Posted on 02/13/2024 7:21:59 AM PST by OneVike
This is a light hearted post to make you think. Remember, the more you know, the more you know you don't know. Take the American English language for instance. It is without a doubt the most confusing language on the planet. Ask anyone from around the world and they will tell you that the American English language is one of the most difficult to grasp and comprehend. When I consider how difficult it can be to understand our language, I am reminded of Albert Einstein, who just happened to be one of the most intelligent men to have ever lived. Well this is what he had to say about,
Well, let s take a look at the reasons American English is probably the most difficult language to master.
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
21) The plural of mouse is mice. The plural of house is ....? The plural of spouse is ....?
22) We eat what we can and what we can't, we can.
Let's face it - English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England or French fries in France. Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth, beeth? One goose, 2 geese? So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which, an alarm goes off by going on.
English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
PS. - Why doesn't 'Buick' rhyme with 'quick' ?
You lovers of the English language might enjoy this. There is a two-letter word that perhaps has more meanings than any other two-letter word, and that is 'UP.
It's easy to understand UP meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake UP? At a meeting, why does a topic come UP? Why do we speak UP and why are the officers UP for election and why is it UP to the secretary to write UP a report?
We call UP our friends. And we use it to brighten UP a room, polish UP the silver; we warm UP the leftovers and clean UP the kitchen. We lock UP the house and some guys fix UP the old car. At other times the little word has real special meaning. People stir UP trouble, line UP for tickets, work UP an appetite, and think UP excuses. To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed UP is special.
And this UP is confusing: A drain must be opened UP because it is stopped UP. We open UP a store in the morning but we close it UP at night.
We seem to be pretty mixed UP about UP!
To be knowledgeable about the proper uses of UP, look the word UP in the dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, it takes UP almost 1/4th of the page and can add UP to about thirty definitions. If you are UP to it, you might try building UP a list of the many ways UP is used. It will take UP a lot of your time, but if you don't give UP, you may wind UP with a hundred or more. When it threatens to rain, we say it is clouding UP. When the sun comes out we say it is clearing UP.
When it rains, it wets the earth and often messes things UP.
When it doesn't rain for awhile, things dry UP . One could go on and on, but I'll wrap it UP for now my time is UP, so ... it is time to shut UP !
My last words on this some food for thought.
What is the first thing you do in the morning & the last thing you do at night? U-P
A woman without her man is nothing.
Place some commas in there and you have the opposite meaning.
Pfft. I never in a million years would have uttered the sentiment that learning English was easy as a second language.
Never.
I have high respect for ANYONE for whom it is not their native language, yet speaks it intelligently.
Only an ignoramus would say English is easy.
I think he just got red in the face and corrected his inflection. I seem to recall the instructor’s nickname was the “Dragon Lady”, very hot. I wasn’t as lucky in Japanese. All the instructors were Japanese men, the first one named Kumayama (Bear Mountain), 4th degree Judo blackbelt, with a voice like a movie Samurai. Scary dude, but married to a petite American Jewish girl. Their baby would pound on his face while he held her. Hilarious.
Since its my native language I cannot judge this for myself but I do speak a couple of other languages and my friends who learned English and at least one other language tell me:
1. it is very very easy to learn to speak English at a basic level
BUT
2. It is far more difficult than with many other languages to learn to speak English at a really advanced level.
Not only is the spelling a disaster with lots of diphthongs, but it also has a lot more idioms than most other languages. The rules of grammar are not nearly as strict as in most other languages but this can actually make it more difficult when expressing complex ideas.
I speak Hungarian. It was unbelievably difficult to learn. It has certain structure/concepts I had never seen nor heard of in any other language - just wild. That is all in addition to the vocabulary being completely different. You can look at several billboards when you go to Hungary and not understand one single word. That will not be the case if you go to a country that speaks a Germanic or Romance language.
What English particularly excels at is the ability to describe very precise pieces of time. What do I mean?
