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A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day....10-17-02
JohnHuang2 and Billie
Posted on 10/16/2002 10:52:25 PM PDT by daisyscarlett
A Few of FR's Finest..... ......Every Day
FR is a Treasure Trove of talented, compassionate, patriotic, wonderful people who gather every day to discuss the latest news and issues; salute and support our military and our leaders; tell a few jokes; learn a new word; write poetry; pray for those in need; and congratulate those who are deserving. Thank you, Jim Robinson, for giving us the vehicle in which we can express ourselves.
Free Republic made its debut in September, 1996, and the forum was added in early 1997. I can remember lurking when there were only a few regulars who posted, and now there are over 60,000 who have registered for posting privileges. The forum is read daily by tens of thousands of concerned citizens and patriots from all around the country and the world.
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A Few of FR's Finest November 11, 2001
So many people have written me since my original Veteran's Day Tribute, asking how they, or a loved one, could be included in that tribute. Since I can no longer add the photos to the body of the thread, I've been including them in additional posts as I received enough to make another collage.
Still that doesn't seem to be enough. I think there's never been a better nor more appropriate time to keep the faces of our own Veterans and Active Military in front of FReepers--every day! That's why I wanted to do yet another Daily Thread .....ABOUT FReepers .....and FOR FReepers. But not only about our Military FReepers; for all FReepers! Wouldn't it be nice to get to know a few of the other FReepers as well? That's why, in addition to seeing FR's Finest Military Personnel every day, I thought it might be fun to feature a different FReeper (or FReepers) each day. If you would like to be pictured, or know someone who would, please FReepmail me and we'll turn the spotlight - on YOU - for the day!
And do let me know if you'd like your picture added to the groups of Veterans/Active Military below. I will keep this page updated, and continue to add them to the comment section of the original Veteran's Day thread as well.
TOP: g'nad, AgThorn's son Justin, SLB, AgThorn's son Brett
MIDDLE: fish70, razorback-bert, CheneyChick,Leroy S Mort, Mark17
BOTTOM: Terry's Take, Taxman, DinkyDau
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TOP: ValerieUSA's son Grant, SK1Thurman, kd5cts, RangerVetNam,
dansangel and .45man's son-in-law Tony
BOTTOM: rangerX, Old China Hand, Trish, Howlin's dad, Mustang
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TOP: ohioWfan's son, MamaBear's father-in-law, MamaBear's dad, ladtx
MIDDLE: The Mayor's niece, M.Kehoe, Beach_Babe's son-in-law
BOTTOM: deadhead's dad, HiJinx, Severa's hubby, viligantcitizen's granddad.
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TOP: Q6-God, Scan59, Mama Bear and JKPhoto's son, ofMagog
MIDDLE: Big'ol_freeper, JustAmy's great uncle, Prodigal Son
BOTTOM: JustAmy's husband, JustAmy's brother-in-law, JustAmy's brother.
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TOP: dakine's wife, MeeknMing's dad, Auntbee's nephew, MilitiaMan7, AlasBabylon. BOTTOM: Joe Brower, Temple Owl, Temple Owl's wife, dutchess' dad, Aomagrat
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Campaign Odyssey in Baghdad
JohnHuang2
"Whew! We dodged a bullet," a senior aid to president Saddam Hussein confided to me last night, relieved as election returns, which began pouring in at sundown, showed the Iraqi leader had handily won another 7-year mandate.
He meant 'bullet' literally.
"Not that we expected a cliff-hanger," he quickly added. "Iraq is no Florida", he said, smiling ear-to-ear. "We knew he'd trounce that old tired goat." The aid was referring to Boublous al-Dole, nominee of the hapless opposition party. (A plane carrying all 10 members mysteriously disappeared tonight. No foul play is suspected, despite a hundred witnesses who swear seeing heat-seeking missiles flying towards the plane as it cruised over downtown Baghdad. Iraq Aviation Administrator, Fakih Frank Hull Hussein, dismisses the witnesses as Great Satan Conspirators.)
And what a campaign season it's been. "This one's for the history books," crowed a jubilant staffer, firing several shots in the air in celebration. He recounted the story of how, back in February, president Hussein ordered mortar fire and tank attacks on some fledgling all-news TV station in Basra. "I guess you can say it was the opening salvo of Campaign 2002," the aid fondly recalled.
But the assault wasn't just for fun, either. Hussein strongly suspected the outlet, founded by some right-winger named Abdul-Roger al-Ailes, was working for the opposition.
