A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day....12-12-02

FreeTheHostages; MudboySlim; Billie | Billie; MudboySlim; FreeTheHostages

[Billie]

A Few of FR's Finest.....
......Every Day

FR is a Treasure Trove of talented, compassionate, patriotic, wonderful people who gather every day to discuss the latest news and issues; salute and support our military and our leaders;  tell a few jokes;  learn a new word;  write poetry;  pray for those in need;  and congratulate those who are deserving. Thank you, Jim Robinson, for giving us the vehicle in which we can express ourselves.

Free Republic made its debut in September, 1996, and the forum was added in early 1997.   I can remember lurking when there were only a few regulars who posted, and now there are over 60,000 who have registered for posting privileges. The forum is read daily by tens of thousands of concerned citizens and patriots from all around the country and the world.

A Few of FR's Finest November 11, 2001

So many people have written me since my original Veteran's Day Tribute, asking how they, or a loved one, could be included in that tribute. Since I can no longer add the photos to the body of the thread, I've been including them in additional posts as I received enough to make another collage.

Still that doesn't seem to be enough. I think there's never been a better nor more appropriate time to keep the faces of our own Veterans and Active Military in front of FReepers--every day! That's why I wanted to do yet another Daily Thread .....ABOUT FReepers .....and FOR FReepers. But not only about our Military FReepers; for all FReepers! Wouldn't it be nice to get to know a few of the other FReepers as well? That's why, in addition to seeing FR's Finest Military Personnel every day, I thought it might be fun to feature a different FReeper (or FReepers) each day. If you would like to be pictured, or know someone who would, please FReepmail me and we'll turn the spotlight - on YOU - for the day!

And do let me know if you'd like your picture added to the groups of Veterans/Active Military below. I will keep this page updated, and continue to add them to the comment section of the original Veteran's Day thread as well.

TOP: Logos, SwedeGirl's hubby, Neil E Wright, FallGuy, 1John, Sneakypete
MIDDLE:  T'wit, COB1, LadyX, Dick Bachert, 68-69TonkinGulfYatchClub
BOTTOM:  YankeeinSC, Delta21, JoeSixPack1

TOP:  Bosniajmc, AFVetGal, Archy, A Navy Vet
MIDDLE:  4TheFlag, Aeronaut, 68Grunt, Xinga
BOTTOM:  Codger, AAABest, Clinton's A Liar, Duke809, dcwusmc

TOP:  mc5cents, Norb2569, LBGA's son, VanJenerette
MIDDLE:  Jim Robinson, KJenerette, davidosborne, KG9Kid
BOTTOM:  gwmoore, Equality7-2521, SAMWolf

TOP:  porgygirl, Phil V., MudPuppy, NorCoGOP
MIDDLE:  RaceBannon, OneidaM, rdb3, jwTexian
BOTTOM:  USMC Vet, TheMayor, Vineyard, rhododogma

We now have eleven groups of veterans/active military; we will post each group of three or four twice a week, with thumbnail/links of the remaining seven or eight groups on each thread. Click on any of the thumbnails below to see the group full-size.

         

GROUP 5A: TOP:  spectr17, RightOnline, SERE_Doc, Tet68. MIDDLE:  FutureSnakeEater, RightOnline's wife, CIApilot, Clamper1797. BOTTOM:  usmcobra, onedoug, DiverDave, Joe6-pack.

GROUP 6A: TOP:  g'nad, AgThorn's son Justin, SLB, AgThorn's son Brett. MIDDLE:  fish70, razorback-bert, CheneyChick, Leroy S Mort, Mark17. BOTTOM:  Terry's Take, Taxman, DinkyDau.

GROUP 7A: TOP:  ValerieUSA's son Grant, SK1Thurman, kd5cts, RangerVetNam, dansangel and .45man's son-in-law Tony.BOTTOM:  rangerX, Old China Hand, Trish, Howlin's dad, Mustang.

GROUP 8A: TOP: ohioWfan's son, MamaBear's father-in-law, MamaBear's dad, ladtx. MIDDLE:  The Mayor's niece, M.Kehoe, Beach_Babe's son-in-law. BOTTOM:  deadhead's dad, HiJinx, Severa's hubby, viligantcitizen's granddad.

      

GROUP 9A: TOP: Q6-God, Scan59, Mama Bear and JKPhoto's son, ofMagog. MIDDLE:  Big'ol_freeper, JustAmy's great uncle, Prodigal Son. BOTTOM:  JustAmy's husband, JustAmy's brother-in-law, JustAmy's brother.

