30 Is the New 50: Old Age Is Killing My Dating Life

Time ^ | September 23, 2014 | Jenny Bahn

[NCjim]

“You know,” he says. “It’s tough for people our age.”

It’s 1 a.m. on a Monday, and I am currently on the phone having an argument with a guy I’d been on only four dates with, three of them good. One of them—the last—was less good, given he had gone MIA for the better part of three weeks and I had a sneaking suspicion he had a girlfriend.

We hadn’t slept together, but the kisses had been the type of kisses you walk away from with shaky knees and blind hope. There was something there, and we both knew it, which is why we were attempting to hash things out over the phone at some ungodly hour. Because at our age, we’re adults, and things matter more. The mistakes leave marks.

Alex is 38. I’m 30. Technically, there are no “people our age.” But I’m starting to feel that a 30-year-old woman might as well be a 40-year-old man, though infinitely less desirable, culturally speaking.

[NCjim]

This exemplifies too many people these days, I am afraid. And we wonder why the country and the world are spiraling downward into the abyss.

[cripplecreek]

Youth is wasted on the young.

[Drango]

Good grief lady...just grab a d!ld* and quit writing about your sex life.

[svcw]

Call the waaaaaambulance.
What a whiny child.

[ClearCase_guy]

My wife works with a woman (37) who still lives with her parents. She recently went on a few really good dates with a guy. Then, last weekend, he pulled up to her house, parked by the curb, and texted her "I'm here".

She broke up with him on the spot.

Now, granted, he was wrong. Not a class move (at least he didn't beep the horn!) but I think she was just waiting -- waiting! -- for the guy to make some kind of error. Then WHAM! You're not perfect! I deserve better! I'll just keep living with my parents until some millionaire prince waltzes into my life.

I don't know how anyone gets married these days. And by the numbers, not many people are.

[MNDude]

I have no idea what the point of this article is!

[Wyrd bið ful aræd]

Sounds like a lucky escape for him.

[Perdogg]

I am at the age where I date 2 24 year olds to even it out.

[digger48]

Nothing a few cheeseburgers and a change in wardrobe and attitude won't fix...

[Marie]

“Girl, he’s just not that into you.”

Let go, move on. And quickly. I can easily count three times she should’ve cut sling-load. He wasn’t worth two months, let alone a melancholy article.

I’m so glad I got married at 19, raised two kids, and now hubby and I can move on with our lives. (Second honeymoon! Yeay!)

[tanknetter]

I bounce back and forth between your sentiments, and schadenfreude over women like this.

Anyone remember this great old story?

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a cr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity … in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold … hence the rub … marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.

[roadcat]

I don't know how anyone gets married these days. And by the numbers, not many people are.

Hmmn… I recently went to a couple weddings. Gals and guys in their late 50s. And they're very happy, things are working out great a couple months later. Young people in their 20s and 30s are too into themselves, looking for a prince or princess to whisk them away from reality, rather than just accepting people for what they are, warts and all.

[johniegrad]

I have no idea what the point of this article is!

Shes bitching about the fact that she can't have a successful relationship by complaining about men. She's far too sophisticated and intelligent for them.

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

I tried to read it honest. But all I could think of was that it is a good thing these people are dating each other because it would be a shame if they were messing up two more lives.

If you are looking to get married, date a grownup.

Neither of these people are adults.

[longtermmemmory]

a woman who says she is a feminist instantly becomes 60.

[Fai Mao]

Q: What do you call the girl waiting for the perfect guy?
A: An old maid

Old joke but true

[PilotDave]

At the wise old divorced age of 49, I’ve finally discovered one of the great secrets of life and happiness. It’s better to be treated like a boyfriend than a husband.

[longtermmemmory]

the lesson in the articles is that a thirty something feminist is LESS mature than a 23 year old woman.

That feminist is in need of about thirty kitty cats.

[AppyPappy]

This generation:
Girl,why should I put up with your weird, high drama azz when I can find a guy who will give me what I want without the analysis?

[moovova]

Is that the victim?