Posted on 06/26/2025 12:34:47 PM PDT by DFG
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth responded to allegations of sexism on Thursday by vowing that the United States military would never discriminate against chicks, broads, or dames.
Hegseth had fallen under criticism after apparently failing to specifically recognize the females who participated in the air strikes on Iran, leading him to issue a clarifying statement that the armed forces would never engage in prejudice against skirts.
"I'm sorry for the lack of gender inclusive language," Hegseth said, apologizing to Associated Press reporter Tara Copp. "It was not my intention to impugn the contributions of any chicks, broads, or dames. The military is full of sexy birds and I don't want to downplay the hard work of our babes on the ground, toots."
According to Hegseth, the whole thing was just a big misunderstanding. "I congratulated our 'boys in the bombers' because there were boys in those planes, not because I hate dames," he said. "But you're right, I should have acknowledged the vixens providing support over the radio. They're our pilot's greatest cheerleaders."
According to sources, Hegseth's apology did not go over well, with many calling for his resignation. But the defense secretary says the reaction isn't unprecedented. "Chicks can be like that sometimes," he admitted. "But I'll buy them some flowers and everything will be right as rain."
At publishing time, Pete Hegseth found himself in the proverbial doghouse and said he would do whatever would be necessary to smooth things over with all of the saucy little minxes.
Thats gold Jerry. GOLD!!!
Just recently I was asked if I wanted to study abroad, and I said it depended on who she was. At my age I can get away with it.
Who made the sandwiches?
LOL.
I remember my father telling us about Waves and Wacs; and that in his Marines they referred to ‘BAMS’ - Broad-assed Marines.
Funny. I always liked Rush’s comment that he was a big fan of the Women’s Movement, especially from the behind.
The LGBQT+ crowd refer to them as front holers. I kid you not.
The Bee made my day again...Thanks...
Just to clarify: Sec. Hegseth does not discriminate. His list of hotties includes Pam Bondi, Kristi Noem, Tulsi Gabbard and Tom Homan. Clearly, a properly diverse group. 😵💫
Well. Reportedly there was a woman B2 driver on this Hammer mission. Girls can fly airplanes. Bombers. They used to be kept out of combat
Hegseth could have said something different. He will from now on without apologizing- which is the best way around
As a former active duty military woman, I’ve heard it all. I don’t care. I’ll bet she doesn’t care. I don’t know.
I'll get even!
-Gunnery Sergeant Hartman (R. Lee Ermey)
I just had coffee running out of my nose, on that first sentence. SNL would do well to have a Babylon Bee segment..
Could Hegseth be any more Hegsethy?
...nothing in the world....! ;)
Chocolate, Pete. Always deploy chocolate along with the flowers.
A gift certificate to a spa day is sometimes necessary but you really have to have messed up for that to be required.
Generally (see what I did there?) flowers and chocolate should do the trick. And not the kind you get at the gas station either. Not unless you are on a budget.
And Pete, we have all seen the size of your budget. Makes us a little ill thinking about it.
So, flowers, chocolate and a sorry babe should do it.
And Babes?
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