implanted to make up for the one that naturally was missing. During a dog show, the judge was checking out his dog and called over the other judges.

Guess what? That other testicle had finally came down and the judge felt three, count them, three testicles.

The poor dog was disqualified and the owner banned from future shows! Ha! You can't make this stuff up!


34 posted on 01/06/2005 11:56:30 AM PST by Spottys Spurs
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To: pissant

When they raise taxes we send tea bags (ala boston tea party)

Now we send testicles...

(the GOP testicles must be in a jar on hitlary's shelf)


35 posted on 01/06/2005 11:57:24 AM PST by longtermmemmory (VOTE!)
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To: Ryan Spock

Anybody who puts that trash on their cars deserves to have their tires shot out...


36 posted on 01/06/2005 11:57:36 AM PST by Diddle E. Squat
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To: Ryan Spock

Oh...my...God.


I don't know whether to laugh or barf! :)


37 posted on 01/06/2005 11:58:26 AM PST by exnavychick (There's too much youth; how about a fountain of smart.)
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To: pissant

I heard about these things a few years ago and I could not believe there was a market. I mean, sticking them in a show dog would get you thrown out of the AKC and otherwise, what's the point?

So I asked my cousin who is a vet. He said that 100% of the implantations he'd heard of involved men who were more or less forced to neuter their dogs (wife insisted, shelter insisted, health issues) and who just couldn't believe that Fido wasn't suffering mightily as a result.

I would dump the boyfriend, though. Friends don't give friends Neuticals.


38 posted on 01/06/2005 11:58:32 AM PST by Gingersnap
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To: HairOfTheDog

It's a guy thing. Nuts.


39 posted on 01/06/2005 11:58:47 AM PST by CindyDawg
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To: Diddle E. Squat
Dumber than a facelift for a Shar Pei pup?

As dumb as laser beard removal for Miss Beazley


40 posted on 01/06/2005 11:59:09 AM PST by HairOfTheDog
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