Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

This situation is similar to that being faced by a guy I know. (Note, it's not me. I am female.)

I am interested in your thoughts and advice, especially if you have had some personal experience of a similar nature.

In my guy's case, the comment was verbal and was made a month before the complaint and the complaint was made a week after the accuser got caught by my guy violating a procedure and informed her boss, who doesn't like him because, if I have the story right, she (the boss) blames him for not getting a promotion.

The comment, made to the subordinate and overheard at the time by her boss, whom my guy was on the way to talk to about some work matter or other, was something along the lines of "Did you move? I haven't seen you here early like I used to."

And then they (two newish HR people, female, of course) also dredged up a comment he made over two years ago about someone having a nice dress on, or something like that. I believe this was another situation where the person complained about a month later when she too got in trouble for violating a procedure.

(He is in a position to see violations based on alerts he gets on the system about things. It is literally his job to look into these and take some sort of action, which has, in the past resulted in people getting fired who have friends still at the company who are upset about that. It tends to be more so women who get in trouble just because they are the ones who hold the positions that these alerts concern.)

Thank you in advance.

1 posted on 05/24/2023 7:46:17 PM PDT by CheshireTheCat
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies ]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-45 next last
To: CheshireTheCat

Very simple, you can, and likely will get fired.


2 posted on 05/24/2023 7:47:43 PM PDT by Reno89519 (Donald Tantrum? No Thank You. We Can Do Better!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat
It is best not to communicate with women in a work environment.

3 posted on 05/24/2023 7:50:32 PM PDT by Right_Wing_Madman
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

Sounds very minor given rulz in the past, but in these daze it’s MAJOR.

The chicklet is obviously a victim and needs to have HR vindicate her ridiculous complaint.

[And you think the Legal System is broken...]


4 posted on 05/24/2023 7:52:01 PM PDT by Paladin2
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

North Carolina is an employee at will state. So unless there’s something in your employee handbook about progressive discipline, the company has the right to fire you for good reason bad reason for no reason at all as long as it’s not related to race, sex, national origin, gender, religion, etc. Commenting on a woman’s looks in today’s business world is an absolute no-no. I advise clients on these issues all the time. If I were advising the company in this matter, I would probably just have them give you a verbal counseling/warning. But if it’s a large corporation, they might pull the trigger and fire you. Also, you have no case for retaliation. Good luck!


5 posted on 05/24/2023 7:53:34 PM PDT by CWW (Pray for God's Protection!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

Most likely he is already fired and hasn’t gotten the notice yet. Companies are scared to death of lawsuits over sexual harassment. If he does manage to keep his job, they are going to make his life a living hell in that company until he quits. HR departments are full of woke petty tyrants with BS degrees that HATE men. And she has already shown her vindictiveness so this won’t be the last time she lodges a complaint.


6 posted on 05/24/2023 7:55:49 PM PDT by Organic Panic (Democrats. Memories as short as Joe Biden's eyes)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat
Helping a woman in a work environment isn't a good idea - - same for sexual weirdos or people in 'grievance groups'. If they don't get what they want they'll blame YOU.

The exception?

When promoting people ONLY choose based on merit... the best qualited man, woman, sexual weirdo or person of grievance group - whoever's best at what the job requires...

8 posted on 05/24/2023 8:00:40 PM PDT by GOPJ (American companies: YOUR Ad Agency needs to look like America NOT like a San Francisco Gay bathhouse)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

Just another reason to completely ignore women in the workplace.

It can only get you into trouble.


11 posted on 05/24/2023 8:02:53 PM PDT by DarrellZero
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

The thread is confusing since you brought in your friend in a similar situation.
Trying to ignore that, as a female, you have a pretty solid shield there. If she’s trying to paint you as a lesbian harasser, you’re doubly shielded.
I’m guessing you don’t have a union to represent you, but don’t say ANYTHING in the hearing a couple of days from now. If the finding is damaging to your career, consult a lawyer, but DON’T SAY ANYTHING!!!
Best of luck, and if you think of it, FReepmail me with what happened.