In a lot of languages, there is no grammatical difference between "I go to the store" (in general) and "I am going to the store" (right this minute). There is no present continuous - no ing form - in many other languages.
It works in past and future tenses too. You could say something like "Bob was going to the store when he saw Cathy." That seems simple but in German for example, you would have to translate that as something like "As Bob was directly en route to the store, he saw Cathy". You have to go out of your way to specify in another way exactly what action he was doing at that precise moment because there is no verb form that allows you to easily do that like you can in English.
Yes....especially basic words. For example:
Finger = Finger, Hand = Hand, Arm = Arm, Schulter = Shoulder, Ribbe = Rib, Lippe = Lip, Auge = Eye, Haar = Hair, Ohr = Ear, Kinn = Chin, Nase = Nose, Knie = Knee, Fuss = Foot.
BUT
I warn you the grammar is completely different.
True. I used to be fluent in French (30 years ago) and took some Spanish.
My friend from Brazil gives me Portuguese language motorcycle magazines and I can get most of what they’re saying.
My daughter is half Hungarian and only speaks a little; she’s growing up in the US.
I am looking for a Spanish teacher for her as it is the only useful language in North America besides English.
yep.
in not so many words.
hehehe
Try the word “set”.
Actually English is a German language from the Angles and Saxons
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Sometimes. Other times there are fine nuances of difference
When my ancestors stepped off the luxurious Cromwell Cruise Lines they somehow managed to learn the language of their new involuntary home land.
Everywhere I go now I hear the cacophony of Meso American invaders who are apparently incapable of STFU for more than a few minutes.
And yes I have come to resent them mightily.
My liberal brother is big on “immigration”.
I did a job where there was a Mexican guy helping me, and I told my brother about him (setting him up for the punchline).
“Yeah - it was a bit difficult sometimes. One of the helpers didn’t speak English except for a few words. But one of the other guys, from Samoa(!) knew English and Spanish very well so he would translate.”
“Well - you can’t expect them all to know English right away.”
“Yeah. Except this guy was the longest-working employee of the company - 27 years in the USA.”
“(One of my most valuable classes, along with Personal Typing, for the future.)”
My son did four years of Latin in 7th - 10th grade. It helped in science, biology, English and Spanish. In High School Spanish class he said he never even did the homework and he got A’s.
Oh - and mom made him take “keyboarding” or whatever it was called. He thought it was so stupid (as did I 45 years ago when my mom made ME take it.) Probably the most practical class my son or I ever took.
“Probably the most practical class my son or I ever took.”
Absolutely. I don’t have a college degree, so what got me in the door at some top companies (GE, Corning, etc.) was my 110 WPM. Then I quickly moved up up up.
Allow me to apologize for posting and running. Usually I try to participate in the discussions of my posts, but I am currently unable to respond as I wish for any extended period of time, due to surgery I had last Monday.
I posted this thread shortly before I had to get a ride to a doctors appointment in Boise yesterday, which is 50 miles away. See, I had reverse shoulder replacement surgery for my right shoulder last Monday on the 5th of February. Yesterday was my first follow appointment since the surgery. As I stated, it was my right shoulder, and I am right handed, so I am unable to use it for a few Months.Now I must count on my left arm, and it will take time to get used to doing so.
In preparation for the surgery and my healing period, I wrote some articles ahead of time and set them to automatically post at predetermined times in the future to my website, (trfmf.com). I also worked out HTML templates so I can post them to FR using minimal work with my left hand.
However, I cannot participate except in a minimum way once they are posted for obvious reasons. Just so you all know I truly enjoyed reading each and every comment. I have been saying it for over 26 years that Free Republic has most informed and educated people who participate in a forums on the WWW on the planet. Bar none.
God bless you all, and keep me in your prayers. Well, when you pray, please mention my wife, Sharee, to God before me. After all, she’s the one who has to deal with this stubborn one armed nut for the next few Months.
I do have other posts I will share as they come up in their prescheduled time. So until then, keep on keeping and God bless you all, Free Republic, and brother Jim.
No worries, get well! Enjoyed the thread!
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