My son Michael

6-8-02 | OxfordMovement

[OxfordMovement]

My three year old son Michael died this morning at 3 a.m. He had been experiencing high fevers for over a month and has been in the hospital again for the last few days. The doctors were unable to determine the cause of his illness and had contacted many others to review the many tests they had run on him.

Though he received very good medical care, his little heart just stopped beating and wouldn't start again. I know he is in the arms of Jesus, but I just don't understand why this has happened.

Please pray for me, my wife, and my other children. I don't know what we are going to do. We are all so upset. The doctor at the hospital gave my wife an injection of a sedative to calm her down. I'm feeling really desperate. God gave us such a beautiful boy, and now He has taken him away from us. I don't understand. Please pray for us.

[billbears]

Oxford my thoughts and prayers are with you, your wife, and the rest of the family for strength and power from God. You are in my prayers sir. Added to the Daily Prayer Thread

[F-117A]

God bless!

[lsee]

Ironically, my child had a high fever last night...

and when I read your post, I nearly burst into tears, imagining how helpless and frustrated you must feel not knowing why THIS fever was capable of killing your boy. I sincerely hope the doctors discover exactly what went wrong, not that this will comfort you much. But it might save another family from similar agony. My prayers are with you and your family. I hugged both my children tightly in Michael's honor this morning. May you keep the memory of how he touched your lives forever in your hearts.

[eleni121]

So sorry to hear of your loss. Just remember your little one as well as all little ones are enveloped in Jesus' loving arms...we do not control these things.

[KLT]

There is nothing more painful then the loss of a child...my prayers and sympathies go out to the family...God Bless...

[looney tune]

I pray that God will give you a sense of His peace, and grace and strength for the difficult days ahead.

looney tune

[LaBelleDameSansMerci]

"...I don't know what we are going to do...."

Yes you DO know what you are going to do. You don't want to know--you want this cup to be taken from you--- but you KNOW.

You will stand up on achy, unwilling legs and hold back the avalanche of despair which is threatening your whole family. Every stomach-turning day you will get up and put one foot in front of the other. You will flex the unwilling muscles in your hands and face. You will perform the unbearable routines of everyday life even though your mind is engulfed in chaos. You will stiffen your weary spine so the unformed spines of your children will not be crushed under the weight. You will face down the monsters of despair, grief, rage and lethargy because your family--living and dead--needs you to do so. You will muscle your way through the sea of well-meaning people who will attempt to tame your wild grief and who will murder you over and over with their dissections of your wound; people who will say exactly the wrong thing at exactly the wrong time--as I am doing, perhaps. You know all this.

You know what you are going to do.

In a Dark Time
Theodore Roethke,

In a dark time, the eye begins to see,
I meet my shadow in the deepening shade;
I hear my echo in the echoing wood--
A lord of nature weeping to a tree.
I live between the heron and the wren,
Beasts of the hill and serpents of the den.

What's madness but nobility of soul
At odds with circumstance? The day's on fire!
I know the purity of pure despair,
My shadow pinned against a sweating wall.
That place among the rocks--is it a cave,
Or winding path? The edge is what I have.

A steady storm of correspondences!
A night flowing with birds, a ragged moon,
And in broad day the midnight come again!
A man goes far to find out what he is--
Death of the self in a long, tearless night,
All natural shapes blazing unnatural light.

Dark, dark my light, and darker my desire.
My soul, like some heat-maddened summer fly,
Keeps buzzing at the sill. Which I is I?
A fallen man, I climb out of my fear.
The mind enters itself, and God the mind,
And one is One, free in the tearing wind.

[Askel5]

Morning intention bump.

(Thanks for that, by the way. Was it you or Cornelis brought someone up short on a thread once with a quote from someone who censured another for wailing like a pagan when, as a Christian, they knew better? This hit home with me because for a couple of years there, I did just that. Wept and wailed for nearly a week straight once when my fairy godmother died and we all gathered together at Palais Jamis to await her wake like walking dead who read the Lament of the Moths by day and drank ourselves to sleep under the stars each night. That was then.)

[The_Reader_David]

Memory Eternal! Memory Eternal! Memory Eternal!

[AuntB]

Words cannot express what I feel for you both at this moment. My greatest dread is outliving my child. We hold you and your precious child in our thoughts and prayers.

As children bring their broken toys with tears for us to mend, I brought my broken dreams to God, because he is my friend.

But then instead of leaving him in peace to work alone, I hung around and tried to help in ways that were my own. At last I cried, "How can you be so slow!"

He said," my child what could I do, you never would let go."anonymous.

[Nubbin]

Oh Oxford, I am so very sorry. I don't know what to say except that I am praying for you and for your family.