13 posted on 05/24/2023 8:03:15 PM PDT by End Times Sentinel (In the conflict between the stone and the stream, the stream will always prevail.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

As unfortunate as it is, he needs to start looking for a new job. He is totally screwed in the world of Corporate HR


14 posted on 05/24/2023 8:03:34 PM PDT by gas_dr (Conditions of Socratic debate: Intelligence, Candor, and Good Will)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

Sounds like E. Jean Carroll part three, not two because Carroll’s planning to take action on things Trump said after the first verdict.


18 posted on 05/24/2023 8:08:51 PM PDT by mass55th ("Courage is being scared to death, but saddling up anyway." ~~ John Wayne )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

My comment: I too work for banks. I refuse to discuss anything aside from work other than 1) my dog 2) hiking which I enjoy or 3) the weather.

I really don’t care if people think I have no life or am shallow or am a robot or whatever. I simply will not take the chance of having my career negatively impacted by something like this.

When Covid came along and they forced me to work from home, I discovered how much I love it. Now there is utterly no reason to ever chit chat with female colleagues and no contact with HR - that’s exactly how I want it.


21 posted on 05/24/2023 8:14:07 PM PDT by FLT-bird
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

In one text, I said she was “pretty and young”.

How was that known?


22 posted on 05/24/2023 8:14:54 PM PDT by Brian Griffin
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

“She filed a complaint two days ago against me with HR. We last texted 3 months ago”

Such timing would make it more likely that non-contact was the cause of her uncomfort and not contact.


24 posted on 05/24/2023 8:17:05 PM PDT by Brian Griffin
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

I went through a nightmare like this many years ago. I’d go hardcore on HR, let them know they will get sued if this goes further.

Even the trivial is now serious.


26 posted on 05/24/2023 8:18:23 PM PDT by DaxtonBrown (away.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

The first time that a woman complains about making her uncomfortable should be the last time you have any deal things with her. You are better off to send a woman subordinate, if you are able, to deal with her. If you must deal with her, stick with yes or no answers only. No friendly conversations.


29 posted on 05/24/2023 8:20:44 PM PDT by Jonty30 (If liberals were truth tellers, they'd call themselves literals. )
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

Does the person involved have a contract, or is a member of a union? If either is true, then the person has considerable protection. He might well weather the storm.

But if not, then the person is basically an at-will employee, and can be fired for any reason. Or for no reason at all.

In that latter case, it all depends on how much the person needs the job. If his family depends on his income, then there is no shame in groveling (for the lack of a better word). And I’m quite serious about this. It’s a woke world. You’ve got to pick your hill to die on. And this isn’t it.

Side story: I once overheard an older co-worker of mine talk to a new hire. “Here’s the most important phrase to use here,” the old guy said. “It’s ‘I’m sorry. It will never happen again.’”

I was a bit taken aback by that. But now I know that the old guy was correct. 100% correct. You can win just by surviving.


32 posted on 05/24/2023 8:25:32 PM PDT by Leaning Right (The steal is real.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

Alliances

Character alliances

Witnesses

The buddy system

Video tape


33 posted on 05/24/2023 8:26:27 PM PDT by Varsity Flight ( "War by🙏🙏 the prophesies set before you." I Timothy 1:18. Nazarite prayer warriors. 10.5.6.5)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat
In one text, I said she was "pretty and young".

Never a good idea to comment on a co-worker's appearance or age, either negatively or positively. May not be fair, but it's a fact.
34 posted on 05/24/2023 8:26:54 PM PDT by AnotherUnixGeek
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

In one text, I said she was “pretty and young”.

yer done...


35 posted on 05/24/2023 8:27:38 PM PDT by Chode (there is no fall back position, there's no rally point, there is no LZ... we're on our own. #FJB)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]

To: CheshireTheCat

Keep a detailed diary; maintain a system of secure copies.

Keep living. Eat right. Get exercise. Sleep right.

Pray.


36 posted on 05/24/2023 8:29:23 PM PDT by linMcHlp
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies ]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-45 next last

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article


FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson