Posted on 11/04/2004 6:09:49 PM PST by PJ-Comix
Blind DUmmie rage continues unabated in you can see in this THREAD chronicling the rantings of the Berserkers. Somehow I don’t think this anger will cool down anytime soon and we can expect the Dummies to be in full Rage Mode for at least the next four years. So sit back and relax, folks! The DUmmie FUnnies show is about to begin. As usual the bilious DUmmie droppings,beginning with a charming soliloquy by Mallrat are in Bolshevik Red while laughing in the upper galleries is your humble correspondent whose bemused commentary is in the [brackets]:
My new mantra: I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[My new mantra: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!]
Starting today, and effective until January 20, 2009, every time something bad happens to a red city in a red state-- something which a John Kerry Presidency might have prevented-- my response will be this:
[Um, let me guess, Mallrat. You don’t give a…hmmm. My memory seems to fail me. Help me out here, Mallrat.]
I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[Yes! Yes! That’s it, Mallrat. Thanks for refreshing my memory.]
Massive layoffs in Wichita? I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[Soooo Mallrat. Does this mean you won’t be sending any gift baskets to Wichita this Christmas? I’m sure those folks will miss having those chemically enhanced Summer Sausages.]
Skyrocketing gas prices in Birmingham? I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[Yeah but what about skyrocketing Malted Milk Dud prices in Birmingham? Surely you wouldn't give them the cold shoulder in that emergency case?]
Seniors unable to pay for prescription drugs in Salt Lake City? I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[Such a charmer you are, Mallrat. Have you ever thought of becoming a Wallmart greeter?]
Young men and women from Omaha, Knoxville, and Jefferson City getting drafted and killed in preemptive wars based on cherry-picked fake intelligence? I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[I have a philosophical question for you, Mallrat. What if someone from Omaha gets drafted but he really grew up in Peoria, which is in a Blue state? We need a convocation of theologians methinks to resolve this moral question.]
Outsourced jobs in Tulsa? I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[But what if the job is outsourced to a Blue state? Again another moral dilemma here, Mallrat.]
Record bankruptcies in Pensacola? I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[So what do you think about Hurricane Ivan hitting Pensacoloa? Silly me. Need I even ask?]
National Guardsmen from Fort Wayne being held over in Iraq due to a reserve system stretched thin? I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[I think we can scratch Fort Wayne off your list of cities in which to commence a political career, Mallrat.]
I DON'T GIVE A F*CK ANYMORE. If you feel so strongly that this President's supposed "values" trump everything that he's done wrong, then fine. Last time I checked, opposing gay marriage didn't create jobs, and banning abortion didn't get us out of a quagmire in Iraq.
You've made your priorities clear. Now I have mine. And Red America, you're not one of them anymore.
[Something missing here, Mallrat, but I can’t quite put my finger on it.]
I DON'T GIVE A F*CK.
[That’s it! You never disappoint, Mallrat.]
Hey PJ, somehow I missed my ping on this one :( I happened upon by accident..LOL
ping me
Gawrsh, I don't think Mallrat cared much about anyone outside of his little bong. Walmart has 1 L.
You know, PJ, I think this could work over here too....
When welfare is reformed and you have to get a damn job?
I WON'T GIVE A F*CK!
When you get old and you thought Soc. Security would save you?
I WON'T GIVE A F*CK!
When you couldn't find enough dead people to vote for your flaccid limpwristed socialist candidates?
I WON'T GIVE A F*CK!
When no one other than some fat cat policy wonks care about health care?
I WON'T GIVE A F*CK!
Try it everybody, this is fun and we all have PJ to thank!
Just the usual high quality entertainment here. I wouldn't miss these DUmmie FUnnies for nothing!
Keep em coming. :-)
Then there's this little gem on the from page tonite:
Mark Crispin Miller: "First of all, this election was definitely rigged"
Posted by Bush_Eats_Beef
Added to homepage Thu Nov 04th 2004, 03:16 PM ET
First of all, this election was definitely rigged. I have no doubt about it. It's a statistical impossibility that Bush got 8 million more votes than he got last time. In 2000, he got 15 million votes from right-wing Christians, and there are approximately 19 million of them in the country. They were eager to get the other 4 million. That was pretty much Karl Rove's strategy to get Bush elected.