"Our President hated that station with a passion," one senior aid recalled. "He called it Faux News, mockingly. There was this host who would come on weeknights at 8, griping about all the charity money being siphoned off for nukes and presidential palaces. He really hated that guy." That's Bill al-Din O'Reilly, erstwhile host of what was the highest rated show on prime-time. As punishment for spreading infidel propaganda, he got 30 years in a re-education camp. As part of his sentence, al-Din O'Reilly was ordered to read First Lady Sajida!'s, 'It Takes an A-Bomb To Raze a Village', a runaway best-seller. Her book, in fact, has straddled atop the Anthrax Times best-seller list since its publication 15 years ago, easily outselling No. 2, "Between Smoking Dope And History," by Bill Clinton.
"To President Hussein, all cowards and traitors are beneath contempt," intoned a senior aid. "He has zero-tolerance for 'em. Except for Bill Clinton. Now that's a coward and a traitor our president can live with. Our dear leader has nothing but admiration for Clinton."
No qualms that Monica was Jewish?
Shrugging his shoulders, he sighed, "well, nobody's perfect."
As for the campaign, "there were bumps along the road," said one aid, "don't get me wrong. It wasn't all smooth sailing."
For campaign staffers, the biggest scare came on the closing night of the Baath Party National Convention in Baghdad. A major sex scandal had broke, involving Saddam's senior political strategist, Duqaq Dick Musa Morris. Hussein, forced to par his acceptance speech down to 12 hours, saw his approval ratings take a tumble, plunging down to 99.9%.
"Thanks to that moron, I never got my convention 'bounce!!'," yelled an angry Hussein that night.
"But we didn't flinch," said a staffer, "no-one hit the panic button, despite those tense days."
"Our dear leader, scrappy survivor that he is, stayed focused -- like a laser beam. As punishment, Saddam ordered a sex change for Duqaq Morris, his wayward advisor."
I asked him what Morris was doing for a living now.
"Well, after his sex change, he looked so much like Helen Thomas, he now subs for her in the White House press room."
So, where's Helen, then?
"I was told she went to Pakistan, to enroll in the Madrassas. She mumbled something about wanting to understand 'why they hate us so much', 'to feel the hate', or something like that," he said. "After graduation, then come the big plans."
Big plans?
"Yeah, she plans to marry Yasser Arafat. Rumor has it his marriage is on the rocks."
Scarey.
Oh, speaking of which, there were two other scarey moments.
Tonight, as official election returns rolled him, some exit polls in the south were showing lower-than-expected returns, some a disappointingly low 99.6%. Oh no, not another Florida. cliff-hanger.
Then, magically, the big board numbers roar back up to 100%.
"You'd be amazed at what a few bullets, parked in the right places, can do," remarked a senior official in the Republican Guard.
I poked my head out the window of my Baghdad hotel, and lo and behold, you could feel the jubilation, the festivity. The victory rallies were huge, the air filled with chants of, 'We love Saddam -- and Hitler, too! Down with the Jews! Up with the Waffen-SS!'
Close your eyes, and you swear you're in Berkley.
The difference here, of course, are all the Soviet tanks lovingly aimed at the "festive" crowd. The place was ringed with military -- everywhere.
"No big deal, just crowd control, that's all that is" one senior Iraqi official insisted. "Everyone here is free to speak his or her mind -- so long as Saddam approves."
Curious, I decided to work my way into the crowd, mixing things up a bit.
One reveler caught my attention. "I love Saddam! I love Saddam! Down with Bush! Up with Daschle and the Democrats!', she screamed.
hmmm...a typical Boston voter, I thought.
I asked her why she loves Saddam so much.
"I'm here because Bush is threatening my job, my livelihood!"
I asked what she did for a living.
"I do nuclear weapons research at a Baby Milk Factory," she told me proudly. "I used to do Anthrax, but Saddam promoted me to nukes. That's why I hate Bush -- he's threatening to diss our doomsday weapons! That means I'll be out of a job!"
Oh, I see.
The other scarey moment, you ask?
Earlier, as we were watching election returns at the presidential palace, suddenly vice president Ramadan bursts into the room, "I have a cheerful announcement: Saddam had just received a call from the U.S. president!", he shouted.
Huh?
"Yes! President Jimmy Carter called to congratulate Saddam for his victory!"
Figures.
Anyway, that's
My two cents...
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THIS WEEK'S THREADs
10-14-02 Molly Pitcher
10-15-02 Dutchess
10-16-02 Anniegetyourgun, RikaStrom
Opinions by our own 'King of Ping'
The guy's good, folks!
Thanks, Mixer!
1) Click on the graphic to open the Calendar. 2) Once there you can click on any month and even click to the right to go into next year. Once you are in the month that you joined FR you will need to click on the number in the calendar and then an add item screen will come up. 3) In the next box enter your name in the "Calendar Text" field and then click on submit. 4) If any of the screens fail to load simply click on refresh in your browser and that will usually fix it. 5) If all else fails or simply if you want me to do this for you send me an FReepmail and I will gladly do it for you. ~Mixer |
TOPICS: Culture/Society; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: freepers; fun; military; surprises
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
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To: daisyscarlett; JohnHuang2
LOL! I thought this was a tongue-in-cheek piece until the parts about Saddam's admiration for Clinton and Carter's congratulatory call. Those seem entirely plausible to me. Now, I'm not so sure.
