Posted on 07/28/2006 12:19:03 AM PDT by sully777
Phrases that sound innocent as well as dirty--depending on your mindset:
Petra told Ingrid, "You have a lovely rug."
Let's grab something at the golden arches.
St. Louis was once known as Mound City.
She was caught raising the flag this weekend.
The cavernous hole is wet with dew.
She favored wood as a golfer.
No one ever confused Lance as a wine sipper; hard stuff was his passion.
There was ecstatic joy as Marc Spitz lapped the pool several times in triumph, until he accidently fell into the mud.
We were in a tight spot as our camels' toes were stuck in the sand.
They sat silently, watching a Yankee game, when Bearnice cried out in delight, "Randy Johnson's pitches are high hard ones!" The girls nodded knowingly.
Shag was her favorite course in rug making at TCC's interior design class.
And the all-time classic:
If I tell you that's tight, will you hold that against me?
a little rough on the 'roids
but you remember this:
Dr Evil: "On the whole, Preparation H feels good."
Scott Evil: "You're right, Preparation H does feel good.....on the hole."
A backwards poet writes inverse.
A baker stopped making donuts after he got tired of the hole thing.
A baker's job is a piece of cake.
A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
A cannibal's favourite game is 'swallow the leader'.
A cardboard belt would be a waist of paper.
A cat ate some cheese and waited for a mouse with baited breath.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
A criminal's best asset is his lie ability.
A dentist and manicurist fought tooth and nail.
A ditch digger is entrenched in his career.
A doctor who fell on his funny bone had a nurse tell him it was a humerus incident.
A dog went to the flea circus and stole the show.
A good baker will rise to the occasion - it's the yeast he can do.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
A guy became so good with a chainsaw that he was promoted to branch manager.
A guy who used to sell boomerangs is trying for a comeback.
A guy with money to burn may well find a gal who wants to play with fire.
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
A karate school restaurant served mainly chops.
A long knife has been invented that cuts four loaves of bread at a time called a four loaf cleaver.
A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.
A man given a watch at his retirement said 'it's about time'.
A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.
A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.
A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.
A murderer had heartburn because of something the assassinate.
A music store was robbed. The thief made away with the lute.
A nut named Hazel held up a bank saying 'give me all the cashew have'.
A pediatrician is a doctor of little patients.
A perfectly spherical pumpkin makes good pi.
A pet store had a bird contest with no perches necessary.
A plateau is a high form of flattery.
A police dog is often the scenter of a drug arrest.
A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.
A sailor who met a widow was soon second mate.
A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.
A tangled bell ringer tolled himself off.
A tatoo artist has designs on his clients.
A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
A waterbed may just be the vinyl resting place.
A zoo had a camel with no humps named 'Humphrey'.
A zoo had too many panda bears, so they built a pandemonium.
Acupuncture is a jab well done.
Alcohol and calculus don't mix so don't drink and derive.
An ambassador is the one who lies abroad for the good of the country.
An elevator makes ghosts happy because it lifts the spirits.
An experienced waiter can give a lot of good tips.
An office with many people and few electrical outlets could be in for a power struggle.
Ancient orators tended to Babylon.
bttt
Wanna come out and play????
Finally, got my 40 hours this week. Going home and get Just Relaxin' (the boat) ready for fishing tomorrow.
Have a great weekend, everyone!!!
That image goes really well with my french fries!
BTW, check out this story.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-chat/1673907/posts
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