Posted on 04/28/2022 1:38:57 AM PDT by where's_the_Outrage?
A father has gone viral for admitting that he recently told his "bratty" 19-year-old daughter that she can either start babysitting her cousin or start paying rent.
Posting in Reddit's "Am I The A**hole" (AITA) forum under the username u/FunnyChef7259, the father asked: "AITA for making my eldest daughter babysit even though she is 'child-free?'" The post has received more than 10,000 upvotes and has divided over 3,000 commenters.
At the beginning of his post, the father explained that he and his wife have three children—Tina, Jason and Ally. Late last year, after his sister-in-law passed away, the couple also took in their 4-year-old niece, whose father is "not in the picture.".....
"A few weeks ago there were big changes in our childcare coverage and now we lack coverage for about two-and-a-half hours [Monday through Friday]," the father continued. "Jason and Ally both agreed to take one day of the week for babysitting duties, when we asked Tina to take on the other three, she refused, stating she is child-free and means it.".....
"YTA [you're the a**hole]. You and your wife decided to take her in, you are responsible for caring for her. Not your daughter," said u/silfy_star. "Tbh, you're punishing her for your decision and choices, though there [are] certainly compromises to be made here related to cutting expenses."
(Excerpt) Read more at msn.com ...
As long as she lives in the house she has responsibilities there.. this 19 year old isn’t just a brat, she’s a piece of work.
Simple ultimatum, you help watch or move out… period.
Yep, if you’re living under the roof, you gotta kick in.
gotta love the media... this is what passes for “news” today
WHY isn’t she working full time at a JOB outside the house????
Another example of “PARTICIPATION TROPHIES”???
Checkout is at 18
I started working at 6 yrs old painting and construction with dad, the brat can leave whenever she wants.
I bought my first domicile at age 19. 46 X 10 new mobile home-—but BOUGHT it & lived in quite nice trailer park. Worked at American Motors in Kenosha.
Bought my first real estate -—house on ground—when I was 26 and making about $6 an hour. I am now in my 3rd real estate purchase & I bought it free & clear. 5 +++ acres. Never made more than $20 an hour. Am female & now over 80...
These “Parents” need to clear out the nest & make those birds fly. IMO—They are creating crippled adults who will NOT make good employees. IF I were hiring someone & they told me they were 29 & still living at home-—That would be a serious red flag.
Of course, there is no incentive to work hard and earn productivity bonuses, the kind of employee you want.
Yes, he’s the asshole, but he’s the GOOD kind of asshole. Not picking fights or being an a-hole for the hell of it, but just letting his wayward daughter know what the rest of the family is likely thinking. She should be humble enough to look after the 4-year-old for a few hours a week.
Made it clear to mine: at 18 you are either working full time or in school, and your presence under my roof will be of a very temporary nature.
People spend 18 years coddling them and meeting their every want then wonder why they feel entitled and won’t leave or start a life.
What saddens me if the mental health of the four year old. She must be grieving losing a Mom. Moves now to a family that is “fighting” over who will “watch” her. Children, even at that young an age, are fully aware if they are causing problems or if they are loved/wanted. The 19 year old is a selfish, selfish, horrible girl. I am glad she is embracing “child free” because she has no sympathy or empathy towards a little child. The father, IMHO, has raised a spoiled, self centered girl... I hope he and his wife do better with their niece.
At 19 my daughter was raising pigs in FFA,she had 3 momma pigs and would sell them babys as show pigs to other kids in her FFA and other FFA kids surrounding, when it wasn’t show season she sell the babys at auction or private. She made thousands and it was hard work, was so proud of her, that work ethic continues on and is a successful business woman now.
If the recalcitrant daughter gets an allowance, simply reduce that amount by some significant percentage of what the hired baby-sitter is getting paid.
Money talks ...
I agree with you and we bought our first home at age 26. As I mentioned I would like my kids to start making their way in life, they both have good jobs and there is no way I’m supporting them financially anymore.
I was unemployed for three weeks after I got out of the Army. Once I got a job, I started paying my parents rent till I got an apartment.
I was unemployed for three weeks after I got out of the Army. Once I got a job, I started paying my parents rent till I got an apartment.
..........................................................
I got out on a Friday, already had my civilian job lined up and started it the following Monday.
I had a whole week end off.
I paid room & board to my parents, who returned it to me as a starting out present when I got my own place
I was still living at home at 29, but…….
I had been gainfully employed at a full time job for 7 years by then, bought my own car, paid room and board, helped with the chores, did my own laundry, was active in church, and traveled a bit.
I lived my own life and did not refuse to help them when they asked. When they went on vacation, the house was not vacant and once my brother and I finished tiling the back hall for them as a surprise for when they came home from vacation.
It’s not the living at home at that age that’s the problem, it’s what they do while there. My parents were not perfect by any means but out of the five of us, there was not one slacker. It’s how you raise them.
I knew I could have afforded to live on my own, but I could not have gotten a better deal anywhere else and they knew that I was saving my money for when I did get married.
I agree when it comes to Instagram and Facebook making the child perform or embarrassing the child; but this crowd-shared problem-solving may have been the dad's way of letting others be the judge—and showing the recalcitrant daughter the results. Assuming the dad's version of events was fair, it would be hard for her to stand her ground, since so many responses favored the dad.
That said, it sounds like he has already indulged his daughter to a destructive degree. The little orphan may work out in hindsight to be one of the best things to have happened to the 19-yr-old, to help her turn her life around.
I don’t think it will make any difference for the daughter.
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