To: Billie; JohnHuang2
LOL LOL LOL....thanks for a much needed chuckle!
As I always tell John....His 'Two-Cents' is a priceless treasure!
All Hail our King of Ping....JohnHuang2
To: lodwick; All
To: ladtx
Good morning, ladtx, thank you again. I read these every day, note the dates, the ages, the locations...no California or Texas casualties out of these 7 for a change. Seems we usually see those states listed most days.
64
posted on
10/17/2002 9:06:19 AM PDT
by
Billie
To: ST.LOUIE1; Billie; daisyscarlett; dansangel; mtngrl@vrwc; senorita; COB1; WVNan; jwfiv; ...
Good morning all!
Many of you know that our FReeper friend, Beep, had surgery yesterday. For those of you who are friends of hers and would like to wish her a speedy recovery, click the graphic below. It will take you to a "Patient Greeting Card" page on the Park Ridge Hospital site. (Beep provided her name and a link to the hospital in a post last week.) You should address your message to Sharon Palmer. I know she would love to hear from you!
Please pass this link on to others who might like to wish her well. I would like to see her get tons of cards from her friends here on FR. :-)
To: MeeknMing
;-) Perfectly linked - thanks for the laugh.
66
posted on
10/17/2002 9:17:40 AM PDT
by
lodwick
To: Mama_Bear
Another perfect link - thanks for Beep's hospital. JL
67
posted on
10/17/2002 9:19:11 AM PDT
by
lodwick
To: Mama_Bear
Thank you, Lori - just sent a card to her. I'm sure she will receive many, thanks to your link.
68
posted on
10/17/2002 9:24:56 AM PDT
by
Billie
To: JulieRNR21
Thanks, Julie - love the crown for King John, too! I had fun finding the graphics for this one! The one of clinton is pretty scary - he is SO EVIL looking - he looks like a friend of Saddam's.
69
posted on
10/17/2002 9:27:07 AM PDT
by
Billie
To: Mama_Bear
Thanks for that link, MB.
I believe Park Ridge Hospital is going to be flooded with greetings for Beep. :)
To: Billie; MeeknMing; JustAmy; yall
Buying a jet fighter ?
Either way this may make you smile ! This was allegedly posted very briefly
on the McDonnell Douglas Website by an employee who obviously has a sense of
humour. The company, of course, does not have a sense of humour, and made
the web department take it down immediately
By the way - for once the 'IMPORTANT' note at the end is worth a read too...
Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In order to
protect your new investment, please take a few moments to fill out the
warranty registration card below. Answering the survey questions is not
required, but the information will help us to develop new products that
best meet your needs and desires.
1.
[_] Mr.
[_] Mrs.
[_] Ms.
[_] Miss
[_] Lt.
[_] Gen.
[_] Comrade
[_] Classified
[_] Other
First Name: ............................................
Initial: ........
Last Name ............................................
Password: .............................. (max. 8 char)
Code Name: ............................................
Latitude-Longitude-Altitude: ...........................
2. Which model of aircraft did you purchase?
[_] F-14 Tomcat
[_] F-15 Eagle
[_] F-16 Falcon
[_] F-117A Stealth
[_] Classified
3. Date of purchase (Year/Month/Day): 20..../..../....
4. Serial Number:
...............................................
5. Please indicate where this product was purchased:
[_] Received as gift / aid package
[_] Catalogue / showroom
[_] Independent arms broker
[_] Mail order
[_] Discount store
[_] Government surplus
[_] Classified
6. Please indicate how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas
product you have just purchased:
[_] Heard loud noise, looked up
[_] Store display
[_] Espionage
[_] Recommended by friend / relative / ally
[_] Political lobbying by manufacturer
[_] Was attacked by one
7. Please indicate the three (3) factors that most influenced your
decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
[_] Style / appearance
[_] Speed / manoeuvrability
[_] Price / value
[_] Comfort / convenience
[_] Kickback / bribe
[_] Recommended by salesperson
[_] McDonnell Douglas reputation
[_] Advanced Weapons Systems
[_] Backroom politics
[_] Negative experience opposing one in combat
8. Please indicate the location(s) where this product will be used:
[_] North America
[_] Iraq
[_] South America
[_] Iraq
[_] Aircraft carrier
[_] Iraq
[_] Europe
[_] Iraq
[_] Middle East (not Iraq)
[_] Iraq
[_] Africa
[_] Iraq
[_] Asia / Far East
[_] Iraq
[_] Misc. Third World countries
[_] Iraq
[_] Classified
[_] Iraq
9. Please indicate the products that you currently own or intend to
purchase in the near future:
