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Lightning Rod Gets The Zot
The Poet's Eye ^ | Lightning Rod

Posted on 10/23/2010 5:17:52 PM PDT by Lrod

A character like Christine O'Donnell presents a unique problem for a humorist. Few elaborations are called for since the caricature is self-embodied. All that is needed is a dead-pan Jack Benny look. You know, the one where he just stares blankly at the audience without saying a word and eventually someone titters and before you know it the whole place is in hysterics? Her very existence as a major party candidate for US Senate is the kind of comedy which arrives ready-written and would only be spoiled by embellishment. I mean, what can you add to rabidantimasturbationtarianism, rats with fully-functioning human brains and her famous Witches of Eastwick campaign ad that looks like it was produced by Tim Burton? I had fully intended to leave Ms. O'Donnell to the other comedians and the pundits who were wearing her out on cable TV. But then came the most recent revelation that she has claimed that her father was Bozo the Clown. Here I had to break my silence, not in the name of humor, but in the cause of veracity. This is a subject I happen to know something about.

Long ago, for one magic season, I was related by marriage to Bozo the Clown. I'm not making this up. My father was a semi-notorious lothario in the television and advertising business. Sometime after he turned 50, he married the 17 year-old daughter of one of his professional colleagues, Larry Harmon, the guy who owned the franchise to Bozo, the Most Famous Clown in the World. He was Bozo Primero, not one of the many FauxZos who were franchised in every major media market. I was much closer to the power center of the Bozo world than Ms. O'Donnell ever dreamed of being. It gave me an intimate glimpse into the backstage life of clowns. I knew little of the inside workings of the clown business in those days. Like a naive child, I had assumed that, you know, Bozo was Bozo. It never occurred to me that there was a school, like a Bozo boot-camp, where imposters went to learn how to walk like a Bozo and talk like a Bozo and draw the red rictus of a smile on their faces with greasepaint. It was like learning a dirty family secret and it was a big disappointment. When you go to see Bozo, you want it to really be Bozo, not some guy dressed up in a Bozo costume.

I hadn't thought about my brief inclusion in greasepaint royalty for years until Ms. O'D surfaced with her claims of actually being a blood relative of Bozo the Clown. The marriage between my father and Princess Bozo, which was chronologically challenged to begin with, barely outlasted the honeymoon. They had about as much in common as Christine would have in common with the 99 other US Senators. Suddenly the whole subject bubbled from my subconscious and made me wonder about franchises and politicians and the authenticity of clowns.

Since John Quincy Adams carried forth his father's political legacy, American politicians have campaigned on the richness of their family's past public service. Roosevelt and Kennedy and Bush all represent minor dynasties and it is entirely in keeping with this tradition for Ms. O'D to claim descent from Bozo. Clowning is as present in the current of American politics as populism, liberalism or conservatism. But in light of Ms. O'D's penchant for resume enhancement, she fibbed about her college career and has downplayed her wiccan studies, her claims to clownly ancestry are also suspect. While she seems like a natural and can certainly get a laugh and works well in the side-shows, one has to wonder if she is really ready for the Big Top, the center ring.

The US Senate is the Big League of Buffoonery. Even pros like Colbert have trouble hanging there. It's a tough room. Notice that Al Franken, even with all his years of practical comic experience, has been keeping mum in deference to the mime-masters of the Senate. These clowns can juggle, ride unicycles, do pratfalls and get shot from cannons, all with the perfect dead-pan of their painted-on media faces. They are consummate clowns adept with all the tricks, the seltzer bottle, the pie-in-the-face, the filibuster. I don't want to get all Stephen King on you but these aren't nice clowns. Ms. O'D should think twice before she alienates her witch constituency, she may need some strong juju to avoid the dunking stool. They'll make her the senator-punk-clown. Every troupe of clowns has one, the smallest clown, bottom of the pecking order, the one who all the other clowns slap and when there is no smaller clown for her to slap, she turns to the audience with her out-turned palms and pitiful Emmett Kelly frown and says, "I am you."

