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DUmmie FUnnies 12-06-07 ("I'm about to have a votergate orgasm!")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | December 6, 2004 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 12/06/2004 11:40:45 AM PST by PJ-Comix

Ohio certifies it electoral votes for Bush today and you would think that the DUmmies would be in the depths of Depression. But no! Take a look at this DUmmie THREAD where the DUmmies are haveing orgasms of delight over....just WHAT???? Nothing specific only some FEELING that vote fraud in Ohio will suddenly be proved and that states electoral votes and the election victory will be given to John Kerry. Let us now take an acid trip down Fantasy Lane with the DUmmies as they leap for joy even as their last hope is about to die out. As usual, the DUmmie Delusions are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, feeling as if he is sitting in an analyst's chair is in the [brackets]:

I'm about to have a votergate orgasm! Doesn't it seems like the stars are finally aligning and things are about to explode???

[Bev Harris must be tickling your V Spot.]

No matter what we find the courts will rule in favor of their new masters. Yes, we can prove to the world and anybody in the USA who will listen that the election was rigged and stolen, but this government decided the outcome months ago and will not allow such matters to divert it.

[Our court system has this strange little idiosyncrasy. They demand that you present evidence, not fantasy.]

We Don't need the governments approval. We don't NEED their allowance of it. We will accomplish our goals anyway. Cause we are DU. We are unstoppable. We will plow through any obstacles in our way. We WILL NOT give up. We WILL NOT give in. We WILL NOT let them get away with this.

[Yeah but you need your orderly's approval to even leave your ward.]

We wouldn't have to call 'smirking chimp boy' President for the next four years, and everyone will know why.

[Good question. WHY???? WHY are the DUmmies suddenly have votergasms on the very day that Ohio's electoral votes are certified for Bush? Thus far in this thread I've seen not a shred of evidence of vote fraud presented. Or perhaps you merely visualized your own reality of vote fraud.]

This is going to be a battle of increments and attrition. At no time do I expect a single telling blow to be landed.

[What about the blow that landed on your head?]

Slowly, a damning pattern is emerging in the public eye.

[Yes. Mass delusional insanity amongst the DUmmies.]

I'm fluctuating between this being just a really low point in American history and this being the beginning of the end of our nation. Gonna go buy some more gin now.

[May I recommend Thunderbird, Vintage 2004. Either that or antifreeze will do.]

We're starting to see a multitude of organizations trying to shut down the discussion. They are ramping it up to shut us down.

[Or, more likely, laugh you out of existence.]

There is a kind of "tipping point" that may make something happen fairly swiftly. If the entire Bushco regime begins to look just too too dirty entire networks will need to distance themselves in a real hurry - if only for classic market reasons.

[The tipping point of your rationality was already reached long, long ago...and in another galaxy.]

And slowly but slowly he and his personal band of "evil doers" will lose all trust of the people. It will be slow but it will be brutal. They have come so close to having it all, in fact they may still get away with it, but if they do not their downfall will be large and loud. The best part will be the total discrediting of each and every one of them and the fact that we can finally fix our system of election so that we can again really elect our leaders. I continue to have visions of orange jumpsuits, it is about the only thing that makes me smile these days.

[That smile will be wiped off your face once you see that the person wearing that jumpsuit is Bev Harris who will be frogwalked into jail for fraud.]

We are not out to sway the government. We are not out to try and convince them "oh pleaseeee, government, we know you did it, oh Pleasssssse admit you did something wrong and leave? Oh prettttty pleasseeeee government".... Not exactly what we are out to do I wouldn't think. No. We will not sway them, we will convict them. We will not ask them to leave, we will have authorities do it via handcuffs. We will not fail in our mission. We will not fail our democracy. So help us God.

[LOL! I nominate this post for entry into the Delusional Fantasy Wing of the DUFU Hall of Fame.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: crackheads; dummies; hippies; ohio; retards; scum
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To: freedumb2003

I'm thinking he's some college kid who just read a speech in class from some great hero such as Patton (who I'm sure would be considered a murdering war monger), and figured he's try it out on his sissy friends.

Mike


101 posted on 12/06/2004 5:37:51 PM PST by sydneycarton
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To: Chad Fairbanks

Thanks for your input... you're right, no way the boxes didn't go through extensive testing, and would it also not be possible to decipher the compiled code?

That affidavit looked like it was written by someone who got through community college Visual Basic class but no more than that...


