Posted on 12/10/2015 1:17:32 PM PST by ArGee
Raqqa, Syria
Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, the leader of the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant, also known as ISIS, announced today that he would be disbanding all forces and returning all land to Syria and Iraq. The move was prompted by the ongoing Climate Conference in Paris.
"This is one thing we could not have anticipated," Mr. al-Baghdadi said in prepared remarks. "When we see the world coming together like this on such a dangerous subject as Global Climate Change, we realize that our Caliphate will never survive. It's only a matter of time before Climate Change is no more and the world's attention turns to us. At that point, we will have no chance. For the sake of the men, women, and children who have supported us, I can not continue a doomed campaign."
An emotional al-Baghdadi did not take any questions.
Sources close to al-Baghdadi who spoke on the condition of anonymity told us that it was becoming more and more difficult to recruit new fighters. "Even our existing people are extremely demoralized," one said. "The words of Donald Trump himself can not overcome our dispair."
According to their press release, surrender is total and immediate. Fighters are being paid and sent home by division. Any remaining money will be put into a fund to resettle Christians and Yazidis who have been displaced by the war.
"We thought the world was fragmented," one strategist was overheard saying to himself. "Who knew it could come together like this? This is a stinging rebuke."
So far there has been no comment from Damascus, Baghdad, Moscow, or Washington. One source inside the Kremlin said, "We are waiting to see if there will be any follow-up action. We want to make sure this is real before we decide on our next steps."
I got an email from Dell, saying my computer has been repaired and should be delivered by Tuesday, the 12. However, I will probably have to reinstall the OS.
We’ll see. They didn’t tell me what the problem was, and I doubt they ever will. However, I don’t trust this Toshiba, but I’m glad I had it for the interim. It seems my computers all die about a week before payday. GAH!
At least he’s not setting himself on fire.
LOLZ!!!
Both are pretty funny!
That’s a good one.
I lay down on the sofa because my back hurt and woke up two hours later. Dang. Wassupwithat?
I think I need to vacuum and then take the trash out.
I had choir practice, appropriating the cultures of Mexico, Ecuador, and Puerto Rico. Then I read some books about animals to Kathleen. Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
I’m thinking of nap now.
Done with that part of the housework. Now I’m going to let the morphine work before I mop the kitchen floor. Ohwhatfun.
I’m looking forward to seeing what the Dell will be like when I get it back. If I didn’t need a computer for my banking, I don’t think I would have one...
I hope your nap is good!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Parrots are beautiful, but I think one would make an annoying pet!
Aye matey!
Haha!!!
Awk!
Something me mentioning the scenery at Hawks Nest near here without giving you a whole lot more info... ;-)
That’s a very good point. Wish I’d thought of it.
Thanks for the link, NC.
The sight of the Flying Scotsman crossing the Ribblehead viaduct is one of the photo opportunities of a life time.
Ribblehead is in the middle of nowhere,on the Settle to Carlisle line.
Jedi master Whiskers fends off the Dogs of War.....
The empire of the food bowl lives in a state of uneasy truce.
Wow. Cool.
Hi Face,
Saw the thing in Steam years ago. They are a lovely sight.
There is mainline steam most weekends throughout the summer. :)
Dump the diesel and OHL, Go Steam!
There used to be a train that went through one of the pastures west of town when I was a really short person, and I had no idea it was a real train. It was just SO BIG! I’m sure it was steam powered, at least the first year we lived there.
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