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Entering the belly of The BEAST. My day with Hillary

Posted on 08/13/2003 10:35:48 AM PDT by Hillary's Lovely Legs

Today was a very special day.

I had the supreme opportunity to meet Hillary Rottenbottom at Miejer's Thrifty Acres, in Auburn Hills, Michigan.

I arrived around 10:30 am, for her 11:00 am book signing. The parking lot was packed.

I went into the store and was confronted by a sea of overweight housewives in white T shirts and shorts. You would have thought that this was an e-ticket ride for DisneyWorld. Fanny packs abound.

The line wound around the perimeter of the store. Hundreds upon hundreds of clones. All so very excited. They were there to meet their Queen.

I knew I had a long wait, and I was thinking of ditching the scene, because I was in heels, and I didn't feel like standing there for 2 hours just to meet her hieniousness.

Suddenly a dear friend of mine who is the camerman for a news station saw me in line, and asked what in the world I was doing there. I told him that I was up to shenanigans, and he told me to come with him, and pulled me out of line. He took me up near the front and placed me in line. I was about 25 people back from the Throne Of Hillary.

As I was waiting, I just stood and listened to the lobotomized clones around me. They could barely contain their glee. " Hillary is so wonderful. She will be our greatest president"." She is the best wife and mother"........

And don't even get me started about the wimpy men that were in line. It was mostly women, but there were a couple of husbands, probably because their wives were too overwrought with emotion to drive themselves to the Thrifty Acres.

Suddenly, with a smidgen of fanfare, from the bowells of hell, appears Hillary!. I called an audible. I said " Oh lord, she has a soccer ball in there". Oops, I didn't know I said that out loud. Silly me.

Yes indeed folks, Hillary, looking ever so hideous in a fuschia jacket, black trousers, and black sensible shoes, actually looks like she has a soccerball in her belly. Maybe it's a tumor, heck if I know, but there is something there. Hey, maybe it's a fannypack!

Today was obviously not a 'bath day' for the old gal. Her hair was undone, no makeup, no lipstick, but she did have earrings.

As we got closer, women around me started crying. Yes, you read that right, they were CRYING! They couldn't wait to meet Hillary. I honestly thought that some of them would pass out and die on the spot. It was from either too much excitement, or the copious amount of doughnuts that they had consumed over their lifetime.

There was an elderly lady in front of me that asked me for support. She felt faint from all the excitement.

..............as a small aside, Hillary is fuzzy. Remember those soaps you had as a kid, you got them wet and in a few days they grew fuz? Hillary has a very fuzzy face. And it's very round. Pumpkin round. Fuzzy and round and falling. Gravity is not being kind. ..........

Back to the old lady....

She kibbitzed with Hillary about how proud she was of her and how she will be a great president. Hillary shook her head, signed the books that were being shoved in front of her, and then came me.

I was in orange and fuschia in the sea of white T shirts and Hillary buttons. Hillary was signing away and I said " Who's on the cover of your book?"

IF LOOKS COULD KILL.

Hillary and I did lazer beam eyeballs of hate to each other.

If only she knew that the one questioning her was actually her nemesis...Hillary's Lovely Legs.

Suddenly a vice-like grip was on my left arm, and I was pulled away from Hillary. They handed me my book, and I was on my way.

My cameraman friend said he got it on tape and hopes he can use it, but he wanted to know what in the world I said to her to make her use her " GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE face".

I told him that I said " I have Vince Foster's murder on tape".

My silly friend, he thought I was serious. I told him what I really said and he laughed. I hope to get a copy of the tape. It will be priceless.

So I left the Thrifty Acres among the clones clutching their precious books with tears in their eyes, and as I was exiting, I came across the Hillary Rodham Clinton Support Group.

This is an organization of old bitties from Ann Arbor. They all had on matching T-Shirts with a big photo of Hillary on it. They carried signs that said " Hillary" and matching sun visors. They were going to go in for a private meeting with Hillary and a photo session. They have been so supportive of her, she had been through so much and is such a wonderful woman. ( oh spare me)

So that's it. I entered the belly of the beast and got to see old fuzzy face and survived.

So where's my T-shirt?


