Posted on 08/23/2002 6:44:32 AM PDT by Billie
|
|
|
08-19-02 A Few of FR's Finest Profiles #2
08-20-02 firebrand
08-21-02 Prayer Threads
08-22-02 Dog
Awwwwww........thank you! Rallying for our military is a labor of love, and the least I can do, considering what they do for us. ;-)
...
May 15, 10:00 A.M. :
BOY! Todays the day! I can hardly wait to get to the stables and see that beautiful horse again!
I was very lucky to see that ad in the paper: FOR SALE: FOUR YEAR OLD GELDING, VERY GENTLE, BROKE TO RIDE.
I didnt know what a gelding was until the man at the stables told me that it was a male horse whose testicles had been removed, but I knew it was a horse of some kind.
And what a horse it was! I could tell the man didnt want to sell it, and I couldnt blame him. He called it lovingly, Blivet.
I thought that was a great name so I decided to keep it.
He said it was a sorrel, but it just looked brown to me. He explained that the white mark on his head was called a blaze, and the white on its ankles were called stockings.
I loved talking horse talk with him! He was a real cowboy!
He showed me how to saddle it and put the bridle on, and explained that the girth had to be pulled tight to get the saddle to stay on.
May 15, 11:00 A.M.:
I can see Blivet now standing there in his corral waiting for me!
Ive got on my boots and hat, and Im ready to saddle up and hit the trail!
May 15, 11:30 A.M.:
As I lead him out hes nuzzling my hand. Aww, thats so sweet!
I put the blanket and saddle on him very carefully and pulled the girth up tight.
I notice that Blivet has taken a deep breath so the girth wont be too tight around his middle, and I cant blame him for that!
Heck, I wouldnt want something like that cutting into my stomach either!
Ive heard of people kicking their horses in the stomach to make them let out the air so the girth can be drawn tighter, but I cant imagine anyone being that cruel!
Okay, Blivet, were ready to go!
As Im putting my boot in that thing the cowboy called a stirrup, I notice that Blivet is turning his head around to welcome me aboard.
Ahh, now hes nibbling on my pants leg
No, thats not my pants leg THATS MY LEG!
HEY, BLIVET, YOURE BITING THE CRAP OUT OF MY LEG!! OWWWWWW! DAMN! THAT HURTS!!
June 1, 10:00 A.M.:
Well, my leg is almost healed now, so Im going back out to the stables to ride Blivet since I had to cut the first ride short to get my leg treated at the emergency room.
Im sure Blivet didnt mean any harm; he was just trying to play and got a little rough. The cowboy put a chest strap on him to hold his head down so he couldnt reach my leg.
I hate to do that to him, but my leg is still tender.
June 1, 11:30 A.M.:
Okay, were saddled up! Git up, Blivet! Lets hit the trail, old padnuh!
.
Uh
..Blivet, were supposed to be going now. When I kick you, youre supposed to go
.
HEY, WAIT! NOT THAT FAST!
HEY! WHATS HAPPENING TO THIS DAMN SADDLE??!
IM SLIPPING SIDEWAYS!
OH, CRAP! IM FALLING!!
July 2, 10:00 A.M.:
Well, Ive finally got the cast off my arm so Im going back out to TRY to ride that damn horse again!
My wife is complaining that while I was in the hospital she got the bill for the stables and the hay to feed Blivet and it comes to more than our mortgage payment.
That damn horse lives better than I do!
July 2, 11:00 A.M.:
Okay, Blivet, you can stick your stomach out all you want to!!
HEY! How do you like that old kick in the gut, huh??!
If you turn that head around again, Ill hit you with this lead headed quirt I bought.
NOW! Get your mangy ass moving!
July 2, 11:45 A.M.:
Ahh, yes, riding along with the wind in my face enjoying the rapport with nature and this magnificent animal....!
BLIVET, WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU DOING??!
THATS NOT A SNAKE! ITS A DAMN STICK!
QUIT JUMPING SIDEWAYS!
SLOW DOWN, BLIVET! WHOA!
OH, HELL, NOT AGAIN!
IM FALLING!
GOT TO GET MY BOOT OUT OF THAT STIRRUP!
August 15, 10:00 A.M.:
Well, Im on my way back out to the stables again. The break in my leg is healed and I can move my head again.
The cowboy said I was lucky that I got my foot out of the stirrup or Blivet might have drug me to death!
Im wearing a holster with a .45 now in case that happens again. The cowboy said that was the main reason people in his profession wore a gun to shoot the horse if they fell off.
Im getting ready to shoot the horse even if I DONT fall off!
August 15, 11:30 A.M.:
Im saddled up again, and this time the girth is cutting his damn stomach in two, and my gun is loaded!
Okay, Blivet, lets pound some gravel, hit the trail, bite some dust!
Ahh, now this is more like it! Loping along with the wind in my face feeling the strength of this fine animal between my legs!
I love the smell of horse sweat
.
HEY! BLIVET! WE ARE NOT GOING TO JUMP THAT DAMN FENCE! NOOOOO!
OH, CRAP! WHERES THAT DAMN GUN??!
SHIT! I HOPE THE GROUND IS SOFTER THIS TIME!
September 20, 10:00 A.M.:
Well, Im on my way back out to the stables again.
The hospital just added a new wing with the money Ive spent trying to ride that *#@^*# horse!
The month I spent in traction cost more than my car!
The doctor said the cactus needles would eventually work themselves out.
My wife has gone to live with her mother.
Im in my shorts and sneakers. I gave my boots and hat to the Salvation Army.
Maybe someone else might like to try to return to their roots. HA!
If that idiot in the boots and hat wont buy back that mangy four legged beast from hell Im going to shoot it and him on the spot!!
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled
down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The
guy replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop
finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
It just so happens after the Fresno Tailgate Party someone posted a picture of you BEFORE you acquired Blivet . . . (snicker, snicker)
Just to prove Cobby is not just Mr. December on Billie's calendar, and doubles for Santa Claus -
he is also Mr. Texas!
As JustAmy would say - Ta DA !!!
Have a nice evening.
Thanks for posting the picture of Cob1 again.
Billie, This was the picture I was talking about in that earlier post.
A "blivet" is two pounds of sh*t in a one pound bag!
'Course, in the case of this "Blivet", the amount of each is quite a bit larger!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.