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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 04/10/2015 5:39:24 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

 

We are living in the Twilight Zone with news stories like these...

White House: Despite Order, Venezuela Not a National Security Threat to U.S.

U.S. Expects to Remove Cuba from Terrorist List Ahead of Panama Summit

Jeb Bush Identified Himself as "Hispanic" on Voter Form

Obama: Ban Parents from Having Children Counseled Not to be ‘LGBTQ+’

 

 

 


A massive power outage in Washington, D.C., today affected a number of federal buildings, including the White House. When asked when they could restore power to the White House, officials said, "2016?" ~ Fallon

A new survey found that a growing number of millennials want to work from home and get more time off. They would have said more, but they had to pick up their gold star for participating in that survey.  ~ Fallon

The top 15 contenders for the Republican nomination own at least 40 guns among them. If we elect a Republican president no one is hopping over the White House fence ever again. ~ Conan

A new poll in Cuba shows that President Obama is more popular than Fidel Castro. Then again, so is putting your whole family on a raft in the middle of the night. ~ Seth Meyers 

Jeb Bush is facing criticism after it was just revealed that he checked off his race as "Hispanic" on a voter registration form back in 2009. When asked if he regrets it now, Bush said, "Si.” ~ Fallon


 



TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: ofst; queer; silliness; twilightzone
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To: Lucky9teen

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I’ve been trippin’ all day.


21 posted on 04/10/2015 6:09:17 AM PDT by ZinGirl (kids in college....can't afford a tagline right now)
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To: Lucky9teen

I just saw that exact episode of “Twilight Zone” the other night!


22 posted on 04/10/2015 6:10:19 AM PDT by Old Sarge (Its the Sixties all over again, but with crappy music...)
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To: Lucky9teen
"Run Joe Run!!"


23 posted on 04/10/2015 6:13:25 AM PDT by TexasCajun
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To: Lucky9teen

Obama is what the kids are frightfully screaming about. Obama is using bees as cover.


24 posted on 04/10/2015 6:14:51 AM PDT by Berlin_Freeper (Ted Cruz 2016!)
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To: Lucky9teen
Robert A. Heinlein's crazy years.

Not quite as bad as he predicted, but there is still time yet.

25 posted on 04/10/2015 6:15:14 AM PDT by fireforeffect (A kind word and a 2x4, gets you more than just a kind word.)
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To: Lucky9teen

26 posted on 04/10/2015 6:18:44 AM PDT by Paul46360 (..)
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To: SERKIT
 photo 1412713494734_zps4bqssm0k.jpg
27 posted on 04/10/2015 6:25:50 AM PDT by RetSignman (Obama is the walking, talking middle finger in the face of America)
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To: Lucky9teen
 photo Probablynot_zps0aa36996.jpg
28 posted on 04/10/2015 6:27:16 AM PDT by mykroar ("Never believe anything until it has been officially denied." - Otto von Bismarck)
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To: mykroar

29 posted on 04/10/2015 6:28:52 AM PDT by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: Lucky9teen


30 posted on 04/10/2015 6:29:29 AM PDT by JoeProBono (SOME IMAGES MAY BE DISTURBING VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED;-{)
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To: Lucky9teen

The other day, while at the mall, I saw four gorgeous ladies about my age...

Wanting to be nice, I said good morning to them. Not one of them even looked at me.

It was...
.
.
(Wait for it)
.
.
A QUADRUPLE BYPASS!!!!


31 posted on 04/10/2015 6:29:54 AM PDT by JRios1968 (I'm guttery and trashy, with a hint of lemon. - Laz)
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To: Lucky9teen

Watching the media spin up the narrative on Hillary Clinton is like someone introducing you to your ex-wife at a party.


32 posted on 04/10/2015 6:30:10 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If you are not part of the solution, there is good money to be made prolonging the problem.)
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To: JRios1968

An old Amish guy was sitting with his son. He watched an elderly lady push a button on a door. The door opened and the lady went in and the door closed. He asked someone about it and they said “It’s an elevator”. Just then, the door opened and a beautiful blonde strolled out. The Amish man turned to his son and said “Boy, go get your momma. I want her to try that elevator”.


33 posted on 04/10/2015 6:35:15 AM PDT by AppyPappy (If you are not part of the solution, there is good money to be made prolonging the problem.)
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To: Lucky9teen

34 posted on 04/10/2015 6:35:37 AM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
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To: SERKIT
"Well, you know. ...these ISIS Terrorist would be like soooo much more peaceful if they had, you know, jobs or something. ...it would be like totally awesome dudes!"


35 posted on 04/10/2015 6:35:59 AM PDT by TexasCajun
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To: ShadowAce

36 posted on 04/10/2015 6:36:49 AM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
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To: Heartlander

37 posted on 04/10/2015 6:38:11 AM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
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To: TexasCajun

Well that’s one way to get him to shut up.


38 posted on 04/10/2015 6:38:50 AM PDT by Godzilla (3/7/77)
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To: Lucky9teen

39 posted on 04/10/2015 6:40:46 AM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either satire or opinion. Or both.)
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To: Lucky9teen
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?" "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!'

I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"

40 posted on 04/10/2015 6:41:00 AM PDT by TexasCajun
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