Posted on 03/11/2022 8:57:03 AM PST by xp38
We recently spoke to Kamala Harris, and she agreed to explain complex concepts to our readers. Now, you can learn about everything from Bitcoin to Batman in terms even you can understand. Thanks, Kam—
KAMALA: I'm SPEAKING.
Oh. Sorry, Madame Vice President. Anyway, here are her explanations:
Water: Water is wet. It is not dry. We call water from the sky "rain". You can drink it.
Traffic lights: Green means go. Red means stop. Yellow is kind of a gray area. The skinny man in the light pole changes the signal. He is probably racist.
Speaking: I'm speaking. Okay, I'm speaking. Excuse me. Excuse me. I'm speaking.
Interstellar: The man goes to space. He flies in a black hole. He cries. And there was time travel or something?
Gravity: Things fall down, not up. The earth pulls things down, including black people. Earth is racist.
Bitcoin: It is money. But it is not real. It is in the clouds I think. Basically, it's magic.
Refugees: Ha. Haha. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA [descends into bone-chilling cackle]
Batman: He is 100% bat. He is also 100% man. He is the Batman. This is called the hypobatic union. Batman starts with a "B".
NFTs: They are pictures. You buy them with magic money. You can right-click and download them but that is theft and I will throw you in jail. HAHAHAHAHAHA.
Neurotransmitters: An excitatory transmitter promotes the generation of an electrical signal called an action potential in the receiving neuron, while an inhibitory transmitter prevents it. Whether a neurotransmitter is excitatory or inhibitory depends on the receptor it binds to. Neurotransmitters are racist.
Wordle: The green is good. The yellow is sort of good. The dark squares are bad. Which is racist.
Thanks, Kamala! We've learned so much. Keep following The Babylon Bee for more editions of Kamala Exp—
KAMALA: I. AM. SPEAKING.
How did you even get in here?
America’s sweetheart
Kamalamadingdong Devi Gopalan Harris-Demhoff
Picture her elbows flapping as she speaks, makes it more lifelike.
Hahahaha!!! Good ol’ Babylon Bee, telling it like it is (someday.)
Farce person. Farce election. Farce media. Farce voters. Farce administration. Real evil behind it all.
Excellent interview.
I hate that look she gets when she says she is speaking. And she nods her head when scolding or “explaining”.
“Traffic lights: Green means go. Red means stop. Yellow is kind of a gray area”
A little off topic but I thought yellow meant haul ass.
“Kam’la? ‘Splain.”
And the Democrat’s next president hopeful.
Great! Now you have given PBS ideas...
Her version of Scrabble contains only 2 letters: “H” and “A”.
How did you even get in here?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Disregard of the Constitution by both parties.
Apparently, in Europe, you get a yellow light right before the green (between the red and green). That is so that you can rev your engines up and be the first off the starting line. Sort of like the Christmas tree light at the drag races.
It’s like we have an aging Valley Girl as VP.
It does, until you are gray...
If a VP is speaking and no one is listening, is she really speaking?
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.