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How Our Messed-Up Dating Culture Leads to Loneliness, Anger and Donald Trump
The New York Times ^ | Nov 30, 2024 12:00 PM | Sarah Bernstein

Posted on 11/30/2024 1:22:00 PM PST by E. Pluribus Unum

Joe Rogan. Elon Musk. Representatives of bro culture are on the ascent, bringing with them an army of disaffected young men. But where did they come from? Many argue that a generation of men are resentful because they have fallen behind women in work and school. I believe this shift would not have been so destabilizing were it not for the fact that our society still has one glass-slippered foot in the world of Cinderella.

Hundreds of years after the Brothers Grimm published their version of that classic rags-to-riches story, our cultural narratives still reflect the idea that a woman’s status can be elevated by marrying a more successful man — and a man’s diminished by pairing with a more successful woman. Now that women are pulling ahead, the fairy tale has become increasingly unattainable. This development is causing both men and women to backslide to old gender stereotypes and creating a hostile division between them that provides fuel for the exploding manosphere. With so much turmoil in our collective love lives, it’s little wonder Americans are experiencing surging loneliness, declining birthrates and — as evidenced by Donald Trump’s popularity with young men — a cascade of resentment that threatens to reshape our democracy.

When we think of Prince Charming, most of us probably picture a Disney figure with golden epaulets and great hair. In the Brothers Grimm version of “Cinderella,” he is called simply “the prince,” and neither his looks nor his personality receive even a passing mention. In fact, we learn nothing about him except for the only thing that matters: He has the resources to give Cinderella a far better life than the one she is currently living. Throughout much of Western literature, this...

(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: abortion; abstinence; brothersgrimm; celibacy; cinderella; dating; karenocracy; manosphere; mem; mgtow; monogamy; newyorkslimes; pua; redpill; sarahbernstein; tds; thekarenocracy; trump; women
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Relationship skills need to be taught and learned.


41 posted on 11/30/2024 3:17:02 PM PST by Brian Griffin
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To: yesthatjallen

Another thing — divorced men tend to remarry; divorced women - not so much, especially if they’ve had children.

I saw a paper on the above topic some years ago — as the divorce rate has gone up, so has the rape rate.


42 posted on 11/30/2024 3:27:23 PM PST by scrabblehack
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To: eyeamok
If you look around there are more single women 25 and up now than ever before in our history

That’s because they are all at least 35 pounds overweight and have visible tattoos and piercings.

43 posted on 11/30/2024 3:27:25 PM PST by HIDEK6 (God bless Donald Trump)
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To: ConservativeMind
Women seem wired to expect a husband to be of a better position than they are. Call it the “Cinderella Complex.”

"Cinderella Complex" or "Disney Complex" is a term that masks what's really happening - they're "Monkey Branching". They're swinging from branch to branch, always for a better mate. They keep trading up until inevitably they swing and miss or simply can't go any further. Then the try to go back and get together with someone they previously dumped. Men aren't playing that game anymore.

44 posted on 11/30/2024 3:27:36 PM PST by T.B. Yoits
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

“The worst thing that modern Feminism could have done for women was to allow them to reveal their true nature.” - Barbarossa


45 posted on 11/30/2024 3:30:01 PM PST by T.B. Yoits
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To: yesthatjallen
Successful women refuse to marry men who are less successful than they are. If more women keep earning more than men the pool of successful men will continue to shrink. Successful women will have fewer options. It's a "win"-lose prospect.

They're more likely to end up like Condoleezza Rice. A "successful" lady who has never gotten married.

But if we want our civilization to prosperity, we shouldn't be encouraging that kind of thing.

46 posted on 11/30/2024 3:37:15 PM PST by MinorityRepublican
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To: bigbob

She is.

Sarah Bernstein. Jewish-Canadian Feminist writer.


47 posted on 11/30/2024 3:38:19 PM PST by Alas Babylon! (Repeal the Patriot Act; Abolish the DHS; reform FBI top to bottom!)
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To: eyeamok

Guess they needed that bike after all!

