Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
They are both national sports.....fussing and procrastinating.
Evening ‘Face.
Those pics where lovely this morning, a few of them will be migrating to a desktop near here, soon.
That sounds very nice. I’m glad Reading wasn’t as bad as you expected.
Oh the town is....
This Pub is a little haven just off the inner ringroad. As long as you don’t look across the river it’s great. :)
I get home sick for that place, and that’s the truth!
I’m glad you like them, Moosie! They should migrate to a lot of desktops!! <3
Fussing and procrastinating are national sports of GB? LOL! That must be where I get it! ;o]
Ah, one of those places.
A handsome display of petunias.
It’s why the Aussies call us Whinging Poms.....they just don’t understand the finer points of the sport. :)
A handsome display of bike riders... ;o]
Oh. Yes. Those ARE handsome petunias. Actually, they look more like pansies, and pansies are my favorite blossoms.
LOL!
You’re a breath of fresh air, Moosie!
It’s 55 out, but the wind is N@9, and the humidity is 47%. It’s been partly cloudy all day, and I went out only to throw out the garbage and check the mail. And I slept in this morning, until almost 0600. In fact, the garbage truck woke me up.
I wasted a whole HOUR! Dang!
Tomorrow I will be up at 0500, as usual! I’m just not used to sleeping in. :o])
Off now....
Night ‘Face.
Night All
Good night. It’s kitteh dinner time here.
Sleep well, FRiend!
DP is very right to be suspicious of us, considering the liberties I among others have taken with knowing where you live.
Knowing where we live is not the same as knowing that we are home. ;o]
Since you know where I live, you don’t have to invite me on a cruise for your nefarious purpose.
Porpoise, that is.
Nefarious porpoise. He claims it’s a science experiment.
I came across a new word today.
Veritaphobia
The true sign of a liberal.
No.
What I said was when they made my birthday a national holiday they named it after some other guy who coincidentally was born on the same day of the month as I but almost two decades earlier. Then standardized it to the perpetual Monday because the government can't get minor things like proper days correct. Just as they can't get Abe Washington's birthdays on the correct days of the month since days of the month tend to wander about a bit falling on a Monday in general every seven years give or take a leapyear...
If what they wanted was an excuse for a long weekend, they could have celebrated it on the real day this year. But bureaucrats have no discernible logic..
That would make you 34, wouldn't it?
Yes. I verified with my baby Sis that she is indeed 29 and since I am five years older than she, I am 34. To verify my age again we will revisit her age come the Ides of March when she has an adversary of her nativity...
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