THORAZINE is back!
Posted on 01/20/2021 7:49:32 PM PST by dynachrome
Kamala Harris has said she still plans to be sworn in on a Bible, but during rehearsal they were having trouble getting her to touch one without hissing and vomiting with her head spinning around like a lawn sprinkler.
(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Joe Biden has announced his plan to be sworn in on his favorite text: a copy of The Communist Manifesto by Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels.
“I will do my duty to this country and swear on this book that represents the guiding principles of my party,” Biden said in a speech, every word coming out with the utmost effort and with the help of a powerful concoction of drugs. “For as long as I am your president, whether that is 8 years, 4 years, or less than 24 hours, I will uphold my oath made on this sacred text.”
Not every president has been sworn in on the Bible, with Barack Obama being sworn in on a copy of one of his memoirs and George W. Bush being sworn in on a VHS copy of Delta Force. Still, some are criticizing the choice, calling it “anti-American” and “a clear sign of his support for socialism.” These people have had their Twitter accounts deleted for being crazy conspiracy theorists.
Kamala Harris has said she still plans to be sworn in on a Bible, but during rehearsal they were having trouble getting her to touch one without hissing and vomiting with her head spinning around like a lawn sprinkler.
I know it is a parody site but it hits close to home. I’m already in my mid 50s so my life is effectively over but i worry about the country that my children and their children will inherit.
That’s it! I want a Biden Lawn Gnome being sworn in, fraudulent votes from swing states budging from his pockets and from under his pointy hat!
Bulging....
For parody to be sucessful, it must be built upon an element of truth.- El Rushbo
What? You don’t believe ol’ kameltoe would puke green pea soup when presented with a Bible?
ROTFLMAO! 🤣
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I just assumed she would burst into flames by simply being in the presence of a Bible.
This piece of satire is just silly.
Everyone knows that he was sworn in on his personal copy of Mao’s Little Red Book.
I thought they were going to use “The Anarchist Cookbook”. My bad.
Hey, can they substitute “Rules for Radicals” by Saul Alinsky? Why not? They’ve been following it for decades.
THORAZINE is back!
We’re told the ghost of Abraham Lincoln still haunts the halls of the White House.
Abraham Lincoln, “Honest Abe,” HONEST!
What if (Dr.) Jill Biden runs into “Honest Abe” and he says “I know what you and your corrupt spouse did.”
And it happens again and again, every evening around 9 o’clock.
There’s enough paranoia in the Biden household to drive them both nuts.
Ok, I’m a former Marine - no skydiving? I also worked as a logger in my younger days, so no dropping trees? I’m in my early 50’s, guess I should say TTFN 😁😁
I am impressed—you are definitely gonna be fine—just stick with the stuff you know!
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