102 posted on 12/06/2004 5:48:05 PM PST by Nataku X (For what shall it profit a man, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?)
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To: lonevoice
Why did the federal judge approve it (the Ohio recount)

That is the easy question. Because Ohio law permits it even though it means absolutely nothing.

Why did the Greens and Libertarians pay for it

Because they have some seriously brain dead leaders who were ready to throw their contributors money away and didn't understand the timing of the process in Ohio. They did not realize that it would take several weeks to count the provisional votes, at which point it would be too late to have a relevant recount. Now they are just throwing money away and wasting the time of voting officials in Ohio who will have to spend many hours of overtime during the holiday season to do this stupid task.

I consider myself a libertarian but the Party has gone nutso since 9-11.
103 posted on 12/06/2004 5:50:57 PM PST by cgbg
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To: PJ-Comix

When they say they lost because they were gamed by Diebold, do they mean Diebold made fraud harder?

When I hear dems whining about voter fraud and see that most every news story involving voter fraud involved dems...I mean, do they not read the news?

It's a little like making sense out of and M.C. Escher drawing.


104 posted on 12/06/2004 5:54:06 PM PST by Duke Nukum (When there is no room in Hell, the U.N. elect Bill Clinton as their president.)
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To: Inyokern
I have read the affadavit and I don't see any evidence of criminal activity here.

Making a claim to a third party that you want to steal votes is not a crime if you don't actually steal them.

The calmer Dummies realize this affadavit is worthless unless they can prove that the program was actually used in a real election.
105 posted on 12/06/2004 5:57:04 PM PST by cgbg
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To: berkeleybeej

Also notice that the last page with the seal and signature, if read independently, really has nothing at all to do with voting? I think DU'ers are being led on.


106 posted on 12/06/2004 6:13:35 PM PST by mjwise
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To: PJ-Comix
How about Rosie O'Donnell as Bev Harris. And Christopher Lloyd as Mr. 'I'm about to have a votergate orgasm! Doesn't it seems like the stars are finally aligning and things are about to explode???'
107 posted on 12/06/2004 6:18:57 PM PST by ml1954
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To: mjwise
Also notice that the last page with the seal and signature, if read independently, really has nothing at all to do with voting? I think DU'ers are being led on.

You're right about the last page having nothing to do with voting. And the tone and sentence structure seem quite unlike the first pages.

Oh, BTW, DU/Brad/Curtis are reporting that Curtis' dog has been killed. I guess the mean ol' Republican dog-killers are out in force. Guess the Repub's kill dogs and the Dem kill cats.

108 posted on 12/06/2004 6:26:00 PM PST by berkeleybeej
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To: randog
Yes. Nothing could stop these 10 thousand or so idiots from soiling themselves. :-)
109 posted on 12/06/2004 6:40:19 PM PST by planekT
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To: berkeleybeej
Who sez DUmmies don't have a sense of humor?

trumad Mon Dec-06-04 09:37 PM

Original message

This just in: Curtis' Parakeet Has Been Killed.

F*****g thing wouldn't sing!

Goodnight everybody!

110 posted on 12/06/2004 6:51:48 PM PST by berkeleybeej
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To: Nakatu X

Oh, I'm sure the code could be decompiled, reverse engineered, or otherwise gotten to in some way... ;0)


111 posted on 12/06/2004 7:50:42 PM PST by Chad Fairbanks ('Hate' is just a special kind of Love we give to people who suck.)
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To: PJ-Comix; All

[Bev Harris must be tickling your V Spot.]
===
LMAO!


112 posted on 12/06/2004 8:10:48 PM PST by JLO
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To: Chad Fairbanks
DUers are morons...BUT YOU REPEAT YOURSELF!
113 posted on 12/06/2004 8:57:55 PM PST by luvie (WE DID NOT WAVER; WE DID NOT TIRE; WE DID NOT FALTER; AND WE DID NOT FAIL!! GWB ROCKS!!!!!!!!)
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To: PJ-Comix; freedumb2003; RandallFlagg; SandyInSeattle; Trippin

P.J., how could you have overlooked Patsy Stone's "The Perfect Storm" added to DU homepage on Sunday 5 December, 2004 at 9:47 am?

Surely a DU thread that includes Jenna Bush shaking her green shoe to let the Rovians know it's time to switch Kerry votes to Bush deserves consideration for the Dummie Funnies' Hall of Fame.

The Perfect Storm..."This is it. I feel it."

"I was one of the first to wonder why Kerry conceded. ...I didn't see it. But then I did. ...Why wouldn't he concede?...This was brilliant."

