Posted on 06/29/2018 4:31:06 PM PDT by NRx
WASHINGTON, D.C.—Still reeling from Trump’s previous Supreme Court nominee, Neil Gorsuch, Democrats plan to scrutinize any new nominee to ensure that he or she isn’t yet another crony of something called “The Constitution,” Senate Democrats announced Friday.
“Time and time again, we find progressive laws getting struck down,” Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer said in a Senate address. “And it’s always — always — the ones the Constitution is against. These right-wing judges don’t think for themselves, they just do whatever the Constitution says. And it’s time for that to end.”
Senate Democrats have vowed to make sure that any new nominee isn’t going to be beholden to outside influences like the Constitution, the founding fathers, or the rule of law. “We need judges to be advocates of progressive laws,” Senator Elizabeth Warren added. “Not people who will bow to the whims of the Constitution, pitting its extremist values of freedom of speech and freedom of religion against our agenda.”
“We’re sick and tired of the Constitution sitting in the National Archives, manipulating everything we do,” stated Senator Cory Booker, trying to emote for the cameras but failing. Booker then called a ten-minute recess for him to refresh his supply of fake tears before he could continue.
Asked about their concerns, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell said he “doesn’t care” and plans to “completely ignore” the Democrats in the nomination process since “there’s nothing they can do” and he is “literally unstoppable.”
You have GOT to be kidding me.
PSSST...It’s Babylon Bee. Alert Pookie.
Say what?
Nah- let’s enjoy the outrage...
I’ve got a letter of the alphabet for those guys.
“Time and time again, we find progressive laws getting struck down,” Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer said in a Senate address. “And it’s always — always — the ones the Constitution is against. These right-wing judges don’t think for themselves, they just do whatever the Constitution says. And it’s time for that to end.”
I’d love to see it played, with the response being something along the lines of, “Senator Schumer, we’re waiting with baited breath for your proposed Amendment to the Constitution, repealing our entire form of governent. Perhaps he’ll replace it with the Constitution of the Soviet Union, Red China or Cuba?”
Hilarious!
What kind of following does the Bee have?
I’ll second that reaction.
Hey chucks, the Constitution is the foundation of this country. If you don’t like it leave!
The Bee is known as a satire site.
“Schumer should be tossed out of office....”
Uh, who does the tossing? Who will run against him? Upstate New York is far less liberal than NYC, but it’s the big city which rules, like in many other states.
The problem for parody sites these days, isIt's all believable.
Hilarious and you got me. All good humor contains some degree of truth. This one contains a lot.
Yeah it is.
Liberal judges go by feelings rather than law.
They’ve completely lost their freakin’ minds.
Hawaiian Judge has just ordered Justice Kennedy to remain on the Supreme Court. (/sarcasm)
9th Circuit requires President to nominate a Supreme Court Justice only from their short list. (/sarcasm)
While this is utterly consistent, it has to be a spoof.
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