Posted on 02/10/2020 6:53:42 PM PST by BipolarBob
MANCHESTER, NH—While campaigning in New Hampshire, presidential candidate Bernie Sanders was very confused when he saw the phrase “Live Free or Die” on a license plate. “What is that?” he demanded. When someone explained it was the state motto, he was even more confounded. “Both those options sound horrible!” he exclaimed.
“Living free is exactly what billionaires want,” Sanders told a crowd at a campaign stop. “That way they can accumulate as much money as they want. Think of living free -- everyone involved in peaceful voluntary exchange without government getting in the way -- it would be chaos! That’s exactly what my socialism is here to fix.”
The second part of the slogan Sanders found even more disturbing. “And is someone threatening to kill you if you don’t live free? Is it the billionaires? Are the billionaires holding you all hostage, and are they going to kill you if you don’t live free? Are you under duress? Blink twice if a billionaire is holding you hostage.”
Sanders stared at the crowd for a while. “I saw that guy blink and that woman blink, but I need one person to blink twice to confirm billionaires are threatening you to live free.” Bernie continued to stand silently, watching the crowd for blinks for the next ten minutes.
It’s Babylon Bee.
It’s satire.
The headline got me AGAIN!!!!!
Really?
Yup. The drug-fried-brain “Peace and Freedom” hippie doesn’t really get freedom at all.
That’s really what all this is about. Either fight for our individual God-given freedom or let government take over our lives.
It’s like the Onion but Libertarian
It almost got me for a minute.
Here is more humor:
Last Saturday afternoon in Washington, D.C. an aide to Nancy Pelosi visited the Bishop of the Catholic Cathedral in D.C. He told the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending the next day’s Mass and asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Pelosi to the congregation and say a few words that would include calling Pelosi a saint.
The Cardinal replied,” No, I don’t really like the woman, and there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over some of Pelosi’s views.” Pelosi’s aide then said. “ Look, I’ll write a check here and now for a donation of $100,000 to you if you’ll just tell the congregation you see Pelosi as a saint.”
The Cardinal thought about it and said, “Well, the Church can use the money, so I’ll work your request into tomorrow’s sermon.” As Pelosi’s aide promised, Nancy Pelosi appeared for the Sunday worship and seated herself prominently at the forward left side of the center aisle. As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed out that Ms. Pelosi was present.
The Cardinal went on to explain to the congregation, “While Ms. Pelosi’s presence is probably an honor to some, the woman is not numbered among my personal favorite persons. Some of her most egregious views are contrary to tenets of the Church, and she tends to flip-flop on many other issues. Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self-absorbed, unjustifiably overconceited hypocrite, a thumb sucker, and a nit-wit. Nancy Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief I must say. Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed. She married for money and is using her wealth to lie to the American people. She also has a reputation for shirking her Representative obligations both here in Washington and in California. The woman is simply not to be trusted.”
The Cardinal concluded. “But, when compared with Hillary Clinton, Ms. Pelosi is a saint”
The Bee has it backwards. Sanders wants everyone to live free — except for all FReepers who must continue to slave and carry the load. Free food. Free housing. Free healthcare. Free college. Free internet. Free cars. Free, free, free. FREE!!!
Or is it??? The premise is valid... Bernie hates your freedom... He hates when you don’t pay taxes... He hates that you aren’t distributing your wealth to the unworthy, as much as you do to those who are actually in need and most of all, he hates your freedom to vote for Trump.
Thanks for posting!
Bernie is a tired old commie giving it ONE LAST SHOT.
‘Live Free Or Die’ means it’s all free Bernie...Free rent, free food, and if we can’t live free, we’re going to drop dead in protest.
Bernie is an unrestrained idiot. Daffy Duck in real life
Babylon Bee got me again. Funny article!!
LOL
Sanders is mildly senile, but Biden is about to blow.
Really. He is going to say something really really stupid soon. He already has his handlers scrambling, but as the race heats up his opportunities to say something really unsalvageable stupid is coming,
-and it will be glorious.
That's because good satire is really difficult to discern, since it is close enough to reality to be confused with it.
The Babylon Bee does not do ANY straight news.
It is all satire.
So...every time someone posts a BB story on FR someone has to explain that it’s satire? Good grief. I honestly don’t understand how people 1. don’t realize it’s satire, 2. don’t already know what the Babylon Bee is by this point.
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