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Pfizer Introduces New Mascot 'Clotty'
Babylon Bee ^ | January 25th, 2023 | unattributed

Posted on 01/25/2023 11:30:59 AM PST by shadowlands1960

NEW YORK, NY — Pharmaceutical giant Pfizer has unveiled their new mascot, an adorable glob of platelets who goes by the name "Clotty".

"See? Blood clots aren't scary!" said Pfizer CEO Albert Bourla as a smiling Clotty danced onto the stage. "Welcome to Pfizer, Clotty! Let's get one of these little guys into every home in America!"

While Pfizer initially pushed back against evidence tying the vaccine to blood clots, the company has decided to instead embrace it. "We are so excited for Clotty to help us put a friendly face on heart attacks and strokes," said Pfizer CEO Albert Bourla. "Every new COVID booster will now come with a plush Clotty doll you can take to the hospital when you inevitably get admitted with a massive embolus. You'll love squeezing Clotty while they wheel you into the cath lab! Thanks, Clotty!"

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Health/Medicine; Humor; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: babylonbee
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To: shadowlands1960
At publishing time, Donald Trump had reportedly added Clotty to his list of potential running mates.

It’s funny ‘cause it’s true… 🤣

21 posted on 01/25/2023 12:22:28 PM PST by Magnatron
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To: shadowlands1960

Project Veritas
@Project_Veritas

Hi
@pfizer
- ready for round 3?

See you tonight at 8pm.
11:09 AM · Jan 25, 2023


22 posted on 01/25/2023 12:28:04 PM PST by mewzilla (We will never restore the republic if we don't first secure the ballot box.)
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To: mewzilla

James O’Keefe
@JamesOKeefeIII

Tonight’s Veritas release may blow up the internet.

8pm.
2:49 PM · Jan 25, 2023


23 posted on 01/25/2023 12:28:34 PM PST by mewzilla (We will never restore the republic if we don't first secure the ballot box.)
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To: shadowlands1960
The Alien 3 Clot Shot


24 posted on 01/25/2023 1:37:21 PM PST by conservativeimage (For the love of life we’ll defeat this. They may tear us down but we'll go down fighting. Won't we?)
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To: Magnatron

Ooh. That’ll leave a mark!


25 posted on 01/25/2023 3:48:47 PM PST by griswold3 (Truth, Beauty and Goodness )
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To: ConservativeMind

26 posted on 01/25/2023 3:57:39 PM PST by 4Liberty (Kamala’s relatives owned slaves.)
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To: 4Liberty

An ordinary, far-suburbs doctor of my acquaintance said they were showing porn movies in the evenings at some of the expense-paid “medical conferences” he was gifted with in locations like Las Vegas and Hawaii.


27 posted on 01/25/2023 5:33:25 PM PST by Albion Wilde ("There is no good government at all & none possible."--Mark Twain)
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