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Superman Renounces U.S. Citizenship
The Constitution Club ^ | 04-28-11 | The Rat

Posted on 04/28/2011 8:44:58 PM PDT by TheConservativeCitizen

Holy crap Batman, what’s up with Superman? It sounds like truth, justice, and the American way just don’t get it for your Kryptonian pal anymore. What happened?

Yes citizens of Metropolis, it’s a dark day indeed. As unthinkable as it sounds, your super- hero is fed up with America and has renounced his U.S. citizenship. How can this be, you ask?

It seems that Superman dropped in on a Tehran demonstration to stand with non-violent protestors against the Iranian regime. This not only ticked off the President’s national security advisor; the mullahs weren’t too happy either. Following a dress-down from the American government, the Man of Steel renounced his American citizenship at the United Nations the next day. (Hmm…you don’t suppose the Man of Awesomeness would follow suit, do you?)

Claiming that he was not abandoning his American values, Superman explained that he’s “only trying to implement them on a larger scale” and divorcing himself from the “political complexities of nationalism.” (This is sounding more and more familiar the farther we go.)

The Man of Steel said that he has been “thinking too small,” and that he is “too connected with the world” to limit himself to a singular national identity. As an alien born on another planet, after all, he “can’t help but see the bigger picture.” (BINGO, RAT’S GOT IT!)

Sources close to Superman indicate that the presidency of Barack Obama was the final motivation the Man of Steel needed to pull the trigger. As is the case with Obama, Superman finally realized that he is “larger than America – a true citizen of the world.”

Barack Hussein Obama can only dream.

*

The Rat also heard that Superman was fed up with the incessant questions about his birth certificate.


TOPICS: History; Humor; Politics; Society
KEYWORDS: citizenship; superman; tehran; un
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1 posted on 04/28/2011 8:45:00 PM PDT by TheConservativeCitizen
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

Time to kill Superman.


2 posted on 04/28/2011 8:55:25 PM PDT by BigCinBigD (Northern flags in South winds flutter...)
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

Where’s the kryptonite when you really need it...?


3 posted on 04/28/2011 9:03:44 PM PDT by freebilly
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

I renounce treason-man.


4 posted on 04/28/2011 9:04:41 PM PDT by Cringing Negativism Network (Birther on Board)
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

Is rhis your first trip to FR??

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/search?m=all;o=time;q=quick;s=superman


5 posted on 04/28/2011 9:05:39 PM PDT by ButThreeLeftsDo (FreeRepublic. Now, More Than Ever.)
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To: BigCinBigD

I say it’s time for Batman to kick his ass again, like he did in Dark Knight Returns (the comic).


6 posted on 04/28/2011 9:09:01 PM PDT by Clock King (Ellisworth Toohey was right: My head's gonna explode.)
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

7 posted on 04/28/2011 9:11:25 PM PDT by Vince Ferrer
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

Wow! Under Obummers watch he lost Egypt, the value of a dollar and Superman.


8 posted on 04/28/2011 9:13:44 PM PDT by Lazlo in PA (Now living in a newly minted Red State.)
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

"I want you to remember, Clark... in all the years to come... in your most private moments... I want you to remember my hand at your throat... I want you to remember the one man who beat you..." - Batman

9 posted on 04/28/2011 9:18:37 PM PDT by Vince Ferrer
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

...The jaded underworld is riding high...


10 posted on 04/28/2011 9:22:24 PM PDT by DGHoodini (Iran Azadi)
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To: DGHoodini

Lord, here comes the flood....

(One of the best albums, ever)


11 posted on 04/28/2011 9:25:47 PM PDT by dfwgator
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

Let me guess...for his next trick he will announce that he was really shtuping Lewis Lane.


12 posted on 04/28/2011 9:27:31 PM PDT by Trod Upon (Obama: Making the Carter malaise look good. Misery Index in 3...2...1)
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To: Trod Upon

That’s impossible, his jizz would blow a hole through her hoo-hoo.

It’s been theoretically proven.


13 posted on 04/28/2011 9:36:23 PM PDT by sinanju
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To: TheConservativeCitizen

Screw him.

Dear Lex Luthor:
Have your way with this traitor.

We don’t want him anymore.

Sincerely,

Vendome.


14 posted on 04/28/2011 9:42:11 PM PDT by Vendome ("Don't take life so seriously... You'll never live through it anyway")
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To: TheConservativeCitizen; sinanju

15 posted on 04/28/2011 9:43:13 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Que me amat, amet et canem meum)
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To: TheConservativeCitizen
Clark Kent is a reporter for the Daily Planet. Like all members of the MSM he has decided to denounce America.

He is hoping it will save his job and get him a position as a TV journalist.

16 posted on 04/28/2011 9:55:24 PM PDT by detective
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To: TheConservativeCitizen
he is “too connected with the world” to limit himself to a singular national identity

Maybe he will start following Islamic values like a lot of other Western nihilists and we'll see him smashing down churches and killing women who don't wear burquas in the next series.

17 posted on 04/28/2011 10:32:01 PM PDT by Opinionated Blowhard ("The time will come when Winter will ask you what you were doing all Summer" -- Henry Clay)
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To: TheConservativeCitizen; Lizavetta
The Man of Steel said that he has been “thinking too small,”

Cognitive dissonance. While Obaama is doubtless "small" (hung like a ...hamster), I think it'd be going too far to call him the "Man of Steel". (Steal, yes, as in National Debt; or wet noodle, as in Moochelle is *very* disappointed)

To quote FReeper Lizavetta for an Obaama haiku:

The wifey looks mad

Could it be that his johnson

Came from his white side?

And speaking of Teh One as Superman -- why doesn't anyone just bring a hunk of Kryptonite to his next fundraiser?

Cheers!

18 posted on 04/28/2011 10:54:08 PM PDT by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change without notice.)
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To: sinanju; Trod Upon
Your wish is my command:

Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex by Larry Niven

Cheers!

19 posted on 04/28/2011 10:57:21 PM PDT by grey_whiskers (The opinions are solely those of the author and are subject to change without notice.)
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To: grey_whiskers

OH that is a funny Haiku!!! I have done some, too:

Birthers and Obots
We spell Moron with an “A”
They worship the “O”

and my wine one:

Franzia wine rocks!
In its little cardboard box.
Replenish your stocks!!!


20 posted on 04/28/2011 10:58:23 PM PDT by Squeeky ("Truth is so rare that it is delightful to tell it. " Emily Dickinson)
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