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New App 'LootDash' Lets You Send Someone To Loot San Francisco Stores For You
The Babylon Bee ^ | Oct. 7 2021 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 10/12/2021 12:15:39 PM PDT by xp38

SAN FRANCISCO, CA—A hot new Silicon Valley startup allows you to send someone to loot stores in San Francisco and other Democrat-controlled cities with no laws against looting. You can loot from the comfort of your home with just a few simple steps on the app.

"Want to loot a bunch of stuff from Walgreens, but don't want to turn off your Netflix show? Try LootDash!" said LootDash CEO Dirk Hendersen. "Our professional LootDashers are ready and waiting to go steal some stuff from whatever stores you want. Just remember to be generous with your tips!"

LootDash offers a full selection of stores, from pharmacies and big-box retailers to local mom-and-pop businesses. You can even sort the results by race so you know you're looting a white-owned store and not harming a black-owned business with your LootDash order.

"Want us to bust into Best Buy and get a few Xbox Ones? No problem! Just put in your LootDash order and you'll have your pallet full of Xbox systems in 30 minutes or less, guaranteed!"

LootDash charges a small delivery fee for each looting run, but you can sign up for LootPass to waive delivery fees on hauls of a certain dollar value or higher.


TOPICS: Hobbies; Humor
KEYWORDS: app; babylon; babylonbee; bee
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To: xp38

I knew this one was true... gads, the Bee is good...really, really good.


21 posted on 10/12/2021 2:12:46 PM PDT by GOPJ (Military suicide deaths last year: 580- By COVID:56 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOC_dcuJO48)
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To: blueunicorn6
Can I send Nancy Pelosi?

She's already employed looting EVERY American citizen...

22 posted on 10/12/2021 2:15:01 PM PDT by GOPJ (Military suicide deaths last year: 580- By COVID:56 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOC_dcuJO48)
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To: Red Badger

Stop’n Rob for the hood on the run.


23 posted on 10/12/2021 4:49:35 PM PDT by ptsal (Vote R.E.D. >>>Remove Every Democrat ***)
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To: Paladin2

Woohoo! LootDash now a very popular app in San Fransicko!


24 posted on 10/12/2021 7:12:43 PM PDT by SaveFerris (The Lord, The Christ and The Messiah: Jesus Christ of Nazareth - http://www.BiblicalJesusChrist.Com/)
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To: bitt

Thanks for the ping...


25 posted on 10/12/2021 7:26:55 PM PDT by GOPJ (Military suicide deaths last year: 580- By COVID:56 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wOC_dcuJO48)
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To: xp38
Post 12: Ahah...depending upon your particular circumstance there are many shades of potential outcomes:


26 posted on 10/13/2021 3:00:35 AM PDT by ptsal (Vote R.E.D. >>>Remove Every Democrat ***)
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To: Little Ray

10 years ago I would have said you should be in an Institution(do those still exist in Ca ). Now you are looking like Nostradamus :)


27 posted on 10/13/2021 12:14:02 PM PDT by deek69
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To: deek69

The future is looking clearer and clearer to me, and I’d rather be a loonie than right.
Fortunately, I’m old. The Covid didn’t kill me and I won’t get the notavax, not even if I have to do ‘test’ each week.


28 posted on 10/13/2021 12:16:38 PM PDT by Little Ray (Civilization runs on a narrow margin. What sustains it is not magic, but hard work. )
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