"I am praying and trying to keep the faith, and sooooo anticipating the storm..."

"I, myself, live for the storm."

"They have yet to sense the dark clouds of the massive left-wing conspiracy looming just over the horizon to uproot the Shrubbery and weeds....We will know them when they start screaming."

"The storm is coming. There is no doubt. We will bring the media along kicking and screaming if need be."

"Bush f...ed over a fellow Bonesman. He knows it's on the way."

"You are so right, the storm is coming. I think it will be spectacular."

"A perfect storm indeed! I just wish I knew now which way the storm would blow....I"m thinking now that either it's going to be big-time arrests, indictments, Diebold offices impounded, precincts put under law-enforcement lock-down, etc., or else the Holy Theocratic Fourth Reich is now in effect."

It took a while but they finally realized at DU that the video taken of the Bush family at the White House was "unprecedented." It wasn't a press conference, so why invite the cameras in? Then someone at DU remembered Jenna Bush jiggling her foot encased in a bright Green Shoe and minutes later the exit polls favoring Kerry disappeared.

"I wonder if any observer anywhere saw any election official make an odd, and brief trip to the TV set during the evening."

I am amazed that the habitues of DU who are so focused on the details of this election night video did not consider the possibility that Jenna's Green Shoe was just to distract viewers from the real signal to steal the election...Barney's apparently innocent refusal to respond to Bush family members calling him put the vote switchers on notice. Election officials did not have to make "odd, brief trips to the TV set." The chips Rove had installed in their ears picked up the final, decisive signal: Barney backing up to a sub-sonic transmitter and farting "Texas Uber Alles."

Good dog.


114 posted on 12/06/2004 9:12:49 PM PST by Barset
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To: NonLinear
And the font changes on the last page too. Did this come from Dan Rather?

So does the thrust of the affidavit. Suddenly it is all about espionage and illegal alien Chinese.

115 posted on 12/06/2004 9:14:31 PM PST by Swordmaker (Tagline now open, please ring bell.)
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To: PJ-Comix
Has anybody here ever read "The Proud Tower", by Barbera Tuchman? Great book. It's about the 30 years that led up to World War I. If you like history, I recommend it.

One of my favorite chapters in the book is about the Anarchist movement of the day. Reading this DUmmie rant reminded me of it. These people were completely delusional, nothing but bitter loners. They didn't know how to affect any kind of change, and simply spoke of "the propaganda of the deed", which meant bombing buildings and killing people, and that somehow this would cause a popular uprising of the working classes, leading to the dawning of a New Age of Man.

They never explained how this might occur, they just had faith in the "rightness" of their cause.

Which just goes to show: times change, people don't.

116 posted on 12/06/2004 9:39:01 PM PST by THX 1138
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To: Shryke

The DU thread reminds me of a line from the enigmatic Emperor Kosh of "Babylon-5":

"The Avalanche has started... It is too late for the pebbles to vote."

Nice scream, Shryke!

Jack.


117 posted on 12/06/2004 9:48:20 PM PST by Jack Deth (When In Doubt.... Empty The Magazine!)
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To: pitbully
The republican party will NEVER recover from this mistake.
Once the mainstream US accepts the facts of what occurred in the 2000 and 2004 elections, the republicans will forever lose credibility, with everybody except for the most fanatical religious zealots. Then, progressives will finally have their day in the sun...and it will be glorious. I can't wait.

I see it coming.

Can almost smell it, the fear of the right that their jig is up.

118 posted on 12/06/2004 9:57:21 PM PST by granite (WE WON FAIR AND SQUARE, GET OVER IT DUMMIES!!!)
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To: PJ-Comix

We Don't need the governments approval. We don't NEED their allowance of it. We will accomplish our goals anyway. Cause we are DU. We are unstoppable. We will plow through any obstacles in our way. We WILL NOT give up. We WILL NOT give in. We WILL NOT let them get away with this.




ahh where to start on this one?

You are DU? NO WAY!?!?! You are unstoppable? You mean your senate leader DIDN'T lose on November the 2nd? You mean your Presidential candidate DIDN'T lose? Unstoppable means you would have won...stupid DUmmies...

These people need to up their meds.....


119 posted on 12/06/2004 10:16:11 PM PST by MikefromOhio (32 days until I can leave Iraq for good....)
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To: Inyokern

Good catch, Inyokern. And very interesting reading.


120 posted on 12/06/2004 11:24:34 PM PST by A Jovial Cad ("I had no shoes and I complained, until I saw a man who had no feet.")
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