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Editorial; US: Michigan; Your Opinion/Questions
KEYWORDS: beelzebubba; bestfreepever; billsballs; book; booksigning; classic; clinton; crustypantsuit; freehll; hildebeast; hillary; hillaryclinton; hughhewitt; ickywoman; livinghistory; lyinghistory; notaniceperson; pregnant; takeabath; thebeast; whosonthecoverofbook; wickedwitchofnewyork
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
Better question to her heinous...
Did you know Ann Coulter called you a TRAITOR(basically)... and PROVED IT... in her new book.?
101 posted on 08/13/2003 12:19:50 PM PDT by hosepipe
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To: UCANSEE2
Anyone who thinks Hillary can't win the presidency should look to Janet Napalitano, who ran on the platform of raising taxes for education, as govenor of Arizona. It was the women eho showed up and voted her/him/whatever it is into office.
102 posted on 08/13/2003 12:20:45 PM PDT by riri
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs; kristinn; Angelwood; Doctor Raoul; sauropod; firebrand; tgslTakoma; ...
When she looked at me, not only was it stone cold quiet, but I would have sworn I felt a chill in the air.
Still, she specifically ASKED FOR this kind of "in your face" confrontation when she was on the "Tonight Show."

Partial Transcript From Leno: Hillary on Being Freeped at Living History Book Signings
Monday, August 1, 2003 | Kristinn
Posted on 08/04/2003 10:54 PM PDT by kristinn

Three years ago this summer when Hillary Clinton was running for the Senate as a, ahem, New Yorker, she appeared on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. She talked about some guy in a devil suit following her around New York (our very own Doctor Raoul, in fact.)

In current interviews, she's still talking about the devil following her around at the book signings for her memoir, Living History.

Mrs. Clinton was on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno again tonight. Jay opened the interview asking how her book tour was going:

J: It's good to see you!

H: Thank you, I'm glad to be here.

J: You look very happy, you seem happy, are you, is like a happy time now?

H: Jay, it is, it's a very happy time--no it is! (Makes googoo eyes while touching Jay on the arm.) I'm having a great time. I love, you know, my work in the Senate. I love living in New York and representing New York and I'm having a great time going around the country on this book tour. I've met so many fabulous people. Yeah, I mean, I think probably in the last two months about twenty-seven thousand people have to come see me at these book signings.

J: So you've signed, your hand, um you should have one arm like this shouldn't you? (Jay holds up clawed hand and bent arm indicating carpal tunnel, Hillary does the same.)

H: Well, you know, it's such an invigorating experience. It's just this part of my body (holds wrist) from my wrist down that gets really worn out. But people have been terrific. They, you know, they come through the line, they have stories. They tell me this is the first book they've ever bought, or they bring their daughters to meet me.

J: That's not good is it?

H: No I think it's wonderful (Hillary makes googoo eyes at Jay and touches him on the arm again.)

J: No but I mean if they're an adult and this is the first book, oooo, I mean doesn't that say something about our educational system?

H: Well it might say something about, about their income. You know, I mean, cuz books to alot of people are a luxury. You know, maybe they go to the library instead. But they've been so, people have been so enthusiastic and they come through and, you know, and say things like, you know, I played pinochle, too, as a kid, you know. Or I loved your stories about going to South Asia because that's where I'm from. I mean it's just, it's been a great experience.

J: Well how about like, cuz whenever any political person, and especially you show up, there's always the crazy people. I mean there must be that one sort of guy who waits in line because he wants to say something nasty when he gets up. And he's actually bought a book so he can give his, I mean, does, has that happen, do you fear that?

H: That hasn't happened yet.

J: Oh, okay.

H: That hasn't happened yet. But what has happened is that they can't bring themselves to buy the book so they stand out, across the street yelling at me (Hillary gestures outward)

J: Laughs

H: That's fine, that's all part of the First Amendment and everything. But they don't, they don't actually buy the book and come through to yell at me.

J: Okay, so they're not that committed.

H: Not that committed. No, I think they're sorta lukewarm about it after all..

CLICK HERE for the rest of that thread
Be careful what you wish for on national TV, Hillary. :o)
It is a good thing that our FRiend "HLL" has the good manners to honor your request in such a tasteful manner.

103 posted on 08/13/2003 12:22:26 PM PDT by RonDog
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To: UCANSEE2
Very astute observation.

Perhaps it is ordained. The country is so sick maybe the only answer is for it to collapse.

Hillary will open the gates of Hell.
104 posted on 08/13/2003 12:23:36 PM PDT by the gillman@blacklagoon.com (Mean spirited liberals suck!)
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To: UCANSEE2
That group is one of the largest voting blocs in the US.

From what I saw is that she appeals to women with no fashion sense whatsoever.

"She is fabulous. She will be a wonderful first woman president! (Now where is the closest Krispy Kreme?)"

