Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
That’s why I never buy bananas in bags. Ever. Period. :oO
Well. Even that takes a lot of thinking. Perhaps he will find something better than Caterpillar.
I went out to sit, and today, it was just Charlie and me, but we actually don’t need other people to have fun. He’s smart enough that he doesn’t need to pack a dictionary around with him to understand what I’m saying.
Something bit me on the back of my left knee, and I have absolutely nothing in this house that will stop the itch. When the kids were home, I always had something, but have long since not made it a standard on my list.
And this is the second notice I’ve gotten from JiffyLube about taking the truck in for service. I also have to get the tires rotated, and both of them are due because it’s been a year.
Maybe when I drop off my prescription at Walgreen’s tomorrow, I can get something for the itch.
I sent Bill to get the car inspected, and he came back saying it didn’t pass because two tires need to be replaced. We’ll have to do it tomorrow.
I wanted to clarify that when I said Kathleen was “stuck” in the wheelbarrow, I meant that she was sitting in the puddle afraid to climb down. She wasn’t incapacitated or anything.
I’m not worried about the tires on the truck for now. Discount Tire will tell me the shape they’re in when they rotate the tires. And that’s free. Jiffy Lube is $40. It was $40 last year, but I don’t know how much for this year. I have a coupon for $8 off, so I’m thinking the price has gone up.
And since I don’t need to get the truck inspected with the new license plate requirements, I’m not worried about that, either. And that isn’t due until November, I think. Maybe October. So the service is about the only expense, right now. It’s pretty important in this climate.
I knew Kathleen wasn’t stuck! She’s such a precocious child, she really tickles me!
Oh. I meant to tell you: I got a new air filter several days ago, and recently kept smelling cigarette smoke from my neighbor. So I took the old one out and was absolutely shocked at how filthy it was! And once again, I thanked me for getting Filtrete filters! My lungs thank me, too!
Now the air smells good! :o])
Thank you. (Whew.) I had a scarier picture in mind.
Twelve puppies?? WHOA! They all look alike!
Baker’s dozen....I count thirteen, then I run out of fingers.
LOL! I’ll remember that when I’m asked to shake your hands! ;o]
Oh, you won’t have to do that. They pretty much shake by themselves. Though, if the need a kickstart, I’ll know who to call.
;>)
Sorry about the confusion. I wasn’t thinking how that could sound.
Well, kiddos, I’m outta here.
I was looking at some fabrics online at JoAnn’s to make up into the dress pattern I have, and got really depressed. All the fabrics/designs I really liked were upholstery fabrics! My luck!
So it looks like I will have to go look and try to choose. I was hoping not to do that because of driving in the heat (they don’t open until 0900) but it looks like that’s what I will have to do if I want to get some fabric. And The COST? *swoon* Not cheap, these days. :o[
Anyway, it was for future reference, anyway.
They closed the Hancock store in my neighborhood...will have to hunt for canvas online now.
Hope you have a good night. I have dropped some kids at the swim meet, and now I’m getting the next batch ready for Cub Scouts. Bill will go over in a while to make himself useful to the swim team.
6 and 7? How many on your right hand?
I can count up to 31 on one hand.
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.