Two of the greatest Senatorial Clowns, Lloyd Bentson and Dan Quayle, in their famous vice-presidential debate in 1988 demonstrated the type of cut-throat comedy these jokers are capable of. When Quayle set the joke up by comparing his inexperience to the inexperience of Jack Kennedy, Bentson spiked it with this punch-line, "Senator," he said, "I served with Jack Kennedy. I knew Jack Kennedy. Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine. Senator, you are no Jack Kennedy."

The Poet's Eye would like to say to Christine O'Donnell in this same spirit, "Ms. O'Donnell, you say your father is Bozo. Well, I knew Bozo. Bozo was briefly my step-grand-father-in-law. Christine, your father was no Bozo."

Yes I’m stuck in the middle with you, and I’m wondering what it is I should do. It’s so hard to keep this smile from my face. Losing control yeah I'm all over the place.

Clowns to the left of me! Jokers to the right! Here I am stuck in the middle with you. ---Joe Egan and Gerry Rafferty

Visit The Poet's Eye


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics; Society
KEYWORDS: bozot; christineodonnell; clownzot; hater; humor; kittychow; molassesmiasma; odonnell; ozone; penguinhumor; satire; sionnsar; thepoetseye; troll; vikingkitties; vikingkitty; zot
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To: All

Later, all. This computer is a bit annoying to use, and I have caught up on my ping lists. I now have the WSJ to read, and a few other things to do over the next 4 hours. Including a shower (the next lounge over — there are two on this concourse— has a couple, and dinner.)


1,321 posted on 11/19/2010 2:33:28 PM PST by sionnsar (IranAzadi|5yst3m 0wn3d-it's N0t Y0ur5:SONY|TV--it's NOT news you can trust)
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To: sionnsar

Have a good evening, sion. And early welcome back!


1,322 posted on 11/19/2010 3:18:25 PM PST by Monkey Face (This statement is false.)
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To: Monkey Face; Tax-chick; sionnsar

I’ve always found that looking forward to something is half the fun.
Good for you, you Son and your Grandson!


I heard that it takes a year to get rid of the TSA after they are fired. Something about contracts? I hope that’s not true.

What are you seeing, Sion? What’s happening out there?


1,323 posted on 11/19/2010 5:30:04 PM PST by fanfan (Why did they bury Barry's past?)
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To: fanfan

I hear better in my right ear than my left ear. This is a good thing because they say a lot better things.


1,324 posted on 11/19/2010 9:43:27 PM PST by ThomasThomas (If bacon grew on trees I would be a vegetarian.)
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To: ThomasThomas; Anoreth; Monkey Face; ColdOne

1,325 posted on 11/20/2010 3:16:02 AM PST by Tax-chick (Global Warming: the first faith preached exclusively by hypocrites.)
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To: Tax-chick

It is morning.

We saw Harry Potter last night. Then we ate pizza.


1,326 posted on 11/20/2010 4:52:59 AM PST by NicknamedBob (Maybe I can become a were-spork-weasel. It is good to have aspirations. Essential, actually.)
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To: NicknamedBob

It is morning. We started the day with a guitar concert, around 5:15 a.m.

How was the movie and the pizza?


1,327 posted on 11/20/2010 4:55:02 AM PST by Tax-chick (Global Warming: the first faith preached exclusively by hypocrites.)
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To: Anoreth

Did you see Harry Potter, too? How much snow did you get?

The World’s Cleanest Youth is in the shower again.


1,328 posted on 11/20/2010 5:33:13 AM PST by Tax-chick (Global Warming: the first faith preached exclusively by hypocrites.)
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To: Tax-chick

Good morning. I think.

CCD has a new meaning. I like it better than the old one!


1,329 posted on 11/20/2010 5:40:44 AM PST by Monkey Face (This statement is false.)
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To: Monkey Face

It would be nice if one could file catz for the night and get them out in the morning ...