Sorrowful Virgin Mary, Mother of love, of sorrow, and of mercy, pray for OxordMovement and his family.
Sacred Heart of Jesus, strengthened in your agony by an angel, strengthen OxfordMovement's family. In your infinite mercy assist them by your powerful grace.

[Brad’s Gramma]

Oh, Oxford, I'm so sorry for your loss. God gave you that little one for such a short time, and for reasons we'll never understand here on earth, He took him home. He's holding your baby now, Oxford.

Your Freeper Family is here for you, OK? Anything you need, you let us know. And definitely, prayers for you and your family.

[MissAmericanPie]

My heart felt sympathy. Words fail me, I can only extend a prayer that our Lord wrap you in his comfort, and remind you of His blessed hope. Jesus wept.

[cornelis]

Good post.

[cornelis]

Yes, I mentioned Gregory of Nyssa and his sister reminding him of all the better things than death. Though I have a hunch LaBelleDameSansMerci shows the jewels in post #228.

[hoosiermama]

Prayers for all concerned!

[xJones]

All Through the Night

Sleep, my child, and peace attend thee,

All through the night.

Guardian angels God will send thee,

All through the night.

Soft the drowsy hours are creeping,

Hill and vale in slumber sleeping,

I my loving vigil keeping,

All through the night.

Dear Oxford, you and your family have taken about the worst shock that life can deal you. But little Michael is in God's arms now. It's no use questioning why his life was cut short. Now is the time to have your own faith of a little child and know that one day all will be made clear to you. That's how I and others survive through unexplainable deaths. May God surround you and your family with his angels, workers, and ministering spirits to carry you all through these days and the years to come. Please come back here and tell us how you and your family are doing. Heartfelt regards

[olliemb]

I doubt anyone will ever understand the loss of a young child. God promised love and life everlasting. Your Michael is now at home with the Father and is waiting for you to finish your chores. I will forever keep you in my daily prayers and pray for the solace that is needed at times like this, for the resolution that this is part of God's plan and for the courage to carry on. You now have a very special little angel watching and guiding you in your daily life. I know Michael was very special to you.

[Salvation]

Here is a little story that speaks to God's Plan. I hope you enjoy it.

Once there were three trees on a hill in the woods. They were discussing their hopes and dreams when the first tree said, "Someday I hope to be a treasure chest. I could be filled with gold, silver and precious gems. I could be decorated with intricate carving and everyone would see the beauty."

Then the second tree said, "Someday I will be a mighty ship. I will take kings and queens across the waters and sail to the corners of the world. Everyone will feel safe in me because of the strength of my hull."

Finally the third tree said, "I want to grow to be the tallest and straightest tree in the forest. People will see me on top of the hill and look up to my branches, and think of the heavens and God and how close to them I am reaching. I will be the greatest tree of all time and people will always remember me."

After a few years of praying that their dreams would come true, a group of woodsmen came upon the trees. When one came to the first tree he said, "This looks like a strong tree, I think I should be able to sell the wood to carpenter" ... and he began cutting it down. The tree was happy, because he knew that the carpenter would make him a treasure chest.

At the second tree a woodsman said, "This looks like a strong tree, I should be able to sell it to the shipyard." The second tree was happy because he knew he was on his way to becoming a mighty ship.

When the woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree was frightened because he knew that if they cut him down his dreams would not come true. One of the woodsmen said, "I don't need anything at all from my tree so I'll take this one", and he cut it down.

Then the first tree arrived at the carpenter's, he was made into a feed box for animals. He was then placed in a barn and filled with hay. This was not at all what he had prayed for.

The second tree was cut and made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of being a mighty ship and carrying kings had come to an end.

The third tree was cut into large pieces and left alone in the dark.

The years went by, and the trees forgot about their dreams. Then one day, a man and woman came to the barn. She gave birth and they placed the baby in the hay in the feed box that was made from the first tree. The man wished that he could have made a crib for the baby, but this manger would have to do. The tree could feel the importance of this event and knew that it had held the greatest treasure of all time.

Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat made from the second tree. One of them was tired and went to sleep. While they were out on the water, a great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was strong enough to keep the men safe. The men woke the sleeping man, and he stood and said, "Peace" and the storm stopped. At this time, the tree knew that it had carried the King of Kings in its boat.

Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was carried through the streets as the people mocked the man who was carrying it. When they came to a stop, the man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to die at the top of a hill.

When Sunday came, the tree came to realize that it was strong enough to stand at the top of the hill and be as close to God as was possible, because Jesus had been crucified on it.

The moral of this story is that when things don't seem to be going your way, always know that God has a plan for you. If you place your trust in Him, He will give you great gifts. Each of the trees got what it wanted, just not in the way it had imagined.

We don't always know what God's plans are for us. We just know that His ways are not our ways, but His ways are always best.