[_] Colour TV
[_] VCR
[_] ICBM
[_] Killer Satellite
[_] CD Player
[_] Air-to-Air Missiles
[_] Space Shuttle
[_] Home Computer
[_] Nuclear Weapon
10. How would you describe yourself or your organisation?
[_] Communist / Socialist
[_] Terrorist
[_] Crazed
[_] Neutral
[_] Democratic
[_] Dictatorship
[_] Corrupt
[_] Primitive / Tribal
11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
[_] Deficit spending
[_] Cash
[_] Suitcases of cocaine
[_] Oil revenues
[_] Personal cheque
[_] Credit card
[_] Ransom money
[_] Traveller's cheque
12. Your occupation:
[_] Homemaker
[_] Sales / marketing
[_] Revolutionary
[_] Clerical
[_] Mercenary
[_] Tyrant
[_] Middle management
[_] Eccentric billionaire
[_] Defence Minister / General
[_] Retired
[_] Student
13. To help us better understand our customers, please indicate the
interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy participating
on a regular basis:
[_] Golf
[_] Boating / sailing
[_] Sabotage
[_] Running / jogging
[_] Propaganda / misinformation
[_] Destabilisation / overthrow
[_] Default on loans
[_] Gardening
[_] Crafts
[_] Black market / smuggling
[_] Collectibles / collections
[_] Watching sports on TV
[_] Wines
[_] Interrogation / torture
[_] Household pets
[_] Crushing rebellions
[_] Espionage / reconnaissance
[_] Fashion clothing
[_] Border disputes
[_] Mutually Assured Destruction
Thank you for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your answers
will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell Douglas serve you
better in the future - as well as allowing you to receive mailings and
special offers from other companies, governments, extremist groups, and
mysterious consortia.
As a bonus for responding to this survey, you will be registered to win a
brand new F-117A in our Desert Thunder Sweepstakes!
Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to:
McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION
Marketing Department
Military Aerospace Division
IMPORTANT: This email is intended for the use of the individual
addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential
privileged or
unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of
humour or irrational religious beliefs.
If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or
copying of this email is not authorised (either explicitly or implicitly)
and constitutes an irritating social faux pas.
Unless the word absquatulation has been used in its correct context
somewhere other than in this warning, it does not have any legal or no
grammatical use and may be ignored. No animals were harmed in the
transmission of this email, although the kelpie next door is living on
borrowed time, let me tell you. Those of you with an overwhelming fear of
the unknown will be gratified to learn that there is no hidden message
revealed by reading this warning backwards, so just ignore that Alert
Notice from Microsoft.
However, by pouring a complete circle of salt around yourself and your
computer you can ensure that no harm befalls you and your pets. If you have
received this email in error, please add some nutmeg and egg whites, whisk
and place in a warm oven for 40 minutes.
71
posted on
10/17/2002 9:36:00 AM PDT
by
lodwick
To: MeeknMing
LOL
72
posted on
10/17/2002 9:36:07 AM PDT
by
JustAmy
To: Jim Robinson; gracie1; ladyinred
Please see post #65 to send a card to our honorary Fresno Freeper, Beep.
As Mama_Bear said, let's flood the hospital with e-cards!!
73
posted on
10/17/2002 9:52:55 AM PDT
by
JustAmy
To: Diver Dave
Prayers are being offered this morning for Logan's Dad. Prayers to our Lord for a successful surgery.
74
posted on
10/17/2002 10:21:24 AM PDT
by
JustAmy
To: JustAmy; Mama_Bear; Jim Robinson
Condit's kids are Front Page news in the Modesto Bee this morning. Seems they sent out a mass mailing attacking Dennis Cardoza, Condit's protege and the Dems choice in the upcoming election.
I can't access the Modbee.com site to post the article (server problem, I guess).
Kids will be kids I guess. HEH HEH!
To: Mama_Bear
Thanks for posting the latest on Beep and the link so we can send a card.....what a wonderful service this Hospital provides.
To: Billie; JohnHuang2
This article is such clever satire....I knew John was brilliant but I had no idea that he was so witty!
To: JustAmy
Thanks Amy. :)
To: Mama_Bear
Thanks, Mama_Bear!
~ ~ ~ Beep Bump ~ ~ ~
79
posted on
10/17/2002 10:32:15 AM PDT
by
LadyX
To: daisyscarlett; JohnHuang2
Hi daisyscarlett, thanks for the coffee...I had my first cup late last night when you set it up, just had my second, now that the day is underway. Thank you.
JH2's two-cents are worth a million bucks, especially today...so funny and sharps those barbs of his.
Thank you, Mr. JH2.
80
posted on
10/17/2002 10:36:41 AM PDT
by
jwfiv
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