1,330 posted on 11/20/2010 5:41:46 AM PST by Tax-chick (Global Warming: the first faith preached exclusively by hypocrites.)
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To: NicknamedBob; fanfan; sionnsar; Tax-chick; Dead Corpse; All

I’ll wait and see if I have any money left after I bail Miss Daisy out and finish with getting her on the road before I go see HP. As it is, I have three days of matinees I can watch in relative peace before the kids are out for the holiday.

It would be nice to see a movie while it’s in the thearers. Last time I did that was when the LOTR movies came out. Then I saw all of them twice. ;o]


1,331 posted on 11/20/2010 5:46:00 AM PST by Monkey Face (This statement is false.)
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To: Tax-chick

Kids, too.

What’s on the docket for today at the TC Household?


1,332 posted on 11/20/2010 5:50:24 AM PST by Monkey Face (This statement is false.)
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To: Tax-chick

The movie and the pizza were both good, though overpriced by my standards, which are decades out of date.

I’ve enjoyed the Harry Potter phenomenon and J. K. Rowling’s success. In the back of my mind is a faint-and-growing-fainter hope that I too could find some small measure of recognition for my presumed talent.

Not a real problem, as I enjoy writing anyway, but it’s a thought.

The Harry story takes him from his last moments with the Dursleys to being on the run and hunted as he attempts to undermine Voldemort’s growing evil influence. This is only half the story recorded in the last book, and the final movie will be released next year, relating the conflict at Hogwart’s School, and much mayhem.


1,333 posted on 11/20/2010 5:52:51 AM PST by NicknamedBob (Maybe I can become a were-spork-weasel. It is good to have aspirations. Essential, actually.)
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To: NicknamedBob

Got any 3’s?

Maybe I’ll just read the books again and see whether to watch the movie now or wait until it’s on DVD. I dunno.

The only thing definite in my life right now is that I’ll get up each day, though the time may not be the same. ;o]


1,334 posted on 11/20/2010 5:56:35 AM PST by Monkey Face (This statement is false.)
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To: Monkey Face
I cannot believe you people have kept this thread going this far on nothing relating to the original post!!!

Kudos!

1,335 posted on 11/20/2010 5:59:16 AM PST by mad_as_he$$ (What flavor Kool-aid are you drinking?)
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To: mad_as_he$$; Monkey Face; Tax-chick
"I cannot believe you people have kept this thread going this far on nothing relating to the original post!!!"

Which original post?

Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice . . . Ooh! Shiny!

1,336 posted on 11/20/2010 6:04:44 AM PST by NicknamedBob (Maybe I can become a were-spork-weasel. It is good to have aspirations. Essential, actually.)
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To: mad_as_he$$; sionnsar; NicknamedBob; Dead Corpse; Darksheare; All

Well, since the original poster is now passe’, the thread is ours to do with as we wish. It’s now the Undead Thread, to live forever!

Well, at least until we dump it on the 30th and find another troll to pave for the next month.


1,337 posted on 11/20/2010 6:07:08 AM PST by Monkey Face (This statement is false.)
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To: NicknamedBob

lol.


1,338 posted on 11/20/2010 6:09:12 AM PST by mad_as_he$$ (What flavor Kool-aid are you drinking?)
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To: mad_as_he$$; sionnsar; Monkey Face

Welcome to this months Undead Thread.
On the 30th we move to a new one.
If you’d like to come along for the ride, drop a line to Face or Sionn and they’ll make sure you are alerted to the new location.


1,339 posted on 11/20/2010 6:14:11 AM PST by Darksheare (I shook hands with Sheryl Crow and all I got was Typhus and a single sheet of toilet paper.)
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To: Monkey Face

DP has taken Tom to a debate tournament in Asheville. The rest of us are presently Hanging Around, but it’s getting warmer outside, so eventually we’ll do something. Maybe I can get Bill to take some of the younger children swimming while I go to Penney’s or Target to look for a Christmas outfit for Frank.


1,340 posted on 11/20/2010 6:21:03 AM PST by Tax-chick (Global Warming: the first faith preached exclusively by hypocrites.)
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