GROUP 10A: TOP: dakine's wife, MeeknMing's dad, Auntbee's nephew, MilitiaMan7, AlasBabylon. BOTTOM:  Joe Brower, Temple Owl, Temple Owl's wife, dutchess' dad, Aomagrat.

GROUP 11A: TOP: ladtx #2 son; DiverDave's twin Don; petuniasevan and husband poorman; Mustard; ladtx #1 son. BOTTOM: AlamoGirl's brother Floyd; AG's dad; AG's brother Jim (inset); WVNan's husband; ladtx' Aunt Eva.

                     

HOLIDAY TOP-TEN-LIST CONTEST
by FreeTheHostages and Mudboy Slim
Graphics and layout by Billie

         

HEY YOU!!
Yeah, YOU! We're talking to YOU!!

Ever said to yourself, "My posts here are so clever, so nice, shouldn't I win a prize for them?" Good question!

Here's our answer to this question: Maybe yes, maybe no. Let's find out! THE HOLIDAY TOP-TEN-LIST COMPETITION HAS COMMENCED!!!

Another Freeper Finest Contest Thread!! With a REAL PRIZE: Your Chance to Win a Copy of the Clinton Legacy Cookbook!

Top Ten Reasons You Should Join the Contest

10.  You have to play to win: must post by 10 PM PST tonight! Multiple entries accepted.

9.  The judging will be completely irrational (FreeTheHostages and Mudboy Slim!), so your chances of winning are no less than the next person's. We'll probably have Honorable Mention designations and such.

8.  Did we mention you get a *real* prize mailed to you - a copy of the Clinton Legacy Cookbook? This is a long time in the making, a work of love by Carlo3b with the help of many Freepers and his beloved Angelique. A $20 value, you can have yours free!!

7.  You pick your theme for the top ten list, as long as it is somehow vaguely tied to the holidays.

6. It can be funny. It can be serious. It's whatever you want. For example:

"Top Ten Excuses for Not Doing One's Holiday Shopping"
"Top Ten Things Santa Should Put in Daisy Scarlett's Stocking"
"Top Ten Things I'm Getting the Freeper Finest Hostesses for Christmas"
"Top Ten Reasons Why Hanukkah is Better"
"Top Ten Things President Bush Wants for Christmas"
"Top Ten Reasons Why I'm Looking Forward to Christmas In America"
"Top Ten Cute Things Mixer's Puppy Could Wear on December 25th"
"Top Ten Holiday Wishes for the Families Who Lost Loved Ones on 9/11 / in Vietnam/ etc."

5.  If you don't join the contest, and the top ten list that wins reads like it was written by a reptile, it will be too late for you to say, "Sheesh, my five-year old son could have done better than that."

4.  There are so many different ways you can make your list "count" and make your fellow Freepers laugh or smile. Cuteness countess. Patriotism counts. Humor counts. Sincerity counts. Everything counts. Clever counts a lot.

3.  Here on FR's Finest, your literary work will be read and, if you're a regular, you know that your Finest friends will find something nice to say about it, even if you do submit a list with the theme:

"Top Ten Things I'd Like to Give My Ex-Boyfriend for Christmas - the Guy Who Dated Me For Five Years But Would Never Go So Far as to Commit to Suggesting That I'm the One Until He Broke Up with Me (He Claims) Because I Seem Unhappy About Something."

You just know that some cheerful Pippin or Aquamarine or Mixer will stop by your post and say, "Well now, isn't that lovely!" with a big smile.

2.  If you run out of ideas before you get to 10, there are always amusing ways to fill out your list.

....and the number one reason you should enter our contest:

(Drum roll please)

1. Because you *just know* you're so clever someone *ought* to give you a prize, right?

The Rules

1.  We don't have 'em. Your judges, FreeTheHostages and Mudboy Slim, aren't big on rules.

Holiday Helpers

So we're not having any. We're guest-hosting this thread to help out the regular hosts this holiday, so we pretty much figure we can all do what we want and will dispense with the rules. Think of us as your substitute teachers for the day! That said, of course it would be immensely useful, if when you post your entry, you would ping your judges - FreeTheHostages and Mudboy Slim - along with whoever else you wish to ping. This will let us keep track of the entries.