48 posted on 11/30/2024 3:40:58 PM PST by Alas Babylon! (Repeal the Patriot Act; Abolish the DHS; reform FBI top to bottom!)
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To: MinorityRepublican
No blame biology. Women are hard wired to see a successful male as desirable.
49 posted on 11/30/2024 3:42:30 PM PST by Varda
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To: Varda
No blame biology. Women are hard wired to see a successful male as desirable.

Orthodox Jews, Amish, Muslims, etc are not having issues with birth rates.

50 posted on 11/30/2024 3:44:03 PM PST by MinorityRepublican
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To: ConservativeMind
Women seem wired to expect a husband to be of a better position than they are. Call it the “Cinderella Complex.”

Better to call it the "Children Complex". Women get married in order to have children. Even though they are successful enough to support themselves or even themselves and a spouse they expect when they have children that the husband will have to pick up their share of finances. Kids are expensive and if something goes wrong medically the costs can go through the roof.

Now you will occasionally have a highly charged women who wants a house husband who will take care of the children while she works outside the home but that is a outside the norm.

The more common way is she works until the kids arrive and then, if they have the money which is dependent on having a successful husband, she stays home to raise the children until they are all of school age when she returns to work part time.

Taking this break right at the time when you are making the most strides in your career is costly in terms of not only your current but future earnings. So, once again, successful husband is necessary.

51 posted on 11/30/2024 3:44:38 PM PST by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Not my circus. Not my monkeys. But I can pick out the clowns at 100 yards.)
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

bruce jenner and the freak show ruined dating culture...


52 posted on 11/30/2024 3:47:58 PM PST by heavy metal (smiling improves your face value and makes people wonder what the hell you're up to... 😁)
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To: MinorityRepublican
Actually they are.

Birth rate is declining even there.

It was at a higher level to start so the decline from 15 children to 8 is less noticeable but it is there.

53 posted on 11/30/2024 3:48:13 PM PST by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Not my circus. Not my monkeys. But I can pick out the clowns at 100 yards.)
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To: MinorityRepublican

Those aren’t the people fighting against reality. That’s what this author is doing. Women who choose their own mates are going to be attracted to the most successful male they can get.


54 posted on 11/30/2024 3:49:02 PM PST by Varda
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear
It was at a higher level to start so the decline from 15 children to 8 is less noticeable but it is there.

Still high.

55 posted on 11/30/2024 3:49:10 PM PST by MinorityRepublican
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To: Varda
Women who choose their own mates are going to be attracted to the most successful male they can get.

We get to "shape" our culture.

If we fail to reproduce, we will be replaced by a civilization with a higher birthrate.

Muslims may end up replacing us.

56 posted on 11/30/2024 3:50:25 PM PST by MinorityRepublican
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To: MinorityRepublican
But declining.

As it is declining all over the world and in all cultures.

Which is a problem.

57 posted on 11/30/2024 3:52:51 PM PST by Harmless Teddy Bear ( Not my circus. Not my monkeys. But I can pick out the clowns at 100 yards.)
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To: Lazamataz

I think you posted an image of a different Sarah Bernstein and that the NYT opinion author is this lady:

https://www.tiktok.com/@nytopinion/video/7358169123517517099


58 posted on 11/30/2024 3:54:01 PM PST by af_vet_1981 ( The bus came by and I got on, That's when it all began)
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To: MinorityRepublican

No doubt and a big problem is that our culture values things too much. . We encourage the young to pursue jobs not family. The average women’s fertility starts to decline at age 25. Most people get married after that age. It’s a recipe for extinction. We will get replaced by people who don’t do that (like Muslims).


59 posted on 11/30/2024 3:57:06 PM PST by Varda
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To: Varda
We will get replaced by people who don’t do that (like Muslims).

And it'll happen sooner than we'll think. Just take a look at the UK. Maybe 2 or 3 generations.

60 posted on 11/30/2024 3:59:45 PM PST by MinorityRepublican
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