Researchers At Large Hadron Collider Are Confident To Make Contact With Parallel Universe In Days

sciencenatures ^ | 10/10/20 | staff

[Malsua]

What could go wrong?

When you open doors, what can let things out, can also let things in.

[Brilliant]

Ok. Say hi to them for me.

[Vermont Lt]

Of course it is.

[Deo volente]

Send the tiny black holes over to Biden’s basement, and when they’re finished there, steer them over to AOC’s place.

[SES1066]

If everything gets sucked into their experiment, NancyP just might forego the next Trump Impeachment! Won’t that be nice!

[Pete from Shawnee Mission]

The parallel universe is here. Its the workers paradise found in D cities.

[GrandJediMasterYoda]

Worse even, what if the parallel universe is made up of all Nancy Pelosis, billions of them, and they flood into our universe?

[DocRock]

Bookmark

[HangnJudge]

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension was an instruction tape

[Hostage]

> “ ... fired up to its maximum energy levels ever in an endeavor to identify - or perhaps generate - tiny black holes.”

Tell me then why do we need GITMO?

[Tellurian]

I'm sure they're correct, it's just a tiny black hole. We all become angels on the head of a pin. No biggee.

[sageburn]

So, from what I can surmise. They spent many years and billions of dollars build this big machine which does this; Creates/generates “particles” so small that their mere existence is debatable theory
Then accelerates these “particles” at each other at theoretical speeds
Then, when these particles collide they can assume, crunchy peanut butter is less likely to stick to the roof of your mouth than smooth.
Have I got that about right?

[D Rider]

Whats the difference between that and demons from the pit?

[lurk]

I’ll put $10 on Can’t Happen.

[AFB-XYZ]

Bad, bad, bad idea.

What’s in those “parallel universes” are not what one would call “friendlies”.

The universes are kept separated for a reason.

[Getready]

Arent massive black holes already leaking gravity into the extra dimensions? I believe string theory posits 12 or 13 or 26 dimensions. I have even read that a nonconformist surfer physicist dude postulates 268 dimensions. And relatively speaking, arent the masses of the accelerated particles supposed to increase to INFINITY as their velocity is very close to speed of light? Are we seeing that in these experiments? All based on mathematical concepts...we are math constructs of the mind...really?

[SaveFerris]

Aha!

[blueunicorn6]

If they open up a hole into another universe, I would just like to go on record that I am truly sorry for that flaming bag of dog crap I sent a few years ago.

[AFB-XYZ]

Did they issue birth certificates in Mombassa in 1961???

They did at Coast Provincial Hospital, apparently.

[OSHA]

Might shorten the tribulation.