Dear JR and FreeRepublic: I haven't been laid by anyone but my hairy cellmate in years so I got zot

[srm913]

Thank you, FR, for the truly marvelous entertainment _{(as I haven't been laid in so long I get no other entertainment other than watching people on here like a perv stalker)} . While lurking tonight _{(the internet version of peeping in your windows)} for the first time in ages, the amount of schadenfreude I'm experiencing is bordering on orgasmic _{(which is the closest I've gotten to the real thing in years)}.

Y'all have a blessed day. I certainly will! _{(after I go play hide the Anthony Wiener with my 'blue' friends who have nothing else to do either other than peep at websites they were banned from.)}

[GVnana]

OUCH! LOL!

[reaganaut]

You really should add “and it came to pass” to at least one of those.

[TLI]

I have a theory on the zuicide attempt of srm913.

The last post was six years, eight months ago.

Gets back on FR expecting everybody to be cheering Mittwitt because...

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1363748/posts?page=3#3

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1363748/posts?page=32#32

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1378205/posts?page=73#73

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1378205/posts?page=67#67

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1378205/posts?page=65#65

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/1378205/posts?page=62#62

srm913 is a Mormon.

.

[GVnana]

Maybe you should consider selling your “cellmate” on E-Bay.

[Vendome]

Frickin Romneybots are odd....aggressively so...

[onyx]

You have it right.

LDS-Romney-bot.

[Tennessee Nana]

and it came to pass...

:)

[DJ MacWoW]

Well his magic underwear didn’t protect him.

[decal]

“srm913 is a Mormon.”

Well, if he'd rather vote for a liberal Mormon than a conservative gentile, he's on the wrong forum - FreeTabernacle is <—— THATAWAY...

[OneVike]

I will always pray for those who are caught up in Mormonism, plus those who are confused in believing it is just another mainstream denomination of Christianity.

However, I will admit that I have very little patience with them when they try to claim they are Christians.

As for Mittens, I have two major problems with him, many small, but two major.

One is he is a cultist Mormon,

The second one is that he thinks sucking babies from a womb is OK, until he decides to run for president.

Breaking News Mitt, abortion is evil even if you are not running for president, and it does not take normal humans a chance at being president to finally understand that.

[onyx]

I keep hearing about that. Someday, I will have to research it.

[DJ MacWoW]

They have special underwear that they buy from the church to wear to church. A holy garment like the priests wore. Ya gotta laugh. Underpants?! LOL

[onyx]

I know very little about the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints and maybe I should force myself to learn more. I know that it was started by a man named Joseph Smith, whom I think was a delusional crack pot and I know that the church has a very nice Tabernacle choir and missionaries all over the world.

Of course, I'm now learning that Romney is quite high in his church, and he's managed to keep his religion out of this primary race, which wasn't the case in '08. I detest Romney for many reasons, and he is still an abortionist, still a gun-grabber, still big government (Romneycare for the states) and a serial, congenital liar, with no Romeny ever serving in our military.

Like you say, "God help us." Keep praying.

[onyx]

I know very little about the Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter Day Saints and maybe I should force myself to learn more. I know that it was started by a man named Joseph Smith, whom I think was a delusional crack pot and I know that the church has a very nice Tabernacle choir and missionaries all over the world.

Of course, I'm now learning that Romney is quite high in his church, and he's managed to keep his religion out of this primary race, which wasn't the case in '08. I detest Romney for many reasons, and he is still an abortionist, still a gun-grabber, still big government (Romneycare for the states) and a serial, congenital liar, with no Romeny ever serving in our military.

Like you say, "God help us." Keep praying.

[onyx]

Oh dear! I’ve heard it all now!

[DJ MacWoW]

Yeah that’s not quite a Priests ephod. LOL

[decal]

I don’t think the Mormons are going to be best pleased with the treatment the Biased Media (BM for short) has in store for them this summer and fall if Willard gets the nod...

[DJ MacWoW]

Slick Willard will be very easy to tear apart. Especially since his father was born in Mexico because his grandfather fled there to evade polygamy laws. They’re going to eat him alive!

[reaganaut]

One little correction, they don’t just wear the magic underwear to church, they wear them ALL the time. When I was Mormon, most LDS women wore their bras OVER them rather than under.

They are referred to as ‘the holy garments of the Priesthood’.

Onyx, I entreat you to learn more.

Historically, UTLM.org cannot be beat
Doctrinally, Mormonoutreach.org and MRM.org as well as IRR.org/mit
For personal stories, exmormon.org is the place to go to get into their mindset.

As always I, and several other ex-mormons here are available to answer questions.

Regarding the ‘magic underwear’ here is probably the best link...

http://www.i4m.com/think/temples/mormon-garments.htm

[dayglored]

Hi Onyx!

> Oh dear! I’ve heard it all now!

Well, you can read all about it too!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_underpants

And remember, they're completely serious about this. See the "External Links" at the end of the article for information straight from the Mormons themselves.