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Meatloaf's Surprise: Gas to Run Out; Singer Bursts in Response
Feed Your ADHD ^ | 12/16/2008 | Dr. Dave

Posted on 12/16/2008 6:55:55 PM PST by bloodmeridian

Outdated rock ‘n roll singer Meatloaf exploded Tuesday after learning he could get better gas mileage by losing weight.

“You’re kidding me?” he said when learning of a University of Illinois study that concluded America will be out of fuel by the end of 2020 if fat people don’t exercise, lose weight, and become generally miserable because they’re no longer fat and content. [Full disclosure: Your stupid narrator is fat and content.]

“Hell, if I had known I could burn more fossil fuels by eating another hamburger a day, I would have done it earlier. But it’s never too late to get fatter!” Meatloaf said, plodding across the street to a McDonald’s.

The singer, famous for albums he didn’t write, such as Bat out of Hell, Bat out of Hell II, and Bat out of Hell III (not that his handlers were obsessed with small rabid nocturnal cave-dwelling creatures, or anything), was later taken to a nearby hospital shortly after hearing the news, because his stomach burst. A TV crew captured this video of the incident:

(MR. CREOSOTE ALERT)

(Excerpt) Read more at feedyouradhd.blogspot.com ...


TOPICS: Humor; Miscellaneous; Music/Entertainment; Society
KEYWORDS: gasconsumptionstudy; meatloaf; mrcreosote; satire; wasteoftime
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1 posted on 12/16/2008 6:55:56 PM PST by bloodmeridian
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To: bloodmeridian

Eet’s only waffer-theen!


2 posted on 12/16/2008 6:58:21 PM PST by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (God helps those who help themselves. The government helps those who don't.)
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To: bloodmeridian

Did he really say this? Or is this satire?


3 posted on 12/16/2008 7:08:11 PM PST by RatsDawg
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To: RatsDawg

I think it’s a weak attempt at humor.


4 posted on 12/16/2008 7:09:57 PM PST by ClearCase_guy
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To: RatsDawg

nm! ha


5 posted on 12/16/2008 7:10:39 PM PST by RatsDawg
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To: bloodmeridian

And when the day is done and the sun goes down and the moon comes shining through

(*sreaming and squinching up*) Like a sinner before the gates of haven I’ll come crawling on back to you...

I don’t care who wrote bat out of hell...that was one kick-ass album and no one on earth could have performed it better than Meatloaf did

It was a real moment in music


6 posted on 12/16/2008 7:18:23 PM PST by 240B
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To: 240B

I’m partial to Rocky Horror Picture Show, but that’s just my warped sense of entertainment.


7 posted on 12/16/2008 7:20:13 PM PST by bloodmeridian (http://feedyouradhd.blogspot.com, http://badfrigginhair.blogspot.com)
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To: bloodmeridian
Eh. I'll give this a C.

For those interested: The inspiration for this piece of satire is an article from PhysOrg ("With increasing obesity, fuel consumption becomes weighty matter").

8 posted on 12/16/2008 7:22:09 PM PST by CE2949BB (Fight.)
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To: bloodmeridian

What ever happened to Saturday night?


9 posted on 12/16/2008 7:24:26 PM PST by usmcobra (Go ask Obama for your change, and don't bug me!)
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To: bloodmeridian

I wonder if anyone remembers ‘Americathon’, where MeatLoaf actually did battle with the last working car....


10 posted on 12/16/2008 7:28:44 PM PST by pvoce ('Good' sense and 'Common' sense are two entirely different concepts.)
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To: CE2949BB

Yep...if you can stomach the story, I eventually get to that link.


11 posted on 12/16/2008 7:28:49 PM PST by bloodmeridian (http://feedyouradhd.blogspot.com, http://badfrigginhair.blogspot.com)
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To: bloodmeridian

That was good too

Hey man, try that booh cd it is remarkable. It was produced by that Paul guy who did that SNL thing and then did that thing with that guy on TV


12 posted on 12/16/2008 7:29:43 PM PST by 240B
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To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers

I reject this as being disrespectfull of the near icon, that still sings his a$$ of, Meatloaf.

His small role in the beginning of “the Pick Of Destiny” (called a Cameo), starring Jack Black. Kicked a$$, he sounded great, and I ate it up, I reject the supposition that any person, as cool and talented as Meatloaf is, should be discarded.

I got a kick being entertained by a forgotten force of rock, and he did do well, and yes, in case you don’t know, he did a great job, followed by RJD, another rock icon.

But that my FRiends, is another story.


13 posted on 12/16/2008 7:30:15 PM PST by ChetNavVet (Build It, and they won't come!)
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To: 240B

There will never be another Marvin Lee Aday.

He is the king of teenage angst rock-opera.
[is that a genre? no? well, it should be]

I have *every freaking album* he ever put out...even ones you’ve *never* heard of....:))

*sigh*

I remember finding paradise by the dashboard light....:)


14 posted on 12/16/2008 7:33:41 PM PST by Salamander (Cursed with Second Sight.)
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To: 240B

To his credit, the lyricist, Jim Steinmen acquitted himself fairly well [if a bit whinier] on “Bad For Good”.


15 posted on 12/16/2008 7:35:40 PM PST by Salamander (Cursed with Second Sight.)
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To: ChetNavVet

The Mighty Meat still tours on:

http://www2.meatloaf.net/

[he should hook up with BOC and get in on the “On Tour Forever” t-shirt profits]

Wow.

I would love to see them playing a double headliner.

I’d OD.

:)


16 posted on 12/16/2008 7:40:07 PM PST by Salamander (Cursed with Second Sight.)
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To: Salamander

Yeah ... I know

You have to be in the 16-18 mind set to “get it”

But if the wife and kids are gone...and I’am in my underwear...all is forgiven (I hope?) LoL


17 posted on 12/16/2008 7:42:40 PM PST by 240B
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To: ZirconEncrustedTweezers

5 Little ones under 11

All but the 11 year old has the pukes tonight....so this is right on time. It is the only time that I have laughed since I have been home.

Thanks.

T


18 posted on 12/16/2008 7:51:34 PM PST by WomBom (I wonder if my gear is down? We would have touched by now.......Right?)
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To: 240B

Happily, I’ve managed to utterly disregard the reality of chronological progression so I’m *always* in a “17” state of mind....;-D

[and I CRANK that stuff when driving alone in the Yukon]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBZDTK9Yhko

Hell yeah!


19 posted on 12/16/2008 7:57:27 PM PST by Salamander (Cursed with Second Sight.)
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To: bloodmeridian

What kind of woman would name her kid Meatloaf?


20 posted on 12/16/2008 8:17:50 PM PST by fkabuckeyesrule (Na na na na na na na na hey ALAN good-bye!!!!!!!)
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