Conservatives Sit Down For A Relaxing Evening Of Being Insulted By Every Major Corporation In America

Babylon Bee ^ | 02/07/2021 | Babylon Bee

[tbw2]

All around the country, conservatives have invited friends and family over to enjoy food, funny commercials, football, and being insulted by every major corporation in America.

"I love football," said local Christian conservative Brad Longaberger, "but I also love the humbling experience of sitting through hours of sermons from powerful corporations reminding me how rotten and terrible I am for not supporting progressive causes!"

[fluorescence]

Why wouldn’t they? Only a small proportion of people have changed their purchasing habits in response, while there seems to be a large number who go around proudly claiming that they are too busy to shop online elsewhere or that not letting politics stop you from purchasing things from hip and cool companies is more important than avoiding companies that hate you.

Management at these companies must be laughing themselves silly after discovering that most of the 50% will happily keep lining up for more, no matter how far they go.

[FormerFRLurker]

Meh. I don’t care what color the folks in the commercials are. I never could get into the National Felons League in the first place, as it seems to recruit the worst of all races except Asians.

[Steve_Seattle]

I was told the game started at 3:00 pm Pacific time, so that’s when I tuned in. After 40 minutes of wokeness, the game finally started. But the wokeness continued during the game - in advertisements and even in some of the remarks by the commentators. I might have turned it off entirely if I hadn’t wanted to see Brady’s historic win. (Actually I did turn it off twice - when Biden came on and during the half-time show.)

[sport]

If they[Conservatives]are big enough fools to sit there and take it... Don’t worry about the mule, just load the wagon.

[E. Pluribus Unum]

Anybody else notice how every couple in commercials now is a mixed-race couple?

[TheConservator]

I recently saw that Chase was discriminating against Conservatives, by refusing to process payments for conservative leaning websites.

I wrote them and threatened to cancel my credit card with them if they didn’t knock it off.

I got the usual non-responsive reply.

I signed up for a Discover credit card that has better terms and no annual fee.

I will be letting Chase know that I am in fact cancelling their card, and that they have forever lost my business, as soon as the new card comes in the mail.

Get woke, go broke.

[Secret Agent Man]

didn’t watch

nfl is dead to me forever

they can sit down on pikes and spin, still wont watch

[Steve_Seattle]

"Most of the commercials on Puppy Bowl also had mostly Blacks, or Black guys with White women, no all-White commercials, and if there were 2 or 3 Whites, somewhere in the background was a Black."

It's a mix of virtue-signaling, fear of reprisals from the left if they DON'T do this, pandering, and racist condescension. It's actually as embarrassing as it is offensive, and I wonder how blacks respond to it. I would be insulted in being treated like a child.

[Steve_Seattle]

"Anybody else notice how every couple in commercials now is a mixed-race couple?"

There's a been a big uptick in that in just the past two or three months. Maybe that's the only way they could squeeze in a few white people.

[alternatives?]

“Most Americans have more important things going on and are strong enough to not allow themselves to be insulted by a TV commercial.”

The problem is they are a reminder that their lives are being impacted by diversity quotas in college admissions, hiring, promotions, government and contracts as well as increased taxes to support the establishment. I would disagree and say most Americans do not appreciate being labeled stupid and racist after the sacrifices they have made. Enough is enough.

[Dr. Ursus]

Now, the blame is on Andy Reid and his son!

[Dave Wright]

When will conservatives finally realize that a lot of their angst is caused by watching Sheep TV. Find other things to do like reading or playing music. Your brain will thank you for it.

The only reason to watch Sheep TV sports is if you are betting on the games. Otherwise its not really for you anymore.

[EasySt]

Is it a fair commentary on our present situation to suggest that the Babylon
Bee now represents the finest investigative reporting on the planet?

[Lacey]

I opted for the Pol Bowl. The Amazing Dr Pol.

[tbw2]

They are pretty prescient. They make fun of liberals, and then liberals do it. The joke several months ago about BLM being nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize comes to mind.

[tbw2]

Militant Secularism Could Force Christians to Create New Subcultures
https://lorehaven.com/militant-secularism-could-force-christians-to-create-new-subcultures/

[Meatspace]

The Super Bowl exists for one reason and that is to broadcast commercials. The football that is played between the commercials is simply bait to get you to watch the commercials.

Businesses invest in those commercials and we all have to option to purchase or not purchase the products that are being advertised.

That purchasing power is the only social and economic commentary that arises from Super Bowl commercials.

[Psalm 73]

That's why I recorded it and started watching at 7:00 FFWD to the kick-off and thru any commercials. Ditto half-time.

Just watched football, with NO extraneous crap. It was fun.

[Brian Griffin]

I met leftists halfway.

My TV remained in my living room with the power switched off throughout the spectacle.

[Brian Griffin]

Big corporations will get an expensive lesson in communism shortly.