2.  If you want to ask us about whether there's a rule on this or that, feel free, but you'll find our answer is "there's no rule." Can you work in teams? Sure. Can you steal from a couple of the best entries of a peer? Sure, although the judges are not likely to be impressed by such behavior. Can you use graphics if you wish? We don't see why not.

3.  What is our specific grading system? We don't have one. Do you have a legal recourse if you think the judging result indicates someone had too much buttered rum? Nope. Etc. etc. Get the general idea? :) You're putting your contest fate in the hands of the unrestrained discretion of the judges - whose work, if you've seen us on the gingerbread thread, certainly is laughable. So there should be no shame in losing.

The Suggestions

We do suggest you:

• Post by midnight PST.
• Consider bribes or flattery. We're into that.
• Be patient if you win. We'll mail the winner the

Clinton Legacy Book     (signed by Carlo3b!) as soon as it arrives in the mail to us.  There may be about a week's delay due to the holiday mail, but you WILL get your book before Christmas!

The Motivation

Our prize is a gem of a prize. Carlo3b describes his labor of love, the Clinton Legacy Cookbook, as "The only item to escape the Clinton Administration without DNA on it!"  Makes you hungry right away, huh? ;)

If you really hate cooking, just the names of the recipes should be fun reading. But still if you'd rather, we have an alternate gift - a 2003 Wall Calendar with the theme: "Proud to Be an American."

Our Expectations

Now, you were all smart enough to find the FR's Finest thread. And so we do have the greatest expectations that *every* entry will be just wonderful. So, thinking caps on, everyone!   Embrace competition like a good conservative and ........... to work!
~ FreeTheHostages and MudboySlim

Once again, I'd like to thank our Guest Writers (and Judges) for providing me with another entertaining script to 'play with' and 'pretty-up' for our Finest FReepers. You've made the holidays such fun with your delightful and humorous writing; the prizes you've offered in these two contests are an added bonus! Thank you both for being such an important part of our Finest Family. ~Billie

FreeTheHostages

MudBoySlim

Only Thirteen More Days Till Christmas!

THIS WEEK'S THREADS 12-09-02 Paul Atreides 12-10-02 Gingerbread House Contest 12-11-02 Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!

Opinions by our own 'King of Ping' The guy's good, folks!

Thanks, Mixer!

1) Click on the graphic to open the Calendar.
2) Once there you can click on any month and even click to the right to go into next year. Once you are in the month that you joined FR you will need to click on the number in the calendar and then an add item screen will come up.
3) In the next box enter your name in the "Calendar Text" field and then click on submit.
4) If any of the screens fail to load simply click on refresh in your browser and that will usually fix it.
5) If all else fails or simply if you want me to do this for you send me an FReepmail and I will gladly do it for you. ~Mixer

[The Thin Man]

You only had three more to go!

Well, Pippin, I did say my effort was sorely lacking, lol.

lod, "brutal" is the perfect description. :-)

[Pippin]

lol!

[FreeTheHostages]

Well, you know, we always pick one complete loser for "Honorable Mention" just to show we're serious about being erratic judges. You could still get that . . . . ;)

[JustAmy]

Shaggy went to Macy's and bought a new outfit for Christmas .....
Do you like?

[The Thin Man]

I appreciate you comments FTH and am pleased that you and Mud have high standards for bribes. Though, I have to admit to being disturbed by your approval of daisyscarlett's shameless behavior. :-)

[The Thin Man]

To receive "honorable mention" would be one of the great honors of my life. I just hope you're not building up my hopes for nothing.

[FreeTheHostages]

"great honors of my life"

Brutal indeed! We shall see, we shall see. Something tells me you're tough enough to take it if you don't make it! ;)

[lodwick]

A bizarre listing of ways to be annoying -

Adjust the tint on your tv so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way".

Drum on every available surface.

Remove every line of someone's .newsrc file except the entry for alt.plastic.storage.containers.

Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

Staple papers in the middle of the page.

Ask 800 operators for dates.

Produce a rental video consistin
g entirely of dire FBI copy warnings.

Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.

Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.

Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

Set alarms for random times.

Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."

Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off.

Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.

Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.

Leave your Nine Inch Nails tape in Great Uncle Ed's stereo, with the volume properly adjusted.

Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

Honk and wave to strangers.

Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.

Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.

Wear your pants backwards.

Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complementary mints by the cash register.

Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"

Rouse your roommates from slumber each morning with Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music".

Leave someones printer in compressed-italic-cyrillic-landscape mode.

ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

only type in lowercase.

dont use any punctuation either

Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.

Pay for your dinner with pennies.

Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.

Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps.

Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assasination/UFO/ OJ Simpson conspiracy theories.

Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."

Light road flares on a birthday cake.

Wander around the restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.

Leave tips in Bolivian currency.

Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador".

Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.

When Christmas carolling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.

Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One".

As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

Finish the 99 bottles of coke song.

Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

Pretend your mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.

Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up", and repeat.

Drive half a block.

Name your dog "Dog".

Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

Ask people what gender they are.

Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray.

Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern Drawl.

Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot".

Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".

Sculpt your hedges into anatomically suggestive shapes.

Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol.

Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains,
While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.

Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

Pretend to be a doorman/woman and offer to take peoples coats. If they allow you to take their coat use it to blow your nose.

Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September.

Change your name to John Aaaaasmith for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each A.

Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

Wear a LOT of cologne.

Ask to "interface" with someone.

Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing".

Sing along at the opera.

Mow your lawn with scissors.

Attempt to mow your neighbourghs lawn with scissors.

Dig a large hole in front of your front door and fill with water.

At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batatatatatata-suhWING-batter!"

Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy".

Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend".

Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles".

Incessantly recite annoying phrases, such as "sticky wicket isn't cricket."

Stare at static on the tv and claim you can see a "magic picture".

Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

Scuff your feet on a dry, shaggy carpet and seek out victims.

Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

Never make eye contact.

Never break eye contact.

Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

Clap when a collugue or friend finishes talking to you.

Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.

Construct your own pretend "tricorder", and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.

Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice.

Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

Shout bingo while someone counts.

Make appointments for the 31st of September.

Invite lots of people to other people's parties.

[FreeTheHostages]

Well, it's just that it was a thematic bribe.

It's as if there were a book called "The Etiquette of Bribes" and Daisy had read it and realized that the best bribes should match the decor of the general thread. I thought it was a very tasteful bribe.

One thing I like about Mudboy Slim is that he's a real, rock-hard conservative. When I made a concededly tasteless joke that, in terms of bribes, anything goes, it's sorta like the Clinton White House, he signaled his sincere distaste for this comparison and declared he had lost the stomach for accepting bribes. Some things just *aren't* funny, and there I went too far.

[FreeTheHostages]

When Christmas carolling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained.

LOL. That one hits home. My nephew actually does this.

[FreeTheHostages]

(I checked your list twice just to make sure it didn't say: "Host too many contest threads too close together." Whew.)

[The Thin Man]

Hey, your list has more than 10. You're disqualified!!!

[lodwick]

Ten reasons to rethink retirement:

1. Retire the word retirement.
2. Realize it's a new concept.
3. Restructure your priorities.
4. Renew your zest for education.
5. Revitalize your energy.
6. Rekindle your taste for risk-taking.
7. Respond to new opportunities.
8. Recharge your system.
9. Revisit childhood dreams.
10. Remember, the wisdom to find your true passion is within you!

Too young to retire

[The Thin Man]

LOL! You better watch your words more carefully around Mudboy.

[FreeTheHostages]

Top Ten Least Popular Christmas Carols (stolen from Letterman)

10. Elmo roasting on an open fire

9. Come on it's lovely weather for a lap dance together with you

8. Every Christmas my uncle Louis throws up in the kitchen sink

7. I'm addicted to nasal decongestant

6. On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me, a restraining order

5. May we see Richard Simmons, bite Santa's arm again

4. A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight, probably `cause we're all so full of gin

3. Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way, oh what fun it is to tell your parents you are gay

2. Hillary, Hillary, you're lucky you're not in prison

1. Joy to the world, their season's done, the Jets can lose no more

[FreeTheHostages]

I like to tempt fate. As should be obvious by serving as a judge for the second (and undoubtedly last) time in one week.

[GailA]

Afternoon ALL...finally pried the 'puter out of hubby's hands. Oh, boy another FUN thread.

This one is beyond my poor skills. So I'll just stick to graphics.

[jwfiv]

Top Ten Proofs for the Existence of God

1. The Gift of His Son, the Logos, the Messiah, Jesus.

2. Mesons, nuetrons, quarks and photons, the weak and strong forces of gravity.

3. The stars in the sky, the stars in the sea.

4. Worms and slugs and crawling bugs.

5. Whales and guppies, kittens and guppies.

6. Girls and boys, their sorrows and joys.

7. All of human history, with all it's confounding mystery.

8. Ice cream.

9. The electric guitar.

10. America, and the leaders He provides in Her hour of need.

[jwfiv]

[jwfiv]