105 posted on 08/13/2003 12:24:17 PM PDT by Hillary's Lovely Legs (a 'true conservative' would rather keep Davis than elect Arnold just so they can say 'I told you so')
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
Excellent Freep! I literally burst out laughing and had to explain why to several people that work around me.

Great story!!

106 posted on 08/13/2003 12:24:41 PM PDT by SW6906
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To: RonDog
J: Okay, so they're not that committed.

H: Not that committed. No, I think they're sorta lukewarm about it after all..

See. I am committed. Or is that Should BE committed?

107 posted on 08/13/2003 12:26:50 PM PDT by Hillary's Lovely Legs (a 'true conservative' would rather keep Davis than elect Arnold just so they can say 'I told you so')
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
Great job HLL. Hoping to see the video!
108 posted on 08/13/2003 12:33:50 PM PDT by Jen
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To: UCANSEE2
In retrospect,it will be seen that the protestors were integral to getting her elected. WE WILL BE RESPONSIBLE FOR HELPING HER WIN !

That DOES suck! Okay, how do we fix it?

The reason I say we are helping, is that the protestors just agitate this unplanned for, unaccounted for, ignored group. Make them even more sure they are doing the right thing, putting Hillary in office as President. Our Freeper in the devil outfit gives them the idealistic picture of all manhood as the devil, and Hillary as the WHITE SAINT who will ride in and save middle age women from the ravages of time and loneliness, from the trauma of lost loves and loneliness. You see, that voting group, Divorced or unhappily married women whose husbands dumped them for a younger woman, is what Hillary is appealling to with her book and interviews. That group is one of the largest voting blocs in the US.

I must be abnormal, because I almost fit into that demographic, yet feel nothing but contempt for her.

You make a very good point. How do we make this large group feel for Hillary the way we do? How do we make our FReeps work for us and against Hillary?

109 posted on 08/13/2003 12:36:28 PM PDT by TheSpottedOwl (I need a new tag line)
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
Lines of fat women for Hillary
110 posted on 08/13/2003 12:37:59 PM PDT by bmwcyle (Here's to Hillary's book sinking like the Clinton 2000 economy)
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
How does her heinous's signature look on the inside cover of your book?

Thanks for the report.
111 posted on 08/13/2003 12:40:10 PM PDT by Fred Mertz
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To: RonDog; UCANSEE2
Ron, check out #99 and #109. UCAN raises a very good, if disturbing, point :(

You might want to pass #99 on to certain people.

112 posted on 08/13/2003 12:44:07 PM PDT by TheSpottedOwl (I need a new tag line)
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs

113 posted on 08/13/2003 12:47:33 PM PDT by At _War_With_Liberals (All Dems is Pimps and Ho's)
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
I wonder how she decides which days she'll "get up" the look and which days are "no bath" days? I swear, I've never seen a woman who can transition so dramatically from one photo to the next.

I loved you question! It's right up there with "boy, you sure clean up nice."

114 posted on 08/13/2003 12:47:43 PM PDT by anniegetyourgun
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To: bmwcyle
Oh my word.....

and to think that scene is being repeated over and over and over in cities across the nation. yikes.

115 posted on 08/13/2003 12:48:12 PM PDT by ZinGirl
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
Bravo!

Same old gal!

Good for YOU!!!

;)

116 posted on 08/13/2003 12:48:53 PM PDT by gaijin
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To: At _War_With_Liberals

117 posted on 08/13/2003 12:51:51 PM PDT by putupon (Wake up & smell the RINOs)
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs

118 posted on 08/13/2003 12:54:10 PM PDT by At _War_With_Liberals (All Dems is Pimps and Ho's)
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To: UCANSEE2
Make them even more sure they are doing the right thing, putting Hillary in office as President.

They are already sure that they are doing the right thing.
There needs to be more Hillary FReeps, not less. It's the only way to show that not everyone agrees with her. Otherwise all you get are the, "I loooove Hillary. She'll just be the greatest president since George Washington!" comments.

If that's all you hear and never hear about anyone not liking her then a lot of the easily swayed swing vote is going to go her way.

119 posted on 08/13/2003 12:54:34 PM PDT by Just another Joe (FReeping can be addictive and helpful to your mental health)
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To: Hillary's Lovely Legs
This is fabulous. Ask your friend if you can have an .mpg of the clip. Then you can share it with the rest of us. It would be wonderful to see the expression on her face when you ask 'the question.'
120 posted on 08/13/2003 12:55:22 PM PDT by SuzanneC
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