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Psaki: "Inflation Is Good for America" [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 16 May 2021 | John Semmens

Posted on 05/14/2021 11:32:31 PM PDT by John Semmens

Indications that inflation is rising is roiling markets and unnerving consumers who must pay unexpectedly higher prices for basic necessities. Gasoline prices, for example, are up nearly 50% from a year ago. Presidential Press Secretary Jen Psaki pooh-poohed concerns, calling them "unnecessary fretting. Rising prices are a positive in so many ways."

"Take the jump in gasoline prices," she suggested. "This is not an unplanned phenomenon. It is the President's policy to wean the country off of fossil fuels. To accomplish this it is necessary to make gasoline unaffordable for as many drivers as we can. The Colonial Pipeline hacking attack wasn't explicitly planned by the Biden Administration, but it helps further our goal. Remember, one of the first things the President did when he took office was to cancel the Keystone Pipeline. And just the other day we saw Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer take emergency action to block fuels coming into our country from Canada. This is all a sign that we are succeeding."

"On a broader front, let's not forget that inflation helps erode the value of money," Psaki pointed out. "As the largest debtor in the country the federal government comes out ahead when it can pay back debt in cheaper dollars. Other big debtors like state governments and corporations similarly benefit. Who doesn't benefit? The misers who buy bonds. The biggest purchasers of bonds are pension funds who see the interest extracted from borrowers as a way to divert money to the unproductive retired segment of the population. These retirees don't need this money. Social Security and Medicare will take care of their legitimate needs. What I'm saying is that basically, inflation redirects money from the sterile purpose of sustaining an idle segment of society to the dynamic purpose of ensuring that government has a bigger share of the country's resources so it can do more good for the whole population."

In related news, Secretary of the Department of Energy Jennifer Granholm asserted that "those suffering from rising gasoline costs have only themselves to blame. If you drive an electric car you are immune to the problems of rising gas costs or limited supply when a pipeline fails or is shut down by government order. Once everyone takes the President's intent to outlaw fossil fuel in this country seriously the disruptions of the past and present will just be old memories."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,437001.new.html#new


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: debt; inflation; pensions; psaki; satire

1 posted on 05/14/2021 11:32:31 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: #1CTYankee; 12Gauge687; 14erClimb; 21twelve; 1raider1; 2nd Bn, 11th Mar; 3D-JOY; 43north; ...

ping


2 posted on 05/14/2021 11:33:28 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

inflation is infrastructure


3 posted on 05/15/2021 1:04:08 AM PDT by teacherwoes (I am Philip Nolan )
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To: John Semmens

She is that stupid.


4 posted on 05/15/2021 1:35:54 AM PDT by shanover (...To disarm the people is the best and most effectual way to enslave them.-S.Adams)
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To: John Semmens

Excellent again.


5 posted on 05/15/2021 3:56:59 AM PDT by xzins (Retired US Army chaplain. Support our troops by praying for their victory. )
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To: John Semmens

Sir, you are d@mn near a genius. Kudos once again.


6 posted on 05/15/2021 4:17:25 AM PDT by Hardastarboard (Don't wish your enemy ill; plan it.)
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To: John Semmens

I remember “Jimmy Carter” on SNL in the late ‘70s saying “Inflation is your friend. Eventually, we will all be millionaires”.


7 posted on 05/15/2021 5:50:22 AM PDT by DuncanWaring (The Lord uses the good ones; the bad ones use the Lord.)
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To: John Semmens

With the bunch we have running around D.C. these days, it’s hard to point out the biggest idiot. This is billed as semi-news & semi-satire. Which is & which isn’t?


8 posted on 05/15/2021 8:31:50 AM PDT by oldtech
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To: John Semmens

Why do you resort to satire?

Just write the truth and stay factual, that’s already beyond belief!

Corona virus and how it’s helping humanity curb CO2 production.

Corona virus and how it’s helping mother earth deal with the pesky humans and over population.

Corona virus and why we need more abortions. The WHO actually no shit used Covid as an argument to increase abortion funding.

You don’t need satire-


9 posted on 05/15/2021 8:38:27 AM PDT by Red6
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To: Red6

Many good people are already writing straight news on and criticism of tyranny.

By taking the known truth and adding the hidden and unspoken thinking of our would-be overlords I believe I can help some to better understand what’s going on.


10 posted on 05/15/2021 11:19:56 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
Another excellent piece. Keep 'em coming.

> ...adding the hidden and unspoken thinking of our would-be overlords...

THIS ^^

That's exactly it, John. Your writing hits home precisely because it delivers the subtext, their "between the lines" messages, their real intentions.

11 posted on 05/15/2021 12:55:20 PM PDT by dayglored ("Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government.")
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