Please, No More Posting of the French Email Story!!!

[Admin Moderator]

For the love of God, please, I beg you- no more postings of the 'French Government Bans The Term E-Mail' story. There are already several copies up, and we've pulled many more in the past day.

Have mercy on us. I beg thee.

The same goes for the Google WMD story. Uncle!!!

Only you can prevent duplicates- please search before posting

[jriemer]

Someone will post the "French E-mail Story" again or we will we will taunt you a second time!
You two-toed whopper of other people's bottoms!

[Calpernia]

[TheBigB]

Hmmmm. Something's still missing. Oh, I know:

[4mycountry]

[Mr. Bird]

Ping me later, I have to shower.

[Drango]

What about some threads about males going blind and growing hair on their palms...

[Calpernia]

Advanced Search    Preferences    Language Tools    Search Tips 

Search: the web

Web

Images

Groups

Directory

News

Did you mean: french military defeats  

No standard web pages containing all your search terms were found.

Your search - french military victories - did not match any documents.

Suggestions:

- Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
- Try different keywords.
- Try more general keywords.
- Try fewer keywords.

Also, you can try Google Answers for expert help with your search.

---

Google Home - Advertise with Us - Search Solutions - Services & Tools - Jobs, Press, & Help

Parody transcripted ©2003 Albino Blacksheep
This Parody is not sponsored or endorsed by Google
Click here to tell a friend about this page!

************************************************************

Defeats Yields:

************************************************************

The Complete Military History of France
- Gallic Wars - Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. - Hundred Years War - Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted. - Italian Wars - Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians. - Wars of Religion - France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots - Thirty Years War - France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her. - War of Revolution - Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux. - The Dutch War - Tied - War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power. - War of the Spanish Succession - Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since. - American Revolution - In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting." - French Revolution - Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French. - The Napoleonic Wars - Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer. - The Franco-Prussian War - Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night. - World War I - Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline. - World War II - Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song. - War in Indochina - Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu - Algerian Rebellion - Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux. - War on Terrorism - France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's. The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?", but rather "How long until France collapses?" "Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage." Or, better still, the quote from last week's Wall Street Journal: "They're there when they need you."
	www.albinoblacksheep.com MAIN PAGE - Video Files - Audio Files - Image Files - Flash Files - Games - Feedback - MessageBoard - Chat - Download

[Cathryn Crawford]

How about a thread about how glad we all are that this fundraiser is nearly over?

[TheBigB]

You should change your tag to "taunts Mods endlessly" :)

[jriemer]

A Møøse once bit my sister...

[jriemer]

No realli! She was Karving her initials øn the møøse with the sharpened end
of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law -an Oslo
dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo
Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink"...

[Calpernia]

Does that mean I'm heading here?

[4mycountry]

You may be having too much fun on a thread WHEN.... ;)

[Fred Mertz]

Well, I haven't checked my pings yet. I'll check it out later honey dumpling;^0 Thanks.

[TheBigB]

....WHEN the phrase "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink"..." makes you laugh so hard that milk comes out your nose, and you aren't even drinking milk.

[TomServo]

C'mon. Search for an article. Ya gotta be kiddin'...

[yournamehere]

What's this I hear about some New Zealander building a Hobbit Hole? Has anyone heard anything about this ?

McBump

[afraidfortherepublic]

The French have banned the term EMAIL? Why goodness gracious, I've never heard of such a thing. [ sarcasm button off ]

[RaceBannon]

HEY!

I posted that WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION thread because no one, as usual, pinged me to the other threads on it before they self destructed!

I'll have you KNOW! PPPBBBBTTTT!!!

[Diddle E. Squat]

Now this was a classic deserving of a repost:

Texas High School Band Captures France