Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
“When working after the cleaning crew has gone”
Slippers....i’ll say no more. :)
I think that’s pretty doggone awesome of GB!
At least they fix problems before they get out of hand.
Iknowhuh? LOL!
Thanks!
LoL.
Would hate for you to miss this: http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/3396196/posts
We are having the forecast “snow shower.” It’s not much. I’m cooking some biscuits for the kids’ lunch.
Saw that.
Syracuse, northwest of me.
Officially it was :The report of Sir Hermann Bondi on the North Sea flood of 1953 affecting parts of the Thames Estuary and parts of London.
More likely it was the thought of the London underground network having to be pumped out that spurred them into action.
Plus all of the other tunnels under London, both known and secret.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thames_Barrier
Haven’t had any this year.
They promised it. But not yet.
The toboggan waits patiently on hot-standby.
We are having sun and another 70+ degree day. YAY!!
Biscuits sound good! I have sausage, but no biscuits...now I’m all hungry for it...
“You’ve posted a total of 53 threads and 12,987 replies.”
Really?
Wow. Great article!
I’m just darn chatty
You’ve posted a total of 8 threads and 133,715 replies.
Notice they miss out the event of its first raising...It jammed up for several hours. Oops.
LoL, not kidding.
I’ve just crunched the numbers.... :)
Two thousand or so replies beyond 65,535 x 2.
So two Undead Thread original.
Current temp is 33.
My front door is open... :o]) Summer is coming!!!
In theory, summer is coming here, too.
“You’ve posted a total of 2 threads and 85,884 replies.”
Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy penguins and there are no unhappy penguin owners!!! Ask Patrick!
I suspect our summer will be here in a couple of weeks. I’m sorry about the delay in yours.
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