If the presidential election were today and Sarah Palin somehow topped the Republican ticket, and even if she were joined in the race by an orangutan named Bob, and they were facing Barack Hussein Obama and Joe Biden -- or an idiot to be named later -- I would be forced to vote for her. Yeah, that's right. Vote -- for her. Sarah Palin. And Bob. Embracing that reality makes me want to shower, and it is an acknowledgment that our political system has imploded. I'm the proud owner of a "Hater" T-shirt, for crying out loud, but the future...