Posted on 03/14/2016 11:37:01 PM PDT by Talisker
Little Johnny comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores. "Not yet," said Little Johnny. His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores. Well, he's a little pissed off, so he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken. He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow. He goes to feed the pigs and he kicks a pig. He goes back in for breakfast and his mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal. "How come I don't get any eggs and bacon? Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks. "Well," his mother says, "I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week. I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cow, so for a week you aren't getting any milk." Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen. Little Johnny looks up at his mother with a smile, and says: "Are you going to tell him, or should I?"
It’s not that funny.
Laughter ensues
No hairballs for a week?
RIMSHOT!
So a week without mice for breakfast?
One night the older sister of twin brothers convinced them it was time they learned to curse like real farmhands. She helped them practice quietly in their room that evening until they were sure they were ready for the big day. They got up that morning and dressed as usual and went down to breakfast.
Their mother asked the first twin what he wanted for breakfast and he put on his best farmhand voice and said “I
think I’ll have a bowl of them damn Cheerios”
The mother, without a word grabbed the boy by his shirt collar, drug him to the sink and washed his mouth out with laundry soap, spanked him and sent him back to his room. She then turned to the second twin and asked him what he wanted for breakfast.
His wide eyed reply was; “It sure as Hell won’t be Cheerios!”
Thanks. That was funnier than the joke.
It's okay, you can laugh.
All this reminds me of my first mother-in-law, who was a 5-year-old girl in Orebro, Sweden, when the first automobile came to town.
After seeing one in the town square she ran eight blocks to the home of a professor she liked and urged him, “Come quickly. There’s a carriage in the town square that doesn’t need a horse. It’s called an ‘automobile’”!
“Don’t be silly, Ingrid,” said the professor. “There can’t be any such thing. ‘Auto’ is Greek and ‘Mobile’ is Latin.”
And then he closed the door and went back to bed.
http://www.wnd.com/2015/08/anti-trumpians-just-dont-get-it/#i73xLwleLfGZLKUM.99 (It’s a Trump joke)
Ice Cthream Anyone?
All that reading for THAT punchline? Meh
So cute. LOL!
Cthulhu makes ice cream now? Yikes!
I hear it’s R’lyeh good.
Er, I don’t get it.
Obligatory credit to Groucho Marx.
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