Posted on 07/30/2015 12:04:02 PM PDT by Theoria
The groundskeeper of a Norwegian golf course said a mystery pooper targeting course holes must be a man "because the poos are too massive to be from a woman."
Kenneth Tennfjord, groundskeeper at the Stavanger Golf Club, said he has been finding human feces and toilet paper in course holes since 2005.
"He has a couple of favorite holes," Tennfjord told the Rogaland Avis newspaper. "And we know it is a man because the poos are too massive to be from a woman."
"He poos only on weekdays. On weekends I have never found poo on the golf course," Tennfjord said.
He said the fecal discoveries are usually accompanied by used toilet paper.
Steinar Floisvik, managing director of the club, said the mystery pooper used to arrive via bicycle.
"In the early morning dew we observed bicycle tracks on the course. Footsteps showed that he had done his business, and the bicycle tracks disappeared back the way they came," Floisvik said.
Frode Jormeland, another groundskeeper, said the club installed high-powered spotlights to discourage the defecation, but the poop-etrator disabled them.
"He climbed up a tree next to the lights and wriggled far out on a branch and dismantled the spotlights. How he managed the feat without electrocuting himself or falling is a riddle," he said.
Floisvik said the pooper's motives are unknown.
"Our idea is that it could be someone who, for unknown reasons, hates the game of golf. Alternatively, the person may have a fetish or suffer from mental problems," he said.
(Excerpt) Read more at upi.com ...
Must be a “thygher-voods” fan?
Okay, you need to stop that, I LOL’ed so loud the cube farm dwellers are staring at me...
During recent trip to United States, observed many, honorable Americans at place called golf course playing game called "Ah, $hit!"
too massive to be from a woman
Yeah ok. Keep believing that one!
Oh, I dunno, anyone seen Mooche in the area?
I’ll eat the loser!
Easy there, family show.
Love that movie!
And welcome to the first annual Ex-Lax Open. Tiger Woods approaches the green on 17. It’s a Par 4. His caddy had suggested the extra-large burrito...
There is some evidence that is not female.
Okay, you need to stop that, I LOLed so loud the cube farm dwellers are staring at me...
____________________________________________
Then you best stop reading right here. My next post - well. Words fail....
"They suspect nothing."
“If your mother goes to the bathroom and says ‘Ya’ll come look at this before I flush it!, you might be a redneck.”
J. Foxworthy.
Yeah. Right.
LENA DUNHAM: Too Massive, ya say? I got your massive righhhhhhhhhhtttt here.
"Why did you do that?"
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