But given Bush's low popularity ratings and the enormous number of new voters -- who skewed Democratic -- there is no way in the world that Bush got 8 million more votes this time. I think it had a lot to do with the electronic voting machines. Those machines are completely untrustworthy, and that's why the Republicans use them. Then there's the fact that the immediate claim of Ohio was not contested by the news media -- when Andrew Card came out and claimed the state, not only were the votes in Ohio not counted, they weren't even all cast. I would have to hear a much stronger argument for the authenticity, or I should say the veracity, of this popular vote for Bush before I'm willing to believe it. If someone can prove to me that it happened, that Bush somehow pulled 8 million magic votes out of a hat, OK, I'll accept it. I'm an independent, not a Democrat, and I'm not living in denial.
And that's not even talking about Florida, which is about as Democratic a state as Guatemala used to be. The news media is obliged to make the Republicans account for all these votes, and account for the way they were counted. Simply to embrace this result as definitive is irrational. But there is every reason to question it ... I find it beyond belief that the press in this formerly democratic country would not have made the integrity of the electoral system a front page, top-of-the-line story for the last three years. I worked and worked and worked to get that story into the media, and no one touched it until your guy did.
I actually got invited to a Kerry fundraiser so I could talk to him about it. I raised the issue directly with him and with Teresa. Teresa was really indignant and really concerned, but Kerry just looked down at me -- he's about 9 feet tall -- and I could tell it just didn't register. It set off all his conspiracy-theory alarms and he just wasn't listening.
LOL! Waking up in a world based in reality and not fantasy must be REALLLLLLLY hard for these guys.
"Goofy are you on the ping list so I can stop pinging you? PinG
Keep pinging me, I'm enjoying the show!
Will do. Go check out the riot thread also on thenews/activism page. The Anarchist are out in force. Freaking Wrong, just wrong!
I love your posts - they brighten up my day!
I went over today and bathed myself in hundreds of these posts - and I did it for a reason - I wanted to read with my own eyes what mindset the "enemy" has in this country - what the GOP must stand against.
You know, I used to think that relatively speaking, there were only a few Michael Moore sheeple living in this country. I thought that most people, when confronted with truth and facts, would recognize that they need to rethink their positions.
I now realize how wrong I was.
There isn't enough tin foil in the world to handle the kind of paranoid, vitriolic rhetoric I read today and the kind of language used was abominable. I feel like I need a nice long bath and soak in some antiseptic.
It's probably a good idea to go over there every once in a blue moon to remind myself that there are a great deal of people who continue to believe that "Bush stole the election" in 2000 and apparently now believe that "Bush stole OH and FL" - but it'll be awhile before I can stomach such prolonged exposure to their delusions.
I think I'll just stick to DUmmie FUnnies for now...
Keep up the good work!
Florida = Guatemala
Kerry's height = 9 feet
4 million votes = 8 million votes
Ohio = claimed "early"
Good grief. Every sentence is false or flawed.
DUmmie = Complete nonsense.
:-)
This is some of the funniest stuff I've read in a long time. Please add me to the ping list.
Bobby wanted to do something about it, but they killed him.
I was just reading over there and they want to start another "60's" revolution. *ahem* According to George Harrison on the Beatles Anthology, there WAS no "Love" or "Flower Power". Just a bunch of dirty, drugged-up and strung out people. The press created it from nothing. Yes. I'm old enough to know. One of those terrible baby-boomers.
You know, I think I may be a displaced Guatemalan. I recently remembered a past life under hypnosis in which I was a Guatemalan princess.
Bow down to me, I am Queen of the 'Rats!
Oooh, my foil hat is glowing!
LOL! That's in code, right?
A GREAT way to start the day. . .thanks for the laugh.
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