Posted on 08/12/2008 11:33:53 AM PDT by jmpmstr4u2
Dear Abby,
I am a crack dealer in Beaumont , Texas , who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Fort Worth . One of my sisters lives in Pflugerville and is married to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas . I have two brothers: one is currently serving a life sentence at Huntsville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview .. She is a part time 'working girl'.
All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiance and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her. Should I tell her about my cousin who supports Barack Obama for President?
Signed, Worried About My Reputation
hahahaaa!
Love that pic. :)
Thank YOU, Alamo-Girl !
I sent this one to a few folks via email, too !
:^D
I REALLY needed to read this today. I’d like one of those shirts as well. Thanks for the ping Meekie.
You bet!
Thank you!
Thanks for the ping.
thank you bump for ping Meeky!
Yes, I would definitely hide this very sad part of my family from my future spouse... lol
You bet.
LOL!
ROTFLOLOL!
“What a HOOT” is exactly how I would describe it! ;o)
Thanks for the ping and post!
hehehee! :^D
I shared it by sending to a few folks via my email, too!
I’m doing the same thing! lol
:^D
There is another one that recently circulated and landed
in my email inbox ...
- - - - - - - - - -
This is why we love Texans...
This is what I like about Texans; they get right to the point, and most of
the time what they say is correct. I sure agree with this one.
- - -
T. B. Bechtel, a part-time City Councilman from Midland, TX, was asked
on a local live radio talk show, just what he thought of the allegations of
torture of the Iraqi prisoners.
His reply prompted his ejection from the studio, but to thunderous
applause from the audience.
‘If hooking up an Iraqi prisoner’s balls to a car’s battery cables will
save one Texas GI’s life, then I have just three things to say,
Red is positive,
Black is negative,
Make sure his balls are wet.’
also found here:
http://www.intruderalert.com/cafe/index.cfm?page=topic&topicID=123884&start=41
about half-way down that page. :)
Another funny for ya !
I went to the US Patent Office trying to register some of my inventions. I went to the main desk to sign in and the lady at the desk had a form that had to be filled out. She wrote down my personal information and then asked me what I had invented. I said, “A folding bottle.” She said, “What do you call it?” “A Fottle.” “What else do you have?” “A folding carton.” “What is it called?” “A Farton.”
She snickered and said, “Those are silly names and one of them sounds kind of crude.” I was so upset about her comment that I grabbed the form and left the office without even telling her about my folding bucket.
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