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Biden Approves $40 Billion Worth Of Drugs To Be Airdropped To Burning Man
Babylon Bee ^ | 9/4/23 | staff

Posted on 09/04/2023 1:26:50 PM PDT by CFW

BLACK ROCK CITY, NV — President Biden has approved an emergency shipment of $40 billion worth of drugs be airdropped to stranded revelers at the Burning Man Festival.

"Look, Jack, we have 70,000 hippies stranded in tents in the middle of the desert with no uppers, downers, OR psychedelics," he noted from his beach chair in Delaware. "That's why I've asked Congress to declare a state of emergency and rush these much-needed drugs to Nevada immediately!"

Sources noted that supplies of illicit substances had been running low after heavy rains stranded attendees in the desert for several days. "Many of these folks only brought enough drugs for two days," a source at the festival noted. "As they remain stranded for the fourth day, people are beginning to reach critical levels of sobriety!"

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Government; Politics; Society
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; babyonbee; biden; burningman; humor
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Hilarious! But, Biden may just do it!
1 posted on 09/04/2023 1:26:50 PM PDT by CFW
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To: CFW

Wait a minute...that’s Hunter’s stash.


2 posted on 09/04/2023 1:34:05 PM PDT by lowbridge ("Let’s check with Senator Schumer before we run it" - NY Times)
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To: CFW

3 posted on 09/04/2023 1:34:30 PM PDT by GaltAdonis
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To: CFW

It more like a bad camping trip than Bataan Death March.


4 posted on 09/04/2023 1:36:09 PM PDT by Lonesome in Massachussets (If Kitty Genovese had a gun, she’d be in jail today.)
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To: CFW

I wish they wouldn’t give the Big Guy any ideas.


5 posted on 09/04/2023 1:47:13 PM PDT by BipolarBob (Our politicians are such a treasure. You just want to bury them.)
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To: CFW
This monster of a rainstorm was less than 1" in 24 hours.
6 posted on 09/04/2023 1:48:39 PM PDT by Sacajaweau ( )
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To: All

Resident Biden has approved an emergency shipment of $40 billion worth of
hallucinogenic drugs be airdropped to stranded Burning Man Festival goers.

“Look, Jack, we have 70,000 hippies stranded in tents in the middle of the desert with no uppers, downers, OR psychedelics,” the tolerant and compassionate Biden noted, wiping away tears.

Speaking from his well-worn beach chair in Delaware, Biden compassionately noted, “That’s why I’ve asked Congress to declare a state of emergency and rush these much-needed illicit drugs to Nevada immediately!”


7 posted on 09/04/2023 1:51:02 PM PDT by Liz (More tears are shed over answered prayers than over unanswered ones. St Teresa of Avila)
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To: GaltAdonis

Money well spent, if it was pure uncut fentanyl.


8 posted on 09/04/2023 1:53:37 PM PDT by READINABLUESTATE (Make orwell fiction again)
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To: GaltAdonis

That picture sends chills down my spine. Looks like the worlds largest homeless encampment/ junk yard.


9 posted on 09/04/2023 1:57:34 PM PDT by usurper (AI was born with a birth defect.)
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To: CFW

Probably should drop a few fire extinguishers too and lots of “Pooph” spray as seen on TV.


10 posted on 09/04/2023 1:58:49 PM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (I don't know what the hell it is but you can bet in America, it's "racist" and needs to be cancelled)
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To: BipolarBob

Only 2% of the attendees are black—Burning Man needs to follow proper DIE procedures if they want federal help....


11 posted on 09/04/2023 1:59:32 PM PDT by cgbg ("Creative minds have always been known to survive any kind of bad training." Anna Freud.)
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To: CFW

The way government agencies hand out drugs to addicts like candy, this would be feasible.


12 posted on 09/04/2023 3:02:11 PM PDT by metmom (He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.)
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To: Sacajaweau
This monster of a rainstorm was less than 1" in 24 hours.

Enough rain to cause the massive amount of mud that is plaguing that desert area........

13 posted on 09/04/2023 3:06:56 PM PDT by Hot Tabasco
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To: CFW

Don’t eat the Brown acid... The Brown acid is bad, or depending upon your experience... Really, really good.


14 posted on 09/04/2023 4:37:39 PM PDT by jerod (Nazi's were essentially Socialist in Hugo Boss uniforms... Get over it!)
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To: jerod

“Don’t eat the Brown acid... “


Classic!


15 posted on 09/04/2023 5:41:40 PM PDT by CFW (I will not comply!)
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To: GaltAdonis; Chode; SkyDancer; Salamander; Carriage Hill; Lockbox; MtnClimber; nascarnation; ...

It’s a CROP CIRCLE with out crops !!!

Hold on while I run that through the Binary Translator.

OK got it:

VOTE FOR TRUMP, NOT the chump, CIVILIZATION’S CONTINUED SURVIVAL DEPENDS ON IT !!!!


16 posted on 09/04/2023 5:47:51 PM PDT by mabarker1 ( (Congress- the opposite of PROGRESS!!! A fraud, a hypocrite, a liar. I'm a member of Congress!!!)
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To: mabarker1

love the Bee


17 posted on 09/04/2023 6:05:18 PM PDT by Chode (there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
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To: CFW

I thought this was a true news article, and Dementia Joe was going to Covid-19 vaxes onto Burning Man.
Does Burning Man have anything to do with Zozobra and the Santa Fe Fiesta?


18 posted on 09/04/2023 8:52:14 PM PDT by NetAddicted (MAGA2024)
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To: Liz

A White House spokesman said President Biden has appointed his son Hunter to lead the operation. “Nobody knows more about obtaining and distributing drugs than the president’s son,” the spokesman said.

At publishing time, festival attendees complained that the emergency airdrop only seemed to contain $30 billion worth of drugs and that Hunter Biden was nowhere to be seen.


19 posted on 09/05/2023 8:25:38 AM PDT by xp38
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To: xp38

Rotflol.........nice addition......lol.


20 posted on 09/05/2023 8:40:40 AM PDT by Liz (More tears are shed over answered prayers than over unanswered ones. St Teresa of Avila)
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