‘Wax My Ass, Scrub My Balls’-- (Francis O'Rourke's Brilliant Poem)

dailycaller.com ^ | 3/15/19 | Scott Morefield

[a little elbow grease]

‘Wax My Ass, Scrub My Balls’

--- This Beto O’Rourke Poem Is Beyond Belief

Beto O’Rourke’s recently unearthed membership in the hacking group “Cult of the Dead Cow” may not have included the “edgiest sorts of hacking activity,” but it did, apparently, include writing murder fantasies and exceptionally bad poetry.

Writing under the now-exposed pseudonym “Psychedelic Warlord,” a teen-aged O’Rourke appears to be the author of a poem titled “The Song of the Cow,” published in 1988 by “cDc (Cult of the Dead Cow) communications.” “I need a butt-shine,” the poem begins … and it really all just goes downhill from there:

I need a butt-shine,

Right now

You are holy,

Oh, sacred Cow

I thirst for you,

Provide Milk.

Buff my balls,

Love the Cow,

Good fortune for those that do.

Love me, breathe my feet,

The Cow has risen.

Wax my ass,

Scrub my balls.

The Cow has risen,

Provide Milk.

The poem, for better or for worse, has been preserved forever by the Google Wayback Machine as a part of the group’s former website, cultdeadcow.com.

Here’s a screengrab of the entire poem:

[BlackAdderess]

So... can we conclude that this guy is a distraction?

[GreenLanternCorps]

Sounds like Vogon poetry.

https://hitchhikers.fandom.com/wiki/Vogon_poetry

[lee martell]

Good thing nobody from Black Sabbath has ever gone into politics. I recall some of their lyrics.
Same with Deep Purple.

[Army Air Corps]

Oh?

[a little elbow grease]

Ok literary freeper critics. How does Beto’s poetry stack up against Obama’s effort, the one about Pops and the stained underwear, IIRC? ----

______________________

Obama's was better.

Francis O'Dork's is 'udderly' awful.

[Sarah Barracuda]

Just wait til AOC finds out this freak of nature is worshiping cows she is gonna have a COW

[Ken H]

LOL!!

Meme material for sure!

[NorthMountain]

He worshiped a DEAD cow ... so Sandy Ocasio would probably be OK with that.

[Songcraft]

- - -, - - -
"Then get down south, and build those walls!"

[a little elbow grease]

You know the noble leftists will lecture us about Irish Bob only being in high school.

_________

Hmmmm......... when I was 16 I never wrote about running over children in a car.

O'Rourke --- “As I neared the young ones, I put all my weight on my right foot, keeping the accelerator pedal on the floor until I heard the crashing of the two children on the hood, and then the sharp cry of pain from one of the two. I was so fascinated for a moment, that when after I had stopped my vehicle, I just sat in a daze, sweet visions filling my head," O'Rourke wrote.

[mylife]

Yup, Robert Francis is to white and privileged.

[Sarah Barracuda]

Yeah but if that dead cow is dead because he was chopped up for meat she wont be happy

[CJ Wolf]

Sign materiel too.

[a little elbow grease]

I despise Beta, but this is a waste of time.

_________________

LOL.

Then go watch AOC dance at B.U. --- quite hot.

*****

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qj2Xald7NYQ

****

[Texan5]

At least their lyrics are better than Beto’s attempted poetry...

[Rebelbase]

"‘Wax My Ass, Scrub My Balls’"

[Army Air Corps]

You can bet your arse that it will be milked...

[The Antiyuppie]

This brings to mind the flawed, but visionary film “Idiocracy”.

[Ken H]

“Just wait til AOC finds out this freak of nature is worshiping cows she is gonna have a COW”

Beto, you are a madman! Like when you stole that cow and your friends tried to make it with that cow...

[a little elbow grease]

Looks like Dr. Drew is quite right.

Beto's campaign slogan,

'Buff My